The following rejected Plastic submission ("appreciated, but [declined due to] lack of user interest;" you'll see) would have probably made more sense had I posted it last Thursday, or Friday at most. Well, if I was too lazy to come up with something new, it wasn't much of a stretch to not put the effort to be timely.

This 4th, Just Say No To Fireworks

What would a 4th of July be like without fireworks? After considering the tons of metals and poisons that burst to the air on every pyrotechnic display, it could be called "environmentally sound." In addition to the charges of blackpowder (containing carcinogenic sulfur-coal compounds) that send skyrockets airborne and blast them into patterns of glowing sparks, fireworks contain a number of toxic metals that produce a range of dazzling colors. Strontium produces blazing reds, copper compounds burn blue, magnesium, titanium and aluminum create brilliant white sparks. Sodium chloride produces orange-yellow fire, boric acid burns green, potassium and rubidium compounds produce purples and burning lithium glows red. Glittering greens are produced by radioactive barium. Maybe it's time to put that bandstand in your town's park to good use again. But July 4 only comes around once every year. What about Disney World's nightly extravaganzas, which are held every single day?

{Update, July 31, 2003}