This one caused me to do a double-take. Police are investigating reports that former astronaut "Buzz" Aldrin "punched a man in the face after being asked to swear on a Bible that he'd been to the moon." This is the old "goofball- comes-up-to-the-astronaut-in-a-parking-lot-and-accuses- him-of-being-part-of-a-NASA-conspiracy-to-fake- a-lunar-landing" routine. Happens a lot, I hear.

License to Steal

Steve Thomas, a publicist for the Boston software maker Cakewalk is defending the company's hot offering, Cakewalk Pyro 2003. The software allows you to duplicate copyright CDs on your computer, the way you always did and the way you always should be able to. Of course, you wouldn't make a copy and give it to a friend, as that would be illegal.

And Cakewalk doesn't condone it, Thomas says, adding that users should "rip and burn responsibly."

Letters from Our Readers

We get quite a bit of mail here at Raven HQ, as you might expect. We thought you would like to see what other readers are saying about the fine journalism and high standards we've established to comply with our mission statement: "Frightening the comforted and freshening the drinks of everybody else."

Hey you pompous, arrogant jackass. I've seen better writing on the back of a cereal box. Bet you think you're Mr. Smartypants, doncha?

5:14:12 PM       

As much as I hate to say it, we probably do have to send the machinery over to Iraq and clear the guy out. My change of heart comes after reading this report about Saddam Hussein's mistress. Parisoula Lampsos was interviewed at her location in hiding:

Lampsos said Saddam enjoys American music and movies—his favorite is The Godfather—and would sometimes dance to Frank Sinatra's hit, "Strangers in the Night."

Lampsos described tender moments with Saddam, who she said dyes his hair, uses herbal medicine to hide his wrinkles and occasionally takes the anti-impotence drug Viagra.

She also gave insight into Saddam's dark side, claiming that he enjoyed watching videos of his foes being tortured, sometimes wearing a cowboy hat for the occasion.

You Got That Right

Our "Understatement of the Year Award" goes to Matina Fresenius, CEO of Panicware. Her company makes anti-spam software and tools to block those infuriating "pop-up ads" you know and hate. She says in this Wired interview that the people who make pop-ups are very upset that we block their ads and that they are working 'round the clock to come up with ways to circumvent our cleverness:

The makers of one application engineered for this purpose, AntiAdBuster, claim their script will detect if a person is using ad-blocking software. Once it detects the ad-blocking software, it sends a message asking the person to turn it off and check out the ad.

Fresenius said she doubts many Web users find the offer appealing.

If It Ain't One Thing, It's Another

"After eliminating feral cat problem, Ventura now has rodent troubles."

They never learn.

Wedding Hijinx

If you have a minute, The Raven recommends you check out Dennis Mahoney's sample Best Man's Speech. Worth the click, trust me.

Genuises They Aren't

Y'know, ninety-nine percent of all the good stories seem to come from California. Here's one about two former militia followers named Kevin Patterson and Charles Kiles, who apparently planned to blow up a propane storage plant in Elk Grove. One supposes this would have resulted in a large and dramatic explosion.

At their sentencing, a federal judge called their plot a "hare-brained scheme," seeing as how they expected it to inspire people "to rise up and overthrow the U.S. government." Heck, they didn't have to do that. The government is doing an excellent job of inciting the Wrath of the People all by itself. My sympathy for Patterson and Kiles (who are shown at right respectively), is elicited by their photos which suggest they should have been released on their own repugnizance.

7:18:24 AM