Well the dullest Boys on TV finally wrapped up their revolting date show (Boy Repels Boy), and answered the question tugging away at us all season:

What's a nice fag hag like Andra doing with a dolt like James? (aka Prince UnCharming or PUC.) We got our first glimpse last week, when we discovered her "this is bullshit!" tantrum was all about Andra. She couldn't care less how PUC was reacting to the news that one of the three finalists was straight.

Once again, she provided the only moment of color, and once again it was all about her. We had seen much of tonight's blowup in the previews, but who would have believed just how little it took to set her off:

It began with her making an ass out of herself bitching about how much of her precious one-on-one time she had wasted on Darren, who she since decided was only there to win. The nerve of a contestant on a game show attempting to win the game! And using up her one-on-one time to do it! Astonishingly, Franklin then weighed in with the first insightful comment of the entire series: "This not a life and death choice."

She erupted. "It's easy for you to say that because you're sitting here and there's a fourth person that's probably not sitting her because I chose you to be here!" Sure that was incredibly self-centered and apparently a bold-faced lie (did we once see her step up to the plate and give James much of anything to go on, much less "choose" anyone?) She followed up with a quicky bitchslap to the face: "I'm sorry, but between you [Franklin] and Shawn, it was really, really hard." Of course it was important to inform him he was the third choice of the finalists, and barely at that.

The good news is, that aside from the final decision, nothing happened this episode. It was all recap and banal statements like: This is it, today it's all over, he's going to choose one of us--an entire hour of filler. Thank goodness! Aside from Andra's outburst, that meant nothing revolting transpired. That's got to be a first for this show.

Wait! I wrote ahead, slapped that down before the final decision scenes. I figured they could handle that much tastefully. Till then, I was only going to make a minor note about the repeated stabs at preachiness. But in the wrapup, when Franklin was revealed as the straightguy, the preachiness just grew relentless. And idiotic! How the producers convinced themselves this show is breaking stereotypes is awe-inspiring. I can't see how they even attempted breaking any, but the reinforcement is everywhere: cast 16 mostly queeny, virtually all vacuous gayguys and put them through an entire series of gay-stereotype activities, to produce week after week of infantile conversation about nothing. Focus on the Family couldn't have produced a better series to discredit homos.

Then to preach to us on top of that? With nothing? This show is vile.

And then it ended with an anticlimactic moment: PUC picked Wes, the shallowest boy in a cast of (mostly) airheads. And one final quote from Wes, who's just a bustier away from drag, that he was here there to break down stereotypes of gayguys. Girl . . .

That's the title of a big USAToday story, and it's right on the mark if you're just getting your feet wet on this political season. It's very basic information, but it's most of the key basics, so if that's where you're at, this is for you.

If you've been following closely already, it might be worth a skim. I didn't find much revealing, but here are a few nuggets:

Rick Wright, Democrat Bill Bradley's finance chairman in 1999, says the third quarter often tests a campaign's appeal beyond family members, college friends and business contacts. "We basically had raised money from everyone we knew in the first two quarters. We just didn't have anyone left," he says. "You really had to see whether people were coming to you."

I had been wondering when that point came. I guess we're there.

And I had forgotten all about this:

Republicans John Kasich, Dan Quayle, Lamar Alexander and Elizabeth Dole had all dropped out by October 1999, before the first contest had been held. The main reason: Bush was sucking up all available money.

I wouldn't count on a repeat though, because the Dems at the very bottom are just out to make a point. And the group just above them still have a shred of hope to cling to. And R's tend to be more realistic.

1. The anticlimactic conclusion airs tonight.

2. Don't watch it. It's appalling. I'll handle that for you and report back. I'm a scientist. I'm trained to withstand these sorts of horrors.

3. If you do watch and you're straight, please disregard all these pathetic people, especially Prince UnCharming as examples of homos.

4. Salon just posted a decent peice on it by Louis Bayard here. Best observation: that the suitors were "mostly interchangeable . . . boys." Worst observation: that the elipses in that phrase replaced the word "gym." Aside from Dan and (whatever the balding guy left is called), any gym servicing these boys needs its licence revoked. Second worst observation: in fleshing out that claim, Bayard said there were no geeks. I could count plenty. All bland geeks, because eveyone on this show was bland, but geekfest nonetheless.

5. I'm changing my vote for who's straight after all. First the disclaimer: I take no offense to the producers playing this who's the straightguy game?, just, like everything else on this show, its execution. Picking the straightguy in a group can be interesting. Choosing between who is performing a sad imitation of a gayguy vs. who is actually a sad gayguy is just sad. Worse, it's dull.

With that out of the way, there is so little else of interest on this show that it's the one aspect remaining that is mildly interesting. (How sad is it that nearly everyone is finally wondering who is the last straightguy, but almost no one is bothering to ask who James will pick. Who cares?) I had been saying Wes all along, simply because he is so plucked and so pathetic I figured he could only be a straightguy tutored by a team of drag queens. I had been drawn, recently by the Franklin crowd, and then I saw a few moments from a repeat of the first show. I happened to catch Franklin's introduction before scolding my Tivo for recording it, and boy did he seem straight. I guess he picked up a few pointers as he went. He did do the best job of feigning it, in my opinion--by not trying too hard. By not trying to be the stereotype Wes is. And Wes, I'm willing to concede just really is that sad. When is he starting his drag career?

And for the record, I'm betting Prince UC picks Wes. The two pretty little wisps of nothing deserve each other.