[The following post was originally published on July 23, 2002]
I went to the meetup and met a girl. She's sweet. I dig her.
I asked her out. We had an english tea for brunch. During the meal I realized that she looked strikingly similar to my ex-wife, L.
I have been recovering from that relationship for six years now. Everyone tells me I should go out and date. Or rather noone says anything but if I make mention of dating it comes rushing out of their lips like a pent up river. This felt so natural to meet this girl and talk to her and want to see her again. I dig this girl. When I saw her first I felt my face lit up, as did hers.
I talked to a friend, Suz, about sitting across from this girl and suddenly recognizing her. Suz was encouraging, but to be honest it startles me. That I should decide to ask out someone who looks so much like this women I spent all these years with and yet not recognize this similarity at the time really frustrates me. Suz said that it was a good thing I was able to notice this at all. She said that it shows how I've managed to put myself back together again in the last 6 years.
To me it shows me how far I have yet to go.
In my usual rush for full disclosure I talked to my parents about these events. I could feel the shudder come through the highway open window cellphone when I mentioned my daughter's mother's name.
I could feel the shudder in myself when I realized I had not noticed this similarity. It is curious how we forget or blinder ourselves in reframing the past. I think I had genuinely forgotten what L had looked like.
This girl is very interesting. She's a reporter. Her observations are so acute that its obvious she is very smart. She's extremely sexy. Nice ass.
12:47:39 AM 
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