Well it took most of the day, but I copied all the posts I made at my OpenSalon blog this year over to this blog.

This will return to being my main blog. I had some tech problems here. (I started this blog in 2001 or 2002, and I'm still stuck on the dreaded Radio Userland softward. Sometimes, it gives me fits.) 

I only went back through this year, so there are some 2008 posts which you will only find on my OS blog.

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FYI: to easily find this blog, go to my main site (davecullen.com) and click BLOG in the main nav bar.

SEPTEMBER 4, 2009 7:23PM

Laura Bush announced the line-up yesterday. It's quite a list, and according to the Dallas Morning News story, I'm not one of the headliners. They wrote:

Headlining authors include Buzz Aldrin, M rgaret Atwood, Jimmy Santiago Baca, Bryan Burrough, Jeanette Walls, Jonathan Safran Foer and Taylor Branch.

Maybe next book. Hahaha. The official announcment cited me this way:

AUGUST 22, 2009 12:29AM

I just got the nicest facebook msg from Ashley Merryman, who wrote NurtureShock with Po Bronson, who has had a string of bestsellers.

I have been interested in the book for months, but the msg made me watch the book trailer, and now I REALLY want to read it. (It's from my publisher, who promised me an advance copy. I'm chomping at the bit.)

I think I will be flipping straight to the chapter on siblings, after watching that video. I have eight. It's complicated. I don't expect to have kids of my own at this point, but I'm fascinated by them, and still reeling from my own childhood.

I never forgot the words of Tom Robbins, who ended (Still Life With Woodpecker? with the phrase: It's never too late to have a happy childhood. Wise man.)

This book is going to be huge. Their magazine stories leading up to it have won a ton of awards, so I expect it will live up. I hope so.

I also love the simple but appealing cover that communicates a great deal with so little.

I wondered aloud on my blog whether it might be from the same designer as my cover, and he emailed me saying that it was. He has the coolest blog on how he designs each cover. He said he'll be posting about that one very soon. Watch for it. The post on mine is here.

AUGUST 19, 2009 10:01AM

I did Ashleigh Banfield's show again today. This time, in a CNN studio.

That was fun--despite the content. I've gotten used to staring at a lens, pretending it's the Ashleigh's face. I guess she can see mine, and react to my facial cues, but I have no idea how she's responding to me. Maybe that's for the best. Hahaha.

Actually, that part would be good, but it would be horrible if I actually had to look at my own face and kept trying to adjust everything that made me gasp. They don't have a long enough show for that.

I got there early and sat in the chair for nearly an hour, much of it listening to the latest updates from the trial on the show, and I've been reading about it, too. Man, there  there are some creepy paralells. It's very painful to see so many mistakes repeated.

In this case, the mom knew Castillo was obsessed with Columbine and even took a trip to visit the school and taped it. (She knew because she went with him.) He was in treatment at the time after a serious suicide attempt, and his doctors never found out. Ouch.

So much information that didn't get shared. The docs also didn't know he had obtained guns.

Some day, we'll learn.

The jury has some tough questions to answer on mental insanity. More on that later.

thanks, everyone.

As for the Ashleigh Banfield experience:

She was great. Very bright woman. Quick on her feet. I like her.

(I don't like most network anchors. That's saying a lot.)

If you saw the interview, let us know what you think.  I have to run to O'Hare, but will try to check in via my iphone from there.  I'll be back in Denver this afternoon.

AUGUST 14, 2009 12:47AM

I will be on Ashleigh Banfield's CourtTV show "Open Court" Monday, 8/17 at 9:15 am EDT.

I will still be on vacation with the family, but phoning it it. (They'll put  my pic on the screen--the one on this page--and a map of where I am, on vacation in a tiny rural town, which seems slightly weird to me. )

FYI, CourtTV is now officially named TruTV. I believe Ashleigh's show is called "In Session."

The network wants me on to talk about Columbine, and connections to the Alvaro Castillo trial they are covering, which should go to the jury early next week.

Here is some background the producer sent me about the case (I assume it's copy from their website. I didn't write it, I'm just passing it along):

The defendant was 18 years old in August 2006 when he allegedly murdered his father, Rafael Huezo Castillo, and then drove the family minivan to his former high school and opened fire.  That attack left two students with minor injuries.  Alvaro Castillo was obsessed with Columbine and even sent an email to the principal of Columbine stating, "In a few hours you will probably hear about a school shooting in North Carolina.  I am responsible for it. "  He even traveled to Colorado to drive by the school and homes of the  Columbine shooters.

JULY 30, 2009 2:42PM

After five months, the Apple headset I got with my iphone wore out. (The cord seems to frazzle on the inside, so only one ear now works.)

I know some of you LOVE giving advice, so have at it.

KEY REQUIREMENTS:
1) I like the earbuds
2) I need the microphone on the cord, so I can use it for phone and ipod (listening to music at the gym, etc.)

Thanks.

And any thoughts on why they wore out so fast would be useful. (I usually shove them into my pocket or my gym bag when I'm on the move.)

JULY 28, 2009 2:24AM

I guess that's the point. But still. I do not like that feeling.

What made me think I could watch a vampire show?

Oh right, the first season. It was amazing. And very modest does of creepiness. (I never got used to Bill biting Soukie, but she seemed safe, and they didn't linger, so I just gutted through it.)

I have never liked vampire stuff. This was different, though. Mostly. And incredibly done. It was hands down, the best show on TV last year, IMO.

This season, it's been interesting, but sluggish. The last few eps got really intense in the closing minutes. This one had me on edge most of the time, in a good way. Then the end, I shuddered from one scene to the next. Not happily.

This isn't a review, just a reaction. Alan Ball is damn good, but I might just be too much of a weenie for this. And I do not like glazed white eyes on people having sex. That really makes me shudder.

I also broke my rule about watching this show within two hours of bedtime. Damn. Now I'm going to have to stay up awhile. I do not want this shit polluting my dreams. And it will.

I don't know what I was thinking. I watched most of it over late lunch, but only had 15 minutes left, and somehow I scammed myself that it would be all right. And the worse it got, the more I told myself there were only five minutes left, and at least I'd get resolution. Right.

(I guess I'll watch the end of Kathy Griffin's  "Norma Gay" ep. It's the first good ep on that show in awhile.)

Oh, and I do not like that shaker lady.  Yes, I know I'm not supposed to, but I just had to spit the taste of her out of my mouth. (Especially with her luring in Sookie's friend, who is one of my favorites.)

And poor Laffeyette. And damn, Eric, I just started liking him. And trusting him. I do not like where that is headed.

I do like the young hot church lady coming to the good side, maybe, though not the way she ought to. Is it the good side? They got me to side with the vamps the first season, but those are some nasty bastards.

Maybe I should read the books. This lady who wrote them seems quite creative in conjuring up this world. Impressive. But yuck.

I can't stop, now, though. I have to see how this season resolves, and I'll probably be sucked in all the way to the finish. (Can we make her stop writing them?) Maybe the books will be easier. Or worse.

Hmmmmmm.

Tomorrow marks D Day. That ghastly queen in England will not be at the commemoration.

Way to go France!

(I realize the French may or may not have been intending to snub the British people as well. I don't applaud that aspect. But I'll take small victories over the monarchy where I can get them.) The NY Times says  Liz is "fuming." I am delighted.

Her poor little "highness" snubbed? Not nearly enough.

What I don't understand is why people outside that country--or inside--agree to use words like royal or highness without the ironic distance of quotaion marks. 

The monarchy is a ridiculous and decrepit institution. There's no place for it at a celebration of one of the great historical triumphs of/for Democracy. (ie, not a triumph of/for a privileged, hereditary ruling class. Ugh. Disgusting.)

If Liz wants to attend as an individual, fine, but if she were invited, the institution comes with her. I am so repulsed by the sight of foreign leaders--particularly ours--bowing and deferring to this symbol of a thousand years of oppression.

Her Majesty. Please. She is not a majesty. She has earned nothing. That family should have been discharged to fend for itself a hundred years ago. Calling her that is a disgrace.

I prefer the sentiment Thomas Jefferson expressed in our Declaration, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal . . . " -- That was a direct rebuttal to the preposterous "Divine Right of Kings" and a direct contradiction of the concept that there exists a Magisterial personage such as The Queen.

Monarchies are relics of the Middle Ages--that wonderful period of human culture--and long before. Their existence in the twenty-first century is ridiculous. They are an abomination.

I understand why our leaders swallow their pride and adhere to the rituals of this Medieval anachronism. You can't make every interaction with the Brits into a fight about basic human equality. (That should be a given, but if the Brits insist in rubbing the world's nose in the idea of basic equality every time their country interacts with the world, you have to pick your battles.)

So you can't snub the institution every time, but I applaud every country and individual when they do stand up for what’s right and snub her. I get a great big smile every time I see another nick chiseled out of her royal armour.

Go French!

MAY 28, 2009 2:18PM

We temporarily interupt this blog for a much better post on another blog.

It's called What Sotomayor Actually Said in 2001 Lecture.

It's wonderful. If you've been frustrated at all by the coverage of the nomination, and/or the discussion around it, or if you've been troubled by that one quote bandied about everywhere, you'll be happy to read this.

It is so well put together. It is great work by the blogger J.E. Robertson, based on a great speach by Sonia Sotomayor. 

It reveals an incredibly wise woman who is about to join our top court. I feel better about our country already.

---

(And I nominate this post for Best Post of the Month--an imaginary title I just made up, but highly deserving.)

MAY 5, 2009 6:52PM

But I'm afraid I didn't appreciate it. I didn't catch a wink on the flight from Chicago, so I've been up 36 hours now.

It was just a quick twelve hours on the island. I'm London now, checked into my hotel in what looks to be a nice section, called Earl's Court, and just laid down on an actual bed. Ahhhhhhh.

I can't wait to close my eyes.

Dublin was beautiful, despite the sleepwalking. I did two BBC national Ireland radio shows--The Gerry Ryan Show and The Last Word with Matt Cooper--and they were both really good. Knew their stuff.

I also spent an hour with a very bright woman from Hot Press magazine, which will be out next month.

Then I strolled around central Dublin for a few hours, laid on the quad at Trinity College, and signed a bunch of books at several local stores. Very nice people, the Irish. Makes me proud to call it my mother country.

Tomorrow we've got a lot of radio planned in London, and more of the same Thursday. I think I'll be able to appreciate it more.

---

Links to the Irish shows: Gerry Ryan. Matt Cooper.

---

Also, I signed a ton of books at the Hudson stores in all three concourses at DIA. Looked for autographed copies if you're going through that airport.
----

We're going to try to arrange a place for me to be tomorrow or Thurs at a bookstore if anyone wants to meet me.

 ---

Wednesday Update:

It was a really nice day. Great interviews, and I had two hours off to stroll around Houses of Parliment and lie in the grass in St. James Park and contemplate the whole experience. That made me giddy.

Then dinner with publisher, late-night radio and got home to hotel to news that the book will be #5 on NY Times list next week.

  ---

Saturday Update:

Home! Back in Denver, body on UK time. It's confused.

More coming. SO much to get done now that I'm back.  Some of it will wait till my luggage gets back. It's still in Chicago. Ugh.

Yesterday was the travel day from hell: 25 hours from hotel to apartment. Three flights, three countries, four cities, lots of delays. I'm pooped.

Will I make it to dancing tonight?

APRIL 4, 2009 1:17PM

My friend David Yoo just got a rave review in the New York Times for his novel   Stop Me If You've Heard This One Before . (Yes, it's a riff on The Smiths' song.)

Here's a bit of the review:

It wouldn’t seem possible to make high school jocks, popular girls and losers fresh and hilarious, but Yoo does it. His Romeo and Juliet story is a winner . . .  but it’s Albert’s ice-dry telling of his tale of woe that sets it apart.

I just shortened it for length. There is not one negative word in the review.
This book deserves attention. It's classified "young adult" and aimed at the high school to college market, but I think anyone who remembers high school will be laughing all the way through it, and wincing sometimes, too--in a good way. High school isn't easy. David doesn't sugar coat it. But he's got a great eye, with sharp insights.

(Yes, he's my friend. That's why he's my friend.)

The book is told by a Korean high school kid named Albert. He's just about given up on his tragic adolescence, when he falls for stunning Mia Stone. Everything is looking glorious, until Mia's ex Ryan is diagnosed with cancer. Ryan wants Mia back and totally uses the illness to his advantage. The whole town rallies behind him, and Albert is kinda screwed.

It takes off from there.

I knew David had a winning idea as soon as he described it to me. I wanted to read that book. And man, did he come through.

Don't take my word for it. Read the Times, or check out other reviews here.

Or listen to the great Jonathan Lethem:

David Yoo's voice is so witty and charming it only seems fair to give warning: he'll break hearts of teenage readers of all ages with this bittersweet love story.

Then check out the book. You'll be glad you did.

MARCH 9, 2009 4:48PM

I'm getting all my ailments checked/fixed now that the book is done and I'm allowed to breathe.

After 2 years, and one round of PT, I got an MRI on the right shoulder , which I injured pretty badly shovelling just before christmas 2006.

(Apparently it was a stress injury--the shovelling was just the tipping point. It was when we got the 33 inches, second most ever. For the first several weeks, I couldn't lift the arm without extreme pain. I felt like I wanted to just hack it off. I went to PT for six weeks, which eliminate 75% of the pain. There was no time to go to a doc and deal further.)

So today I got the diagnosis:

No tear, just:

1. Superior posterior labral degeneration
2. Minimal supraspinatus and infraspinatus tendinosis
3. Moderate acromioclavicular arthrosis.

Hmmmmm. I know a few of those words.

Great news that there's no tear, and probably no surgery.

The RX is an anti-inflamatory for a month and 6-8 sessions of PT. Then we see how that works and take it from there. Possibly a cortisone injection if round one doesn't solve it.

 Worst case, if it's still a problem, he could go in to scrape some spurs off, which is way less invasive than most rotator cuff surgeries.

I am so glad to be on the mend with all this stuff. I'm also finally getting my back treated. And I even got some Crest White Strips and cleaning the yellow out of my teeth. Hahaha. But seriuosly. I've got a pair of strips in right now.

I am going to be so damn healthy for this book tour.

---

Note: Here are some prior posts on breaking my ankle:

OCTOBER 19, 2008 4:33PM

Ready to ditch the cast

This turned out easier than expected.

I broke my ankle three weeks and two days ago, and it snapped my psyche at first along with my fibula, but my heart stiched itself up faster than the bone.

The first five days were rocky, but since then I've been fine. I got used to the idea about 24 hours after leaving the orthopod. I haven't been bummed since that first Wednesday.

Most of the pain faded that first week, too.Or it was down below the level where ibuprofen and naproxen would work. I backed off those too early, had to resume full strength.

It's still slowing me down in lots of ways, and I still seem to get tired more easily, but I'm pretty adapted to that. Looking forward to losing the anchor, but not stressing over having it.

I see the orthopod Tueday and the cast is due to come off. (A bad x-ray could nix that, and I've got a family history (eight siblings) of slow bone regeneration, which includes my own slowness on my fractured vertabrae, but hopefully I'll stay on course.)

It better come off. I seem to have worn through the cotton layer under my heal and against my ankle. They are starting to complain pretty incessantly the last few days.

But I've got my eye on Tuesday.

Breaking my ankle

nine days ago, i had a little accident. i've finally got things together enough to edit the msg i sent my fambly the next day,  followed by some updates. (the "yesterday" in the first line refers to friday, september 26):

so i sent the final changes to my book to my editor to be typeset yesterday afternoon, and hopped in the car for my mini-vacation: half a day off in boulder, a little hike in the foothills with my friend patrick, and whatever. i was SO happy to reach the almost-last deadline. nine-plus years, and just one step to go. so giddy to have that weight off.

i got there around 2:15. at 4:30, i broke my ankle.

once we got to the ER--a day later--patrick and i decided we needed a better, butcher story. so my official story, and i'm sticking to it, is that it was an off-roading motorbike accident.

that's the short version, which is true. barely. it was a vespa scooter, goes about 40 mph. patrick has a pair, and he lives above boulder, so instead of driving down the mountain to town, he suggested we take the scooters. sounded fun. we got a late lunch and ran around a bit: saw the jonbet house, which is for sale, rode through my favorite old neighborhood on the path i used to ride to grad school, blah blah blah. it was a beautiful day, the leaves were turning, the scooters were a blast. i was really cautious at first, but i got used to it, and started opening the throttle, giving it full speed.

i took him to my mentor lucia berlin's grave, just a mile or two south of campus, next to Chataqua Park. i never in my life had the urge to visit someone's grave until lucia died. she was special, though, and it's the most beautiful cemetary i've ever seen. it's nestled right into the rolling foothills right below The Flatirons. there's an enorous hundred-year-old oak just across the gravel road from her spot. the sky always seems to be dazzling--it's colorado: nearly always sunny and clear. and lucia still makes me smile.

she's also buried beside the great poet Ed Dorn, who was a great wiseass and brilliant guy, who let me into the U of Co program after i'd initially been rejected. he lived to nearly 80. he has the verse of a stunning poem called "The Gunslinger" etched into the back of his stone (his spacing and capitalization--it's in the book that way, and on the stone):

This tapestry moves

as the morning lights up.

And they who are in it move

and love its moving

from sleep to Idea

born on the breathing

of a distant harmonium, To See

is their desire

as they wander estranged

through the lanes of the Tenders

of Objects

who implore this existence

for a plan and dance wideyed

provided with a schedule

of separated events

along the selvedge of time.

          Time does not consent.

This is morning

This is afternoon

Only celebrations concur

and we concur To See

                               The Universe

it gives me the chills every time i read it. lots of stones here and there have snatches of poetry inscribed, or prose, but nothing in a league with this. and how wonderful picturing ed, knowing he didn't just like the words, he wrote them. best thing in the cemetary.

to get to theit plots, you wind along a dirt/gravel road that loops around the perimeter of the cemetery, with little spurs down the middle. lucia and ed are right on the north edge, about halfway around, on the side of a hill. the road is rutty, with deep erosion cuts across it all over the place. in a car, it's a bumpy ride. not a great road for a scooter, so i paid close attention on the ride in. we'd been on and off the bikes nearly two hours, so i was feeling comfortable now, but playing it safe on this road.

then i lost myself in the cemetary and forgot. patrick was fun to visit with--he noticed different things than me. like all the giant stones with multiple names on them, some with two dates, many with only one. ugh. that would unnerve me, seeing a big gravestone in a cemetary with my name on it, and my birth date, waiting to fill in my death? very strange. suprisingly common. i am aware that i'm going to die, but i've never wanted a plot waiting for me, and i sure as hell don't want my gravestone made up while i'm breathing.

we had all sorts of fun, and when we hopped on the bikes, i felt a little guilty that i'd barely stopped to chat quietly with lucia. i don't do that with anyone else, just her. i'd been thinking about her the last couple days, picturing her great big smile at me for finishing my first book. she helped teach me to write. she showed me the way with her stuff. and she was the first person in my life outside my family or a girlfriend to say "i love you." that was before i accepted i was guy. gayguys say it all the time, but in straightland, it had never happened to me. she helped me figure out how to love a lot of people, especially myself. when i did something goofy she we giggle and call me darling. "oh darling, . . ."

god, i love her.

i was excited to take patrick to the spot, and to feel a little closer to her, too. but then i kinda forgot to visit with her, so at the end, i told patrick i needed a minute, and took thirty seconds, and felt i'd gyped her a little.

so we hopped on the bikes, to get back to the mountain to do our little nature hike, and i pushed back the kickstand, started rolling down the hill, gave it a little gas, and turned back to say goodbye. i completely forgot i'd first gotten on one of these things two hours ago. i looked back over my shoulder, and reached my right arm up to wave goodbye. i hit a deep rut, skidded around on the gravel, fought for control of it, got my right hand back on the handlebar and instictively braked with that hand, which is the rear brake on my mountain bike. i didn't know motorbikes are always the reverse. i had just about regained control when i clamped what turned out to be the front brake and that sent the reat wheel into the air, me coming off it and the bike pivoting around the front tire. it grounded me when the gas tank came down on my left ankle. i was twisted and pinned, but could barely reach it with my fingertips, and going for it shifted the weight and dug it in harder.

patrick was already well ahead, but three old people visiting their dead friends came running. patrick called back "are you OK?" and i was yelling, "No! Get off me! Get it off!" but he only heard me yelling and assumed i was saying i was fine. everyone always yells that they're fine. every other time i've screwed up like this, i'm yelling that i'm fine. a feeble old man who was truly about ninety years old and as many pounds got there first and pulled the bike off me with his bony little arms. patrick was running toward me and could not believe he lifted it.

it looked a lot worse at first, because my knee was scraped superficially, but a pretty big swath, so it was covered in blood and it was running down my leg and with all the grit and gravel we couldn't see if that was serious, and my hand was a little roughed up, and i must have touched me knee, so they thought that was bleeding, and i couldn't stand at first and both my knee and ankle were howling, so i wasn't sure what was wrong with me. so a lot of confusion at first. i just wanted to sit down, and headed for a big gravestone to sit on, and the old man said, "there's a bench, that's what it's there for," and i thought, "really? i can't just sit on this huge marble stone two steps away?" but i didn't want to fight about that just then, so i walked to the bench. (it was maybe just 20 steps, and by then there were four people helping me. i still wonder about gravesite etiquitte though. i think if you've been in a potentially serious accident and don't know what's wrong yet, you're allowed to sit on anything.)

they were all really nice. the little old lady cleaned up my knee, though not very well, because she was afraid of hurting me, and only had a paper napkin and her water bottle. i was trying to tell her to just dive in there and clean it hard and fast and get it over with, but too many people were talking to me at once. she was all upset that she didn't have her first aid kit. patrick and i both thought for awhile that she was saying she DID have it, and was cleaning the wound, because she kept repeating, "i just put the first aid kit in the car. i just put the first aid kit in the car." but she was lamenting that she'd put it in the OTHER car. it turned out to be a superficial wound, and the least of my problems. she was sweet, though. they all were.

the knee turned out to be no problem at all, which surprised me, because i've nailed it before a couple times and it swelled up and i couldn't walk for half a week. i must have been lucky with the angle or something. it's a minor bruise, which i'm not even noticing with the ankle. that's my only real issue.

the old folks offered to drive me back and one of them drive the scooter back, but i thought i was ok after a bit and we road them home.

so it wasn't quite the mini-vacation i had planned. i was thinking about taking the whole weekend off, which i apparently still am, but not quite as intended. no dancing tonight.

---

that was a week ago. i did not go dancing that night.

i guess i can't dance for six weeks. i might explode. i don't think i've ever gone more than 2-3 since i got out of the body cast. i start getting really antsy after two weeks. (same amount of time that going without writing gets to me, but completely different reaction. writing withdrawl makes me sour, irritable and cranky. dancing withdrawl makes me anxious, jittery and insanely restless.)

we assumed it was just a bad sprain because i could walk on it, with help and a lot of pain. we rode the scooters back across town and up the mountainside to his house. patrick took good care of me there, and gave me a pair of spare crutches from all his breaks. i iced it like crazy, but it swelled up the size of a baseball that night--like half a baseball was sticking out of my ankle. it was a rough night, so i called a doctor friend first thing this morning and he asked if i could take four steps. i tried one, and couldn't stand it, and he said get an x-ray. good advice. (FYI, he said the rule is: if the patient can't take four steps, get an x-ray.)

the ER doc didn't mince words. five minutes after the x-ray, she pulled the curtain back and said, "well, you broke your ankle." broken fibula, which is the smaller calf bone that doesn't bear most of the weight. it snapped clear through, but a clean break. the problem is the location: right at the ankle joint, which can cause trouble. she said surgery was pretty definite.

they gave me the x-rays on CD, and i blew up the spot that looked like the problem, though on the first view it just looked like a gray line, and i didn't even know if that was the problem.

it's the one on the right that's broken--the bottom chunk lopped off, and pushed slightly to the right of where it normally sits. the left is supposed to look like that: it's two separate bones, the big calve bone (tibia), on top of the foot bone, aka, the ankle. i think.

they put a great big boot on it, and i want to meet the guy or woman who designed that and thank him or her, because it's a wonderful little device. i stopped hurting the second she strapped that on. it just had to be imobilized.

the ER doc was wrong.

orthopods don't work on the weekends unless it's life or death or loss of limb, so it took till late tuesday to see a highly-rated guy who said it would probably heal on its own. the two pieces have a good fit, so best to avoid surgery. Big relief. He wants weight on it; he put a cast on. i chose royal blue. the crutches are gone, thank god. i do not want to thank the inventor of those. seems like someone can do better.

(Not my best look. Bad haircut--way too short--and goofy expression, but I did try to coordinate the cast with my shirt and eyes. Hahaha. I got the shades all wrong. Lovely house, though, huh? Not mine. It's my friend Tomny's. He and Jonny brought me to his place to watch the ghastly Sarah Palin Show Thursday night. I apologize for the fake plant. Otherwise I love the place.)

THE PLAN: three weeks in the cast, then three to five in a boot, then possible physical therapy; full recovery in three months if there's no soft tissue damage. He'll assess/address soft tissue when the cast comes off. He hopes the free ligament was due to the bone chunk that holds it in place being mobile.

Walking is slow and awkward. Ankles turn out to be important. Without flexing it, the knee takes all the heat. No pain, though, and so much better than the crutches: less tiring, less precarious balancing on stairs, and free hands. It was so complicated to only use one set of appendages at a time.They're kind of a team. And I can drive again, though perhaps not well. Patrick brought my car back from Boulder, but friends have mostly been driving me around.

I spent a week learning to be mostly self-sufficient within my apt. That was daunting and kinda scary. Friends were great, but I had to learn myself. What a relief to let go of that--and to chuck my crutches-training program. (Four blocks on Sunday, eight Monday, I was supposed to do twelve Tuesday, but waited for word from the doc. It was hard.)

Emotionally I've been up and down. Most of the time, I've been fine with it, but I've had a couple breakdowns at odd moments. Wednesday was the hardest, and least expected. I had gone to bed Tuesday night elated: the whole impending surgery ordeal was lifted, the bone was safely sealed in a pretty blue cast, the evil cruthces were retired, and I could use my arms and legs simultaneously again. I felt the whole thing lifted. But then I woke up Wednesday with this anchor still strapped to my leg. I got out of bed and it hurt like hell at first. That passed quickly (it hurts when I've been off if awhile), but reminded me I wasn't out of the woods yet. Everything reminded me of that: Walking down the hall, I take these short, stubby, peg-leg steps that take forever and . . . I have to consolidate trips and plan everything to minimize steps because I can only be on it so long, and everything takes forever . . .

It's not that bad, just a pain in the ass. I just had to regrasp the fact that some of it had passed at the orthopod's office Tuesday, and some was still with me. Just a blip in the grand scheme. People deal with much worse every day. I'm sure it will look like nothing in six weeks, or once it's fully back, but it feels heavier than I'd like right now.

Back to work. So much to do. I've been getting some work done, but not nearly enough.

---

OK, it's Sunday night now, nine days out. I'm hobbing around, getting used to it. Things are more tiring than they seem like they ought to be.

I think maybe it's emotionally draining, because I was all tired out from running errands with Alan (who graciously drove me around, carried the groceries, etc.), Friday, but took my first trip to the gym, anyway. I hought I might be REALLY dead there, but quite the reverse--really invigorating. Nice to be myself again and be able to accomplish things and do just as well as before. Or something.

Everything takes forever. But I've gotten used the stupid anchor, and trying to learn something from it. I think I have. Lots of things, though they're still settling, so I won't try to share them now. Feeling OK. Need to work.

---

(FYI, wikipedia has an entry on Lucia here): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucia_Berlin

MARCH 7, 2009 12:10PM

Friends have been telling me for years how much they hate their book tours, but that I might be the exception. I've been expecting to like mine.

I still think I will, mostly, but I got an unexpected taste this week.  I've had nine solid days of book promotion mixed with meetings, prep and other sorts of immersion, and I am totally wrung out.

None of this was intended as a dry run for the book tour, but it worked out that way. That was a highly useful side effect. The book tour starts exactly one day from yesterday, and now I know what to prepare myself for.

It looks pretty easy, getting your picture taken, or sitting in a chair answering questions, but whoa, it sucks the juice out of you.

Thursday night I got back to Denver late, and yesterday morning the videographer arrived at my apt to shoot the book trailer. He left at 8 p.m. I wanted to sleep for a week.

It's a lot like when you do a speaking engagement, or a board presentation: For me, at least, I feel pumped and full of energy while I'm doing it, because my brain keeps ordering up adrenalites, and they are surging through my bloodstream the whole time. Those are powerful little hormones, that allow you to do anything.  But that energy doesn't come out of nowhere: the hormones just order every cell to give up everything it's got stored. When you're done, you are really done.

The shoot was great, BTW. We did four separate locations--my studio, a gravesite with thirteen marble crosses, the school and the permanent memorial in Clement Park--plus the filmmaker interviewed and shot footage in the car while I drove. He said he was really happy with it, and I could tell right off he was good at his job. (Plus he spent six years working on South Park.)

(The filmmaker is Andrew Kemler. Check out his previous book trailers, including Temple Grandin's Animals make us Human.)

The timing was good, because I got to implement some of the great advice I got this week at two lunch meetings: one with my editor and publicist, another with my agent. They both said I was doing well on communicating about the book, but with one big exception: brevity. 

My blabby approach to life and stream of consciousness style is not going to work in four-minute TV interviews, or even somewhat longer TV and radio. At least it won't work as well as if I distill certain ideas into a few sentences first, and then expand on them. 

Good advice. Tough for me, but necessary. The first big test was the book trailer, because the entire thing is set to run about two to three minutes. I could use that up on one anecdote. That's not going to cut it. We need to touch on as many great aspects of the book as possible in that time. And we want to do the same in the live interviews I do later. 

It's a good challenge for me as a writer, and a lot like poetry: fierce economy of language: expressing what I have in the minimum number of words.

My agent gave  me an exercise, and it's been incredibly helpful already. She gave me a list of nine key questions about my book, and told me to come up with two-sentence answers to each. They are very broad questions, which I often take five minutes to answer. This is good. Even if I use a longer answer later, this forces me to confront the essence of my answer, and to distill it down to one core idea. 

(Betsy, my agent, wrote a brief, sweet blog post about the lunch here.)

I've got to run, but will return with more on the NYC trip, and the amazing Dart/Nieman conference at Harvard.

So much happened, I don't even know where to start.

---

REQUEST:

If you have a blog or website, please consider adding a link to my book page, with "Columbine" as the anchor text (the highlighted text they click on), so it looks like this: Columbine.

Thanks. That will help my google rank.

The page to link to is: http://davecullen.com/columbine.htm

--

Sept 7 Update:

I was a lot harder than I imagined. But quite a ride, too.

FEBRUARY 21, 2009 2:12AM

Today was a big day in my career. I have literally gone to sleep hundreds of times fantasizing about Publisher's Weekly reviewing my book, and giving it a starred review.

Today it happened. Woohoo! My editor is ecstatic. Me, too. Most of my friends are confused. My family, too. They tried to cheer me up for getting only one star. 

I forgot that most of the world has never heard of the weird book-industry lingo. Here's the primer:

There are four major trade journals, that review books weeks ahead of publication: as a guide for editors of the books sections at newspapers and magazines, booking agents for TV shows, booksellers, Hollywood scouts, etc. The most important, by far, is Publisher's Weekly, or PW.

(Good Slate piece about how the trades work from 2003 here.)

They all use the same system, which is entirely different than the four-star movie system. With books, most get a one-paragraph review, with no stars. A few get a star.

That's their top honor, and there's an actual pink star printed on top of it. (The star below is the actual gif from the PW website.) There is no such thing as multiple stars in their world. Their definition which I found online and I think matches what I've seen in the print version of the mag is:

"A starred review indicates a book of outstanding quality."

Getting a starred review can really help a book take off, though they probably have less influence than they used to with buzz, but much more influence via Amazon and B&N online. Both of those signed agreements with PW, so that the first review shown for every book on Amazon is PW's. (I'm not sure about the B&N arrangement, but I think it's similar. Of course it only applies to books PW reviewed, but that's all major books.) That gives the PW assessment tremendous clout in online sales, which now account for about a quarter of the total book market.

So I'm happy. Extremely.

I was going to just post the damn review with the news this morning, but luckily I had to run out and got to people via cellphone first, and realized I'd just draw more condolences. LOL. I hope this helps clear up confusion.

It doesn't seem to be online yet, but it will be soon. Meantime, here's the entire review (they're always this short): 

Columbine
Dave Cullen. Twelve, $26.99 (432) ISBN 978-0-446-54693-5

In this remarkable account of the April 20, 1999, Columbine High School shooting, journalist Cullen not only dispels several of the prevailing myths about the event but tackles the hardest question of all: why did it happen? Drawing on extensive interviews, police reports and his own reporting, Cullen meticulously pieces together what happened when 18-year-old Eric Harris and 17-year-old Dylan Klebold killed 13 people before turning their guns on themselves. The media spin was that specific students, namely jocks, were targeted and that Dylan and Eric were members of the Trench Coat Mafia. According to Cullen, they lived apparently normal lives, but under the surface lay “an angry, erratic depressive” (Klebold) and “a sadistic psychopath” (Harris), together forming a “combustible pair.” They planned the massacre for a year, outlining their intentions for massive carnage in extensive journals and video diaries. Cullen expertly balances the psychological analysis—enhanced by several of the nation’s leading experts on psychopathology—with an examination of the shooting’s effects on survivors, victims’ families and the Columbine community. Readers will come away from Cullen’s unflinching account with a deeper understanding of what drove these boys to kill, even if the answers aren’t easy to stomach. (Apr. 6)

---

This might also be a good time to announce that Barnes & Noble selected Columbine for its "Discover Great New Writers" program.  So the book will be featured in a special section in the front of every B&N store in the country, and singled out on its web site, featured in its print flyers and emails. They have an editorial committee which only pick a handful of books a month, and it really helps launch a book.

Borders has also really gotten behind the book, so my publisher added four extra tour dates for their stores in Colorado. (I'll now do an east coast leg, a west coast leg, and a Colorado leg.) I'll have the east coast dates on my website soon.

East coast and Denver events include:

• Denver: Tattered Cover LoDo, April 7, 7:30 p.m.
• NYC: B&N at Broadway & 82nd, April 13, 7 p.m.
• DC: Politics & Prose, April 15, 7 p.m.*
• Miami: Books & Books, April 16, 7 p.m.

Please RSVP at the Facebook event page for Tattered Cover. I'll get invites up on Facebook for the others, soon.

I may be on your local radio April 14. I'll be doing a national satellite tour of 20 cities, back to back over the course of six hours. They will have the option of airing it live, or using it later, most likely on the tenth anniversary of Columbine, April 20.

National TV is getting booked and several big national mags are on board, but I can't discuss them until right before they air/publish. I'll let you know when they do, though. I'll have everything on my website, and will try to post here and lots of quickies on my facebook and twitter pages during the book tour.

I finally got my iphone last night, which will make that much easier. (Thank you all you OS Mac fanatics who pushed me over the hump. You really did. And I LOVE it BTW, even more than I expected to. Much more. It really is a little gift from God.)

Of course none of these gigs are booking themselves. The best thing I have going for me is the team at Twelve: a great editor, Jonathan Karp, and a brilliant publicist who is working his ass off, Cary Goldstein.

I finally get to meet them in person a week from Tuesday. I was invited to the Nieman Center's Aftermath conference at Harvard next weekend, and from there, I'm doing four days in NYC, for a whole lot of pre-launch publicity stuff.

I'm finally going to tour the Hachette building on Park Avenue and meet all the wonderful people who worked on this book. You would not believe how many it takes. They have been so good to me: but all by phone and a zillion emails. It will be nice to see them.

Then Jon and Cary are taking me to my first official author lunch. Just like in my dreams.

---

* For anyone in DC, my Slate editor (now Editor In Chief there), David Plotz has a new book out, Good Book: The Bizarre, Hilarious, Disturbing, Marvelous, and Inspiring Things I Learned When I Read Every Single Word of the Bible and will be at Politics & Prose March 7. (Click for details on Facebook.) He's a really bright guy and a great writer. 

FEBRUARY 19, 2009 2:04AM

How did I miss The Gaslight Anthem this long?

After that wrenching but wonderful experience with "The '59 Sound," I downloaded a bunch of their stuff and it's been glorious. I listen to it at the gym, and nothing pumps me like they do. It makes me smile, too.

 At first, I thought a lot of it sounded too much alike, but oddly, it's gotten better with repeats. They are clever lyricists, they have a ball--check out the video--and most importantly, they mean it.

Somehow, I continued to overlook "Ida Called You Woody, Joe," my new almost-favorite. (Video below. Lyrics and great insights about them here.)

I paid no attention to the clunky title, hit play and they blast right into it, with the singer taken by another song:

I felt my fingertips tingle, and it started to rain
When the walls of my bedroom were tremblin' around me . . .

. . . and then there's this really familiar chord progression and Brian Fallon sings, "

And this was the sound, of the very last gang in town.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. He's listening to Joe Strummer. "Last Gang in Town" was a great Clash song. My favorite group ever. Joe was singer, songwriter, and rhythm guitarist. (I had to look this up, but he loved Woody Guthrie so much he called himself Woody, for awhile--while he was a young pretentious dork, I guess. Hahaha. That didn't last. He was wonderful.)

The next line, how freaking wonderful:

As heard by my wild young heart,
Like directions on a cold, dark night,
Sayin', "Let it out, let it out, let it out, you're doing all right."

Nice. That's how I heard Joe, too. How many punkers write lyrics that tender?

And how cool for the Gaslight guys to still have wild young hearts, but the wisdom, too, already to see that's how they're absorbing it. How do he know?

One of my favorite Clash-kinda images was actually from the other guy, Mick Jones, in his followup band, Big Audio Dynamite:

I`d wish I could`ve seen you
When you could run wild
I would`ve liked to know you
As an innocent child

I think about so many people when I hear that, including Mick himself, and Joe Strummer. I never saw them play together. They never toured the Midwest once I discovered them in 1979. I saw Mick with Big Audio Dynamite, but the show was lame. I don't care. I still love them.

And I love that The Gaslight Anthem wrote this song for Joe, who died in 2002, unexpectedly of an undiagnosed heart ailment.

This part is sweet:

And I carried these songs as a comfort wherever I'd go.
. . . And I never got to tell him, so I just wrote it down.
I wrapped a couple chords around it and I let it come out . . .

Punkers with heart. Just like Joe.

FEBRUARY 17, 2009 1:21AM

A friend just had a baby, and I was empathizing by email about the call of an angry infant with a full diaper or empty belly. I've never had a kid, but  a few years as indentured servant in a Catholic family of nine kids gave me a taste.

Everyone was sucked into diaper and bottle duty--though  never getting up at night, thank God. Sleep loss if probably the worst of it, and my parents graciously spared us that.

It's a pretty efficient system, outsourcing the shitwork to the older siblings, but with a few downsides. My youngest sister, Mrs' Che (pronounced miSEZ' che--what we call her) was dropped three times.

I can't remember them all, but one sticks. She was an infant; my younger brother, who would have been eight, was tasked with bringing her in from the car. He pulled her out, then decided to attend to something else for a sec. So he set her on the car roof--not the hood, the roof over the seats.

She rolled right off. She wasn't old enough to sit up straight yet--she had one of those rocker chairs we put her in to support her back. He knew that, didn't stop to consider it.

The driveway was concrete. She howled when she hit, but babies are conveniently composed of mostly fat and water. They don't quite bounce, but close.

I wouldn't recommend dropping one, but they seem to tolerate it remarkably well.  No permanent damage, except for every possible situation we could make fun of her for later, and blame on the droppings, which we assured her would mar her for life.

My friend should be OK. Adults tend to be more careful.

FEBRUARY 17, 2009 12:46AM

A member posted this on my web forum this week, in the Amazing Race thread: "Once again, you cannot really tell if one is going to like
any of these couples. "

What an odd way to put it. He was apparently torn between using the second person and whatever person-number "one" is (still second, but passive?)

I find either one slightly offensive: maybe you can't tell, but how did you decide I can't?

I'm hearing way more of it the past few years than I ever remember. 

It's grown nearly ubiquitous among victim interviews after tragedies like plane crashes. You can lay money that on any network newscast, close to half the survivors will slip into statements like "when you hear the crash, you think blah blah blah, and you blah blah blah . . ."

Once they get to second person, they tend to stay there, straight through.

It's really hard to criticize the victim or survivor of a tragedy--is that why no one ever speaks up about this? Or is it really not bugging anyone else.

I immediately recoil at the notion that they know how I would think or act in that situation--or how anyone else will. I am most offended by the inherent idea of a universal response. My experience is pretty much the opposite. I'm willing to bet that of two hundred people on the plane, there were fewer than 200 different responses, but at least a dozen wildly different reactions. Of the four people in front, back and either side of the witness, I bet at least one or two of them was having a completely different experience.

So tell your experience, I'd love to hear it. But don't paste it onto everyone else.

And don't tell me when I'm ready to pick a favorite on The Amazing Race. 

I haven't picked a favorite yet, BTW, so he was right on that count. But I still want to decide when I'm ready.

That's all.

FEBRUARY 16, 2009 4:42PM

I just watched Glen Campbell perform "Rhinestone Cowboy" on (Friday's?) Craig Ferguson.

(Older live version from youtube):

That was always a guilty pleasure of mine. Still is, apparently. The whole idea is a little cheesy, but it's told/sung with such sincerity, and such relish, I can't resist it.

And how can I resist lines like, "I'll dream of the things I'll do / With a subway token and a dollar tucked inside my shoe"?

Glen was/is a real talent, I think. "Witchita Linesmen" makes me ache. He's got a bunch. 

He's got a greatest hits CD out. I might actually buy it.

FEBRUARY 16, 2009 1:06PM

Man. My editor (Jon) always seems to have an amazing email to start me off Monday mornings. I wonder if he saves them up till then.

I thought I got to return the favor this week, but he trumped me. I got a really nice email over the weekend, and forwarded it to Jon yesterday, but he had a better one for me when I got up.

I pasted them below, with the names of the writers abbreviated, and the even nicer letter second. (I snipped a few words out of the second one because they're spoilers. I don't want to start giving away plot developments to OS regulars--you might want to experience those yourself.)

BTW, if you ever really like a book, or a song or TV show or whatever, and wish you could tell the guy or the woman or the people what it did for you, for God's sake,act on that urge.

I always figure famous people are already deluged, and they probably are, but you can never get enough validation. At least I can't. I have a feeling a lot of people who go into the arts are that way. And the less famous and non-famous can probably really use it. I'm going to go looking for an address for Dimitri Martin. I can actually send one on myspace.

Anyway, the letters I just got. For me, they made the ten years worth it:

Dave -

As I'm currently working at a Barnes & Noble I was able to receive and read an advance copy of Columbine. Aside from being immensely readable and completely absorbing (I plowed through it in just a couple days), I think you've written an important account, not just of the massacre, but the impact on victims, families, law enforcement, the community, religious leaders (and opportunists), the media, and indeed the country as a whole. I was amazed that so much of what I knew about the tragedy was based on a mythology that was set in motion almost immediately after the attack, and allowed to remain in place for, well, a decade now.

By revealing the true nature of the event and its aftermath you've provided an accurate record of a complex story that needed to be told truthfully so that genuine understanding can be achieved, and as a result real change effected. It touched me, it moved me, and it scared me. It's a magnificent piece of work.

Ten years well spent, man.

David H.

Dear Mr. Karp -

I am a bookseller at a wonderful independent bookstore in Massachusetts.  I have been captivated by many of the books you have published, particularly TITANIC'S LAST SECRETS and GIANTS.  Thank you for producing works of such singular quality and relevance.  I look forward to reading many of your upcoming releases.  I am grateful to our store's enthusiastic and responsive rep, Roger Saginario.  He was most accommodating (as always) when I requested an early copy of Dave Cullen's COLUMBINE.  I feel compelled to offer some feedback on this unforgettable book.

COLUMBINE is perhaps the most haunting book I've ever read. During the week or so that I was reading the book, the events of that horrible day came to mind with surprising frequency; I found myself talking about the book often to friends and colleagues.  I typically read lighter fare.  Sadly, this is not the product of some Hollywood screenwriter's vivid imagination; COLUMBINE is all too true.

Cullen's compelling book is amazingly thorough.  The grim day is recounted with gruesome clarity.  The many controversies are effectively related: the response of law enforcement teams, the crosses for the dead, the lawsuits, Cassie Bernall's profession of faith, and so much more.  Forgotten bits of the story are supplied.  I was horrified to read that Anne Marie Hochhalter's . . .  Cullen's exhaustive research also leads to fascinating updates on how many of the survivors are faring a decade later.  Readers will cheer again for . . . as they read of his improbable victories.  And, Mr. Cullen gets as close as anyone could to fleshing out the killers' reasons for their rampage.

I was quite moved by this book.  I find myself making efforts to be a kinder person, hoping somehow that tiny individual efforts might cancel out the evil of those rare haters among us.  Cullen's book also reminds me that our schools, small reflections of our larger society, are wellsprings of goodness, brimming with unlimited potential.  We must nurture them.

I predict (and hope for) big success for this book. Both as a reader and a bookseller, I look forward to its publication.  I will do all I can to get this book into the hands of as many readers as possible.  Thank you!  Please continue to publish wonderfully important books.  Finally, thanks for taking the time to read this too-long missive.

Gratefully,

Christopher R.

Andover Bookstore
Andover, MA 01810

---

(From Dave again):

That second one. I teared up when I got to the part about  the tiny individual efforts to be a better person. That's way more than I had hoped. I only hope it lasts. 

Now I'm so glad I spent the ten years. (Not that it's all I did during the ten years--I don't want to overstate that--but it was the bulk.)

The thing is, during the ten years, I never knew whether I was actually going to get a book done, and I definitely didn't expect to land a publisher like Twelve, or to get this kind of a launch. Things have fallen into place amazingly well. I'm giddy almost every day. (Except when my car gets robbed or I get a frustrating prognosis on my back condition.)

I still don't want to spend ten years on the next one, though. Hahaha.

FEBRUARY 14, 2009 5:45PM

This is how cheap I am:

I just unscrewed the three-way bulb that was annoying the hell out of me, because the 50-watt filament had burned out.

(It's in my living room, and I'm only supposed to have dim light at night. It's key to sleeping better. True. Dim bulbs can be annoying as hell in humans, but quite functional in lamps.*

So I put a new three-way bulb in, and put the partially-burnt out one back in the cardboard holder, wrote 100 watts left on a post it, taped it on and put it back in the drawer with spare bulbs.

I've done this a million times, but for some reason, today I wondered, "Do other people do this?"

Hehehe.

Got to save money on bulbs so I can buy that iphone.

---

* post script:

I used to have every lamp on dimmer switches, but I blew about ten fuses installing them, including blowing power to the entire building twice. Then the super agreed to install all the rest for me. Hahaha. I felt like kind of an ass, but he offered to do any other electrical work I needed for free if I agreed not to attempt it myself. So when I moved, I never tried again. That was about nine years ago. Maybe when I decide to put down roots.)

FEBRUARY 14, 2009 3:03AM

One month, three weeks and two days till publication day, and I'm already checking my Amazon rank once a day. Only on good days, actually--when it tanks, I don't check it for awhile.

Today I broke 10,000 for the first time: woohoo!

Amazon.com Sales Rank: #9,905 in Books (See Bestsellers in Books)

Popular in these categories: (What's this?)

#2 in  Books > History > United States > State & Local > West#9 in  Books > History > United States > 20th Century > 1945 - Present#16 in  Books > Nonfiction > True Accounts > Murder & Mayhem

And I hit the top ten in a couple categories, though, I doubt they're actually selling a whole lot of those Western books. (Still, I can't wait to knock over that John Muir book I've never heard of. Hahaha.)

That True Crime category, though, that's big. Those books sell, and there are some bestsellers and classics at/near the top, like In Cold Blood, Devil In The White City, Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil . . . 

I wish they actually called it True Crime instead of Murder & Mayhem, though. That's an accurate category title, but kind of unseemly to mention to people. I do not want to brag about that title. Even if/when I do pass In Cold Blood. 

If I understand the significance of all this--and I'm not at all sure I do--the most important number there is making the top 25 on the murder/mayhem list. They list 25 per page. Most people won't click to the second page.  I've learned about google that it's much more important to be on the first page than where you are on it. Presumably,  most people scanning that page will know all about In Cold Blood and Helter Skelter, but will be surprised to discover a book on Columbine, and may click over to read more and buy it.

Our main goal at this point it to raise awareness that it's out there. And the people scanning that page are not likely to be put off by the subject matter.

Hennyway, I was very relieved a few years back to discover everyone  obsesses over their rank. My Slate editor is/was a very big deal, and when his first book came out I thought he'd be above it. Nope. I emailed asking, and he said something like every five minutes. He could not stop himself.

And Frank Rich's book debuted at #1 on the NY Times list, but that first week, I gave it a good review on Amazon and it poste while he happened to be taping Colbert/ An hour later, he emailed thanking me. And I laughed my ass off: Near as I can tell, he went right home from the studio and checked his Amazon rank, and/or new user reviews. 

So I feel OK about it. I would do it exactly the same regardless, but this way I feel OK about it.

And thank you whoever you people are who are ordering it. I got mentioned in two newspaper columns this week: that was probably most of it, and temporary. 

But it makes me smile. I had a hard morning, so I was ready for a smile.

FEBRUARY 12, 2009 7:11PM

I'm on the verge of shelling out for an iphone. (And today I actually got excited about Twittering upon it.)

I actually looked around for an Apple phone while I was downtown for PT today. If a store had materialized, I would prolly own one now.

Somehow, AT&T seemed to realize this, or more likely, in an incredible  coincidence, they called me an hour later, pitching a new phone.

They have this Samsung Eternity phone on sale for $156, which they claim is equal to the Iphone in every way, for a few hundred less. (And also much less per month.)

I've heard many times in the past that even Apple's best products, like the Ipod are tpically done better (more reliable) for a lot less money, by competitors.

Should I go for the cheapie? Or will I regret it? $350 is a lot of money to me.

I'm sure you Apple lovers will have a few opinions. God knows you did on my laptop question. In that case, I was not swayed by the Mac chorus, but I know PCs very well, and had already selected a model there, just had a question on timing. Here I'm wide open to opinions. I don't know shit. Enlighten me.

---

Sept 7 update:

Damn, getting that thing was the best thing I ever did.

FEBRUARY 12, 2009 1:33PM

I might be mildly embarrassed. I can't decide how to feel.

But I think I'm starting to like Twitter. 

I enjoy Facebook a lot, and OS, and my own little blog I started on the once-might Salon Blogs when it opened about (seven?) years ago.

But Twitter? It's nothing but these little 140-character-max updates. No room for anything of substance. Seemed totally retarded.

It also seemed like regression: back to the earliest blogs and personal websites in the '90s, where you informed everyone about important issues like your lunch menu and when you were heading to the bathroom.

But my publisher insisted it was freaking awesome, and a few friends have been insisting how much they enjoy it, so  joined in early January, and the past week, I've actually gotten active on it.

And I think I like it. 

It turns out I have all sorts of little ruminations and minor amusements throughout the day that are insufficient to blog about, or even call a friend or pound out an email. I'm starting to toss them onto Twitter. 

It takes a little training. At first, I posted really lame stuff, just to make myself post something. It took about three days to warm up to the point where I was getting the urge at the right time: where the thought went off, that "Hey, Twit that." (The "correct" verb is apparently tweet. No thank you.)

So I'm not posting my bathroom breaks. I am ruminating about all this PT and body-repair I'm going to. It feels like a full-time job, almost, fixing all these beat-up bodyparts.

I don't think I've actually done that well yet.If you visit my twits, I doubt you'll get a clear sense of that. But I'm getting there.

I'm not yet convinced anyone wants to read my stuff there. I'm not convinced I want to read much from others. But that's OK, I guess. There are writers and there are readers and there are people who enjoy both.I don't swing both ways on that one.

So I'll keep twittering whether anyone shows up or not.

FEBRUARY 11, 2009 12:18PM

FEBRUARY 11, 2009 11:41AM

Simon Baker has rarely done much chat TV, but he was on Leno Monday night: adorable and endearing, though the guy cannot tell an anecdote.

He told about five, and they all tanked: good start, but they peter out. He can tell a beginning and a middle, but no ending.

Of course neither can Jay, and he does it for a living.

Try his first story in this second half of the interview, after the commercial break (the first clip takes you to the break):

It was great to hear him speak Australian, though.

But he didn't quite seem the sexiest man alive anymore. I like my sexy smart, and snappy. And stunning how much smaller he looked, less commanding presence. I guess the Mentalist team really knows how to shoot him.

But the smile was still great.

So here's the thing:

 I watched The Mentalist last night, and it was hard to concentrate. It didn't seem like the "real" him or something. He seemed kind of smaller--I knew he wasn't really that commanding. Or that he didn't talk that way?

Strange. It's not like I've never seen an actor on a talk show before. Maybe because I've lost interest in him, kinda?  (Just a little. But enough for a big dent.)

Temporary, probably.

I'm not sure.

I still enjoyed the show, though, especially for writing like this:

"Do you have any good clothes?"

"I'm wearing them."

"Ehhhhhh . . ."

Hehehehe. Even better delivery. 

--

Sept 7 Update:

I never did regain interest in the show too much after that. I kept expecting to, but they just kept piling up on my tivo. I eventually watched them all, but with nothing approaching my earlier joy.

Some of that was probably coincidence: the novelty of the show wearing off. Some.

FEBRUARY 9, 2009 6:49PM

The Kindle 2 was unveiled today.

It's thinner, lighter, the battery lasts longer and it flips the pages faster. The resolution is a bit crisper, 16 shades of gray vs. 4. (Review here.)

It all looks great, except for the one fatal flaw with the Kindle 1: the screen is way too small. The press release doesn't mention it, but it appears to be roughly the same size. It's also still way too expensive.

I tried a friend's Kindle 1 and hated having a paragraph or two at a time instead of the whole page. Maybe I'd get used to it. I doubt it.

I think the main thing holding back ebooks is they have to meet and beat all the key aspects of the reading experience.  Only techhounds (and people with specific circumstances, like reading a lot of books at once) are going to swap to a new way of reading that is almost as good as the old way. 

It needs to be the size of a book, except thinner, preferably. It's perfect there, as thin as a magazine. It needs to be lighter than a paperback, so it feels similar in your hand, but better, easy to hold up hours of reading. It's a winner there, too: 10.2 ounces. 

Most importantly, it needs to be as easy to read as a book. The Kindle 1 was in the ballpark, but not there. I'll have to see the new one in person to evaluate. (Anyone here held one yet?)

 And every page needs to be as rewarding as a book page. Major bomb there. The screen is about 1/3 the size of a book. Completely unacceptable. (And there's all sorts of wasted space.) 

I'm not sure what it is about having more available, but it's important for the pleasure of the experience. Jeff Bezoz's team seems to have put that one through the rationality test, figured out that you can only scan a few lines at a time anyway, so it makes no difference. Wrong. Imagine a book fed to you one line at a time. Ugh. 

Perhaps it's just the conditioning of hundreds of years of a book page holding a certain amount of info. Regardless, we've been conditioned.

Otherwise, there seems to be a lot to love. But not enough for mass market yet, I'd say. Make it like a book, people.

As a writer, I've been excited about ebooks for years. I expect and hope the printed book to stay around in some form for most of my life, but I believe that once publishers make reading easier and cheaper and more available, they can bring a lot more people into the reading fold. 

(Half the cover price of a book goes to the retailer, and another big chunk goes to printing, shipping and warehousing. Ebooks allow the writer and publisher to make as much money per copy at about 1/3 of the cover price--or, as is actually happening, somewhat less money per copy, but at a much lower price to the consumer. If ebooks eventually all sell for $10, we'll sell a hell of a lot more books. That's good for everyone.)

Which brings me to the price. One of the best long-term features of the ebook is how it will allow books to be priced reasonably. Yet here we have a huge economic barrier standing in the way of the whole revolution: $359 for the device

$359? Come on. If they want this thing to take off, it needs to be under $100. They need to bite the bullet on some up-front costs and make it happen.

---

Update: Thanks to Saturn Smith for word on Plastic Logic's really big ebook device. I love the way they're thinking.

FEBRUARY 9, 2009 5:58PM

"Brace yourselves:" a column  in today's Westword, begins: "The tenth anniversary of the attack on Columbine High School arrives this April -- and it will be accompanied by a media avalanche that will hopefully add enough perspective about these horrific events to at least partially offset the pain many locals will feel at being forced to relive one of the grimmest periods in metro Denver's history."

Westword is Denver's alt weekly, and Michael Roberts is the leading media critic in town. The deluge will be a lot stronger and more sustained here. But you'll get your share, too, if you're in earshot of this blog. 

Hopefully he's right and some of that coverage will  lead to real understanding. And of course I'm hoping it will direct some people toward my book. I'm grateful to Michael for the second sentence and what followed:

"The book likely to receive the most attention is Columbine by Dave Cullen, a local author whose writings about the killings have appeared in Salon and other nationally known media outlets. The tome is being issued by Twelve Books, an innovative, and relatively new, publishing company that puts out one book per month, thereby allowing the firm to put all of its resources behind a single project. Christopher Buckley's Supreme Courtship is among the house's success stories thus far -- and it's already contracted with ailing senator Ted Kennedy to publish his autobiography."

(Unfotunately, they pictured a locally-produced and distributed book also coming out, but you can't have everything. And hopefully his book will do well, and shed some light, too. I have not seen a copy yet.)

I think this is officially the first news or feature story to appear about my book. I'll try to avoid posting about all of them. LOL.

FEBRUARY 9, 2009 5:45PM

I bought that HP laptop with the 18.4 screen that I was mulling back here.

I was sure I wanted the largest screen possible, but when I pulled it out of the box, I thought I might have gone too far this time. It's gigantic.

It's almost exactly the size of two sheets of letter paper pasted side by side. (So once you flip it open, it's like four sheets.) It won't fit in my jumbo compter bag, or my backpack. Not even close. 

And when I set it on my lap, it felt like a ridiculous thing to have on your lap. I felt like I was a starfleet commander on the bridge of the Enterprise or something. 

(Or opening up a baby grand piano and setting it on your lap?)

It took me about a week to get used to. Now, I can't imagine what I thought the problem was. If they could make a lightweight baby grand that I could support on my lap, and I played the piano, why would I settle for something inferior on my lap when I could have the real thing.

The screen is gigantic: nearly as big as my 20-inch flatscreen desktop, which I always thought was huge. Both of them allow me to have two pages of a Word doc open side by side, or all sorts of windows. I really love it. 

I have not had to cart it around yet. That may get annoying. But I think it will be worth it, because I love having the whole damn thing here when I want it.

Everyone should have one.

(I know, not everyone. Most of you would prefer life light and easily mobile. I'd rather hump it and have the tools I want. Everyone like me should have one.)

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

I'm skeptical about remixes, but this one is brilliant.  The music, the timing, the images . . . all perfect. (And wait for the cameo. I won't spoil it.)

Remixes are often one-note, and get old very fast, but this keeps building and gets better as it goes. And it wisely ends with us wanting more, at 2:46.

It's by LA composer RevoLucian.

I also enjoyed VSL's summary of the event:

Bale’s outburst took place last summer, during the filming of Terminator Salvation. It was directed at cinematographer Shane Hurlbut (who’d committed the sin of walking into the actor’s sight line), reportedly just days before Bale’s mother and sister filed a complaint against him with cops in England.

Enjoy the video. It's nice to see something good come out of an incident so vile.

---

Meanwhile, I'm kind of appalled at the number of people sticking up for Bale, even if it's the minority. That view seems to be that he was an artist working, and distracting him was a major offense. Huh? I'm an artist, working, and I hate distractions, too. But if blow up like he did for the first ten seconds, I'm a jerk. If I keep it up for five minutes, I'm one of the biggest assholes alive.

Who else gets deferred to like that? Actors and their work are so precious that they're allowed to treat others like shit if they're annoyed?

Hero-worship in this country is out of control.

 ---

 BTW, if you don't know VSL, they feature one book, film, song, or other pop culture artifact per day. They choose GREAT stuff. You can always find a link in my blogroll to the left.

FEBRUARY 7, 2009 12:55PM

The shitty part about a new laptop is loading all your old stuff--it didn't even come with a google toolbar.

The good part is having to load those things, and using the opportunity to wander a bit and discover all the new shit people like google have come up with.

Like Google Calendar. (Go to Google and click on the "More" tab up top.)

Why did I wait this long?

The problem with my old calendar app was that it never remembered any of my defaults (like when/if to remind me by email and text), and was annoyingly slow to add events. It only took a minute or less, but I knew it could be a third of that, and it was frustrating. (Plus, I had to log into the site first.)

So I never entered most of my stuff. That's a deal breaker.

The google calendar is almost exactly the way I would have designed it. Everything I could think of to automate is. I did one Settings run-through and now all my events are created that way by default, but are easily changeable, too. It's fast as hell, and I can just keep the calendar window open all the time--or get there with one click, no login.

I love google.

FEBRUARY 7, 2009 1:06PM

I got my first prepublication review for COLUMBINE this week. It's from Kirkus Reviews (2/15).

Most of it is glowing, with a few jabs. I agreed with my publicist that I would post only his edited version:

Comprehensive, myth-busting examination of the Colorado high-school massacre . . .

“We remember Columbine as a pair of outcast Goths from the Trench Coat Mafia snapping and tearing through their high school hunting down jocks to settle a long-running feud. Almost none of that happened,” writes Cullen, a Denver-based journalist who has spent the past ten years investigating the 1999 attack. In fact, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold conceived of their act not as a targeted school shooting but as an elaborate three-part act of terrorism . . . Drawing on a wealth of journals, videotapes, police reports and personal interviews, Cullen sketches multifaceted portraits of the killers and the surviving community. He portrays Harris as a calculating, egocentric psychopath, someone who labeled his journal “The Book of God” and harbored fantasies of exterminating the entire human race. In contrast, Klebold was a suicidal depressive, prone to fits of rage and extreme self-loathing. Together they forged a combustible and unequal alliance, with Harris channeling Klebold’s frustration and anger into his sadistic plans . . . Poignant sections devoted to the survivors probe the myriad ways that individuals cope with grief and struggle to interpret and make sense of tragedy . . .  

Carefully researched and chilling.
 
---
 
Cary, my publicist, also sent out a press release with the following, including confirmed tour dates:

---

Several prominent national magazines are currently scheduled to feature the book. 
 
---

Dave’s book tour is still coming together, but so far includes the following (all events in evening):

• April 7—Tattered Cover, Denver, LoDo (16th St. @ Wynkoop), 7:30 p.m.
• April 13—Barnes & Noble, Upper West Side, Broadway @ 82nd Street, NYC
• April 15—Politics & Prose, Washington DC
• April 16 & 17—Books & Books, Coral Gables, FL
  (one event at the store, another at a school with teachers, parents and students)
• April 27—University Bookstore, Seattle
• April 29—Books, Inc., San Francisco

April: Borders has just scheduled four more events around Colorado. These four are tentative, with dates and locations awaiting final confirmation:

• April 8th at Park Meadows (8557 Park Meadow Center)
• April 9th at Northglenn (241 W 104th St)
• April 10th at Boulder (1750 29th St)
• April 21st at Colorado Springs (2120 Southgate Rd)

Memorial event in Littleton, CO (possible).
 
Events may also be scheduled in Los Angeles and Portland, as well as additional events in Colorado.

FEBRUARY 2, 2009 3:32PM

 

 Sounds like a simple request, but where do you address these things? God? The police? My facebook page? None of that seems to help.

I've tried really hard to be a good boy--perhaps He'll grant me one. He's been known to smite people, but I don't think He takes requests on that. Seriously, though, I rarely feel the vindictive urge, but I would love to see them smote right now. I can't imagine they're contributing to society much.

So it happened Thursday night, I guess--a much milder replay of my car break-in from two weeks earlier, though this time, it really hacked me off.  I've mentioned that I've been riding such a wave of great developments on my book that I didn't even get in a bad mood over the earlier break-in. It just couldn't get me down.

I still have not even reported it the first one, much less gotten anything fixed. Just couldn't quite bear to deal with it. I guess I was afraid all the annoyance of the calls and estimates and so forth would bring me down.

So this time they widened the hole in the broken window (what was the purpose of that?) and tossed all the worthless crap around again looking for something. (See inset picture for the old view. The big pic is the latest.)

This time, they got almost nothing. They left all the same stuff, including the black olives that I still have not brought in. But I was having a worse week, and the prospect of it continuing out in to the future was too much.

Also, I was/am really frustrated with myself, because I think I left my Discover card and Sam's Club card (which is also a credit card) in the car. I was being careful about having nothing in the car, but I was supposed to stop by Sam's on the way home from the gym, so I put both in my car compartment while I go in. I ran long and didn't make it to Sam's, but forgot to take the cards out and into the apt when I got home. That was the night they struck again. Damn!

I'm glad I didn't get it fixed, at least. Last night, they busted the whole a bit wider--(why was that necessary?) and went in to check for more.

The worst part is that they found the cards, so now they'll assume I'll keep being a ripe target and keep returning. Ugh. (A few summers ago, I was hit three times over the course of about a month.)

The inconsiderate bastards once again left a door ajar, so the dome light stayed on and the battery died. (That perplexed me for awhile, but I think they were trying to avoid slamming it to be quiet.)

Here's the odd detail I don't get. They locked the door with the smashed window when they were done. The only unlocked door was the opposite rear door that was left ajar. And they went into the front seat to get the credit cards. They might have climbed over the seats, but it would have been easier to unlock the front door and go in that way. If they did, they locked it when they were done. How odd. Any theories?

A friend also suggested that with the dome light on and a broken window for half the night, other passersby might have been drawn to it and gone through my car as well.  

So there was more frustrationg because I got a friend to jump it when I discovered Friday evening as I went to the gym. That was no biggie, but I thought driving to the gym would recharge it and I'd be fine. It was nearly dead when I came out two hours later. God.

It was 8:30 p.m. in the gym parking garage. I called a friend, who wasn't home, and I didn't want to bug the guy at the front desk. I thought about other friends, but didn't want to bother them.

I decided to wait for someone to come out. The first guy said no, he was in a hurry. The next guy who drove up saw me lurking, maybe thought I was a panhandler, and stayed in his car, waiting me out. I moved to the stairwell door, to wait for the next person to exit, or at least the next guy.

A woman came out, and at first I let her pass, then thought What difference does it make?--forgetting, in my frazzled state why it makes a difference. She said yes, but looked nervous and I immediately regretted asking her.

As she pulled her car up, I was sure she was afraid this might be a set-up to mug her or something. I saw the broken window, which I had not explained, and she would notice. Lots of danger signs. Maybe I was trying to steal the car? Although that would make me the world's dumbest car theif: stealing a beat-up 18-year-old car that wouldn't run, and getting help from a witness to get it out of there.

I decided assuring her that I was not a mugger or theif would only add to the impression that I was. I considered telling her to never mind and I'd wait for a guy, but that might just insult her more.

She pulled up, plainly nervous, and stayed in her car, with the doors locked. She wasn't sure how to get the hood open. I motioned for a release under the dash somewhere, and tried to describe through the window she opened a crack. She found it, I got it up, and attached everything as fast as I  could. I've done it so many times, I finally know the correct order.

I got us both on our way quickly. She smiled and drove off.

I was still agitated that the car might continue to fail. And I next planned to use it to go out clubbing Saturday night. That would be great to find it dead at 2 a.m., leaving the club, in a bad part of town.

I don't know what the hell caused the failure in the gym, but it didn't repeat. And oddly, no one charged anything on either credit card. Isn't that what they were after? They left open the compartment where I keep them, and they again left my membership card for the bathhouse, though it's still expired.

(It's possible that the "stolen" cards are actually in my apt somewhere, though I spent 40 minutes searching the damn place.) Sam's was really annoying, because on the phone they said I could get a new card at the store and shop immediately, but the damn woman at the desk insisted my credit was cancelled and I had to reapply, and was then rejected. Huh? So I couldn't get groceries, because they only take Discover and their own card. (I forgot that you can actually use cash for groceries, and I had enough in my wallet for the essentials.)

It's all little crap, nothing major, but this time it's getting to me. Plus, all the decisions about what to do.

I've sort of gotten used to no music or NPR, though I miss it a lot.  And we've had this incredible weather where it's been over 70 and in the 60s more than half the time, and no rain, so the big hole has been no issue. We had a few short cold snaps, where it was really cold in there--one open window can make it really cold when it's close to zero. Denver rarely gets that cold, but I have a feeling a broken window will cause problems. I can't leave it there indefinitely.

Maybe I'll just to move to NYC right away, where I hear they've got the whole crime thing under control now. Hahaha.

JANUARY 17, 2009 5:53PM

This seems to be question day for me. I'm not sure why. I'm tired of not knowing.

So Saturday is still my main club night as we only have one real gay danceclub in Denver these days, and Fridays are out as I'm not a lesbian. (Nor am I wild about sleeping with one.)

I try to adhere to the gayboy code, so every Saturday I try to avoid having bad breath after 10:30. It's OK to exhale curry during the daytime, but God help you on the dancefloor. (And gum and mints only work for a few minutes. They don't have that many mints at Tracks.)

So I try to eat bland foods in the afternoon, but I really don't know what the cutoff time is. Anyone know? How come everyone doesn't know this? None of my friends seem very confident of their answers. Is it just us?

I've heard onion can stay with you for a full day, and garlic for three (in your bloodstream, which your lungs continue to breath out). I don't know whether I picked that up from a reliable source, though, and/or whether those were trace amounts.

I generally get there around 10:30, and they drive us out onto the sidewalk around 1:45. (Bastards! Prudes.)

Today, for example, I was going for lunch at 1:40, and really wanted some spicy noodle from the Vietnames/cajun takeout place. (Yes, that's really a place. Amerasian couple. It works.)  Is that too late? Nine hours to metabolize? I took a chance, but didn't really know.

Oh, and how long does coffee breath last? Is that just in your mouth--meaning if I brush my teeth is it over--or does it get in your bloodstream, like spices? In that case, my question is more specific. I like a little jolt before I go out,  around nineish. (Does "ninish" take the e? Which is gramatically correct? Hehehe.) I brush right after. Is that OK, or do I need to stick to red bull.

Red bull seems to metabolize more slowly, and keeps me awake six hours later. Plus, Im under the impression that my (liver?) can metabolize both of them concurrently, so that I can get a double jolt by combining them, yet get rid of the two in less time than a double dose of just one. Is that true?

See what I'm dealing with? All these unknowns, they're just driving me crazy.

Please to inform.

Thanks. The Denver gayboys thank you as well. What a pleasure for them, not to smell my stinky breath.

JANUARY 17, 2009 12:36AM

This time, I neeed advice.

My laptop died nearly a year ago, and I need a new one. I have my eye on the HP HDX18t, because it has such a big screen. But I've been waiting for the best discount, and not sure when the best time to buy is.

I read a PC mag article awhile back that said the three best times of the year are usually back-to-school, pre-christmas and when they unload their unsold xmas inventory in late jan or Feb. This year might be different, though, as most retailers are deeply discounting everything, and low sales mean lots of inventory.

I have priced it several times on the HP site, and if I got everything the same, it dropped $160 between Dec. 29 and yesterday, Jan. 15.

So i don't know if the time is now. I  could really use it. Or should I wait 2, 3, 4 weeks.

How will I know when the optimal time has arrived? Any ideas?

thanks.

---------

Sept. Update. I did end up buying that laptop a couple weeks later, when I they ran a discount for something like 30% off.

OK, I'm really going to do it today. I think.

I'm going to upload posts from the past 6-8 months which I previously posted on OpenSalon, because the technology is so much simpler there. (I started this blog in 2001 or 2002, and I'm still on that dreaded Radio Userland software.)

Here goes. I'm going to date them. And I'll cull some of the trivial ones out.