Hey. You might have noticed I'm rarely here during the week these days.

Yes, by design. Trying to keep my focus entirely on my book during the week. Hence the big one-day bursts on Saturdays and Sundays. So look for me then. (Or on Mondays when you get back to trolling the web at the office, while your boss is away. heeheehee.)

OK, better try that bigger:

LOOK FOR ME MOSTLY ON THE WEEKENDS UNTIL THIS BOOK IS DONE!

Occasionally I may stop by in an evening, if I've had a great day and deserve an indulgence, or maybe once in awhile for a quickie. (Like just now. I figured since I was here to let you know this, I could pound out a quick reaction to the Housewives.)

But hopefully you'll see a lot of self-control.

See you Saturday.

This is not new, but still relevant: CBS announced awhile back that it's casting for Survivor 9, to film this summer, and broadcast in the fall. You've got to Jan 24 to get your application and video in. RealityTVWorld story here. Forms here.

You won't catch me auditioning this time. Lost interest in being a Survivor awhile back. I really wanted to be on the first one, when it was still a great unknown. The next couple would have been cool too, but now, it's kinda gotten down to riffraff. They pulled the All Stars thing just in time. But that will definitely be the sharp-jumping moment for that show. Who would want to be a second-tier Survivor, in the fading twilight of the show?

In other news, it's pretty safe to report now, that my friend Joe and I did not get picked for The Amazing Race 5. Didn't even make the first cut to the semi-finals. It's been safe to say for some time, but I've been kinda busy. But I can finally say that that's why I took the trip to LA this fall: just to meet with Joe to make an audition video. Plus it was a good excuse to get out of Denver, when I was going stir crazy. And coming right after the NYC trip, it solidified my feelings on where I wanted to move. (More on that later.)

But yeah. Went all the way to LA, just to make a tape to send in. I imagine 99% of the population would see that as either retarded and/or pathetic, but it's just a gauge of how badly I wanted an adventure like that. But this Drive Around the World thing might do it instead.

And I kinda think that will be the last reality show I'll ever audition for. But never say never.

Heeheehee. Now that I've got your attention (the Chip & Reichen addicts among you), I must inform you that the title of this post is a gross exageration.

I did spend the weekend at a party with him, but so did 250 other guests, and my contact was pretty modest. But addicts are addicts, so here goes:

First off, he's stunningly handsome in person. Is it the camera not doing justice to him, or the cross of having to stand beside Reichen all the time? Both, probably. He looked great in jeans, matinee-idol in his tux.

Here's the painful part about writing the above paragraph: Having met him, I feel like an ass comparing his looks to his husband's, or especially his ex-husband's.

moremoremore -- the rest of this entry here

This weekend, how to explain? I can't figure out how I'm going to express it without sounding like some rube who just rolled in off the turnip truck. So I guess I'll just risk it:

I know just one insanely rich person, and not that well, but several of my friends are close friends so I got invited along to a three-day birthday bash in Aspen.

Man. I felt like a weekend stowaway in the life of Malcom Forbes:

An "Eco Challenge" in the afternoon, shuttled back to change into tuxes, champaign and Godiva choclates on the gondola ride up to the top of Aspen mountain, drinks and hors d' oeuvre over sunset, with a dreamy white lace tent that looked like heaven to retreat to when it got chilly, back down the gondolas for a fabulous galla dinner in a stunning tent at the base of the mountain with five-figure ice sculptures and 250 eight-inch-high individual birthday cakes where everything on the dish and including the dish and utensils were edible, then another quick change to dancing clothes for a wild dance party one tent over, with a lighted dancefloor running video footage from the past 24 hours of celebration under your feet. More room parties until dawn. That was one day. It ran from Friday evening through Sunday afternoon.

I don't hang out with rich people, I don't go to oppulent parties, have never considered owning a tux and nearly refused the invitation because I could barely affored to rent one. But I rationalized that it was about all I would have to pay for for the weekend, and who knows what it might be in store.

I had no idea. It really is fun to be rich.

I'm not ready to sell my soul to get there, but man, it's a blast to play in their playground a few days.

Especially when it was a rich gay playground. About 95 percent of the attendees were gay men. Many of them stunningly beautiful, most of them highly successful. I had a couple long talks with former abassador James Hormell, and several shorter ones with Chip Arndt. (Yes, of Chip & Reichen. I sucessfully buried my lead for many regular readers. More about Chip in another post.)

Our host reserved the entire five-star hotel at the base of Aspen mountain, so the whole place was one big private party the entire weekend, and a bit like landing on fire island in the heart of Aspen. And to my utter amazement, the cliquishness you would normally find among a gathering of hot, successful gayboys was shifted way down to low gear. It was the friendliest, warmest atmosphere I've ever encountered in an event like that.

That was the nicest part. Often the bigger, the hotter, the gayer the event, the more I feel like an outsider. This really left me feeling good about myself, and about other gayboys. Nice to see we can be good to each other from time to time.

And the Eco Challenge was wonderfully designed, because nearly every event provided outs for different skill levels: you could slallom downhill on skateboards in the grass, requiring real skateboarding skill, or choose something silly like wheelbarrow races where a person seated in the barrow frantically directed a blindfolded pusher through an obstacle course. I chose the latter and had a lot of fun.

I also weanied out initially on our first event, the rock-climbing wall, choosing the ultra-easy wall, since I had never done it and was terribly hungover from Friday's all-night dance. But then I saw how easy it was, traded spots and did the moderate wall, terrified I would fall halfway up, humiliate myself and let the team down. But then I looked up, saw I was just a few handgrips away, and it had actually been pretty easy. It had been twenty years since I repelled, so it was scary as shit letting go at the top to float down, but incredibly cool once I was suspended.

I had so much adrenaline racing through my body, wiped out my hangover and had me fantasizing about taking the hard wall. And then the refs explained that since two teammates had fallen from the hard wall, (secured in harnesses, of course), we could still keep our perfect score if two more successfully scaled that wall in addition to the medium or easy. So I harnessed up again and got behind three more confident teammates. The first two fell, the third, our little spiderman who has been climbing for years, raced up it like an escalator, and then I gave it my shot.

I nearly slipped on the first hold, but recovered, zipped up quite a ways and then got stuck with two holds to go. I couldn't come close to reaching the next hold. I moved my hands around, my legs around, but it was hopeless. I must have done it wrong, ended up in the wrong spot, but there was no going back, because my hands and legs were starting to shake, I was losing my confidence and my grip--a few seconds more and I would be off the wall completely. 

The only chance I could see was shoving off hard letting go with both hands and one foot at the same time and lunging for this distant handhold way up there with my left hand, and then grabbing a slightly-higher one with my right. No chance of succeeding, but better to fly off grasping, so I leapt for it, braced for the rope to catch me and instead I caught the handhold an managed to hold on. The right hold was easy from there, and I leapt again to slap the qualifying carpet-strip, hurled back and this time spread my arms and enjoyed the smooth sail down.

The team was cheering wildly as litterally descended down amongst them, and I don't recall ever feeling like an athletic hero like that in my entire life. It was just one little event, and four other teammates made it to the hard-top first, and all ten people successully climbed the easy and medium walls, and it's not like we ended with a great time, but still: for that brief little moment, I was actually the hero of a sporting event.

It felt pretty good.

That was the nice thing about the whole afternoon, though. When you did well, that was great, when you screwed up, no big deal. At least on my team. We just had fun, and nobody seemed to feel like a fuckup. For a big group of gayboys, that's a really big deal.

The best thing about the whole trip was that I it was such a transportive experience. It was so beautiful there--the Aspens are still changing (past peak, but still beautiful), our room looked right on to the mountains, everything was happy and uplifting, and most importantly different.

Escape is definitely the word. I've always been into the experiential vactions, not the pampering kind, but this was the best of both. I was walking down the hill Saturday talking to the host--because by luck of the draw, he was on my Eco team--and mentioned that I had completely forgotten about all my problems back home. That's when I first realized that I had. I was so happy to notice.

And I got back here and they were not so big after all.

I just really, really needed that. Could not have been better timed.

Both of these courtesy of Joe Blitman:

Very big photo spread on our boys. I have not seen a hardcopy, but it's already being auctioned on ebay (odd, when you can just buy it yourself--perhaps not in Topeka?) And they've got page after page of it scanned in.

Slurp it up, then read on:

I hope you enjoy this trenchant commentary from Joe as much as I did:

I just picked up the Reichenchip copy of the Advocate tonight, and my, there was a whole lotta de-forestation done on those boys for the cover shot.  

Chip's chest pelt looks to have been about 90% trimmed and plucked, and there's nary a branch or twig on his back (must have been one of those summertime flash forest fires). and they artfully raised his part of the flag to cover his early love handles.  

Reichen has been shaved clean right down to his dick - he seems to have no pubes left at all - hmmm, sounds itchy to me.   He looks very "young" and very "restless".

I'm glad they're getting to live out yet another fantasy - near naked cover boys.  

And the hits just keep coming, don't they?

Yup. First the TV-star fantasy, now the pornstar fantasy, without all the baggage of actually doing the porn.

Update: Based on one comment, it appears that the tone intended by both Joe and me may not have been clear to some. I took it for granted that regular readers realized I adored those boys, and Joe likes them both as well.

I think we both found it fascinating to watch how their moment in the sun was evolving, how they were riding this particular train, where it was taking them. I thought the cover photo was a lot of fun, and they sure seemed to intend it that way, so he treated it in that same spirit and I really enjoyed what he did with it.

Another item from while I was away. This one a day old, from the Hollywood Reporter (I'll include all the paragraphs on The Amazing Race):

CBS' 'Race,' 'Brother' set for Season 5

CBS has picked up fifth installments of the reality series "Big Brother" and "The Amazing Race."

. . . The Julie Chen-hosted "Big Brother" is set to return in summer 2004, while "The Amazing Race," which won an Emmy this month for best reality/competition program, has received a 13-episode order for midseason or summer.

"I think qualitatively, both shows are absolutely at their peak," said Ghen Maynard, head of CBS' alternative programming department. "I think what we've really done well at CBS and what our whole goal has always been with shows like 'Amazing Race,' 'Big Brother' and 'Survivor' is to create long-lasting franchises that have appeal for the long term."

. . . "Amazing Race" has already started casting for its fifth edition, which will feature two-person teams trotting the globe for a $1 million prize.

. . . "We're incredibly thrilled that we got picked up again," said "Amazing Race" executive producer Bertram van Munster. "The fifth race is laid out and ready to go, and it is shaping up to be an extreme globe-trotting event."

He declined to reveal any details about the "drastic changes" he said the producers are making to keep the series fresh, but promised that the show's regular viewers "are going to be in for a big surprise."

Van Munster is executive producing "Amazing Race" with Jerry Bruckheimer and Jonathan Littman for Bruckheimer Films, Earthview and Touchstone TV.

NBC has also picked up more episodes of the shitty Restaurant for midseason, though it can't decide whether they'll continue with Rocco or try a new restaurant. Dump Rocco! He's an ass!

Yes, they have definitely broken up. Completely. Sorry this came out while I was in LA and unable to update, or I would have had it up sooner. (Much thanks to Michael from All About RC for the early heads up.)

The website All About RC has posted a message directly from our heroes, Chip & Reichen, announcing they have completely called it quits. An excerpt:

We recently gave an interview to the Advocate, which will appear on shelves 14 October 03. In that interview, we have officially announced that we are no longer pursuing our relationship and marriage and that we have decided to separate from each other. Further details are given in The Advocate interview. Without going into the intimate details of why we have decided to separate, please know that we have come to this decision, over a great deal of time, very seriously, to heart, and with great and on-going discussion, analysis, and thoughtfulness. It is the best decision for both of our physical and mental well-being, peace of mind, and happiness.

Well, that's just plain sad, sad, sad. But it happens. The only thing worse than a bad marriage is two people staying in a dead marriage just to say they did and destroying both lives in the process. Probably healthier for both of them. I wish them well.

(But the faint silver lining is, they're both available. Go get 'em boys! You're just going to come back with rebound burns, but don't let that stop you.)