You'll Be Sorry
If you get that Looneytoons tatoo on your bicep that you've been thinking about, that is. Maybe you're a Goth, and a cemetary fence around your neck is looking like the way to go; or maybe you're just really hip and the kanji for "dragon" seems perfect for your left shoulderblade. All of you folks really ought to think twice because getting that ink removed will be both painful and expensive. And chances are very good that you will want the damn thing off your body at some point downstream.
- "It's a huge market," says Anna DeGraff of the Cosmetic Laser Center, who has been on the job six years. "I've removed thousands."
The linked article on the exploding new industry of tatoo-removal clinics is highly persuasive in its depiction of an obvious truth: You won't be the same person in 10 years that you are today. What's cool in a club is most uncool in a boardroom. "Screw society," you think. "I don't give a damn what anybody thinks about the flaming skull on my wrist. If it offends you, you have a problem." Yeah, that's how being a 20-year-old feels.
- DeGraff empties two syringes, putting shots of anesthesia in Keene's neck, which makes even his tongue numb. She cranks up the bulky laser machine, and the two slide on green-lensed goggles.
"You ready, buddy?" she asks. "Sure," he says. "Is that good?" she asks, aiming her light saber at his skin and firing short bursts that illuminate the small room. "Not really," he says, wincing. He squeezes a small sand-filled balloon until his knuckles turn white. The room smells slightly of burnt flesh.
And that's how being an adult feels. After being turned down by a dozen employers—who didn't like the flaming skull.
Of Poets and Pride
Yes, you've been hearing a lot about Amiri Baraka, New Jersey's poet laureate who follows an anti-Semetic muse. Turns out California's first (and maybe last) poet laureate is in trouble now, too. At first, though, it seemed that Quincy Troupe had all the right qualifications for the post. Here are a few:
 - Troupe edited James Baldwin: The Legacy and was co-author with noted jazz musician Miles Davis on the best-selling Miles: The Autobiography. His 13th book, Take It to the Hoop, Magic Johnson, based on his work "Poem for Magic," was published as a children's book. His latest project will be a children's book on Stevie Wonder. He earned a Bachelor of Arts degree from Grambling College in Louisiana.
See? He's got everything you could—uh-oh, no, turns out he lied about the college degree. Now here's the weird part. Even though he has resigned his post, he's still a tenured professor of creative writing and literature at UC San Diego. The university, "which is still investigating similar precedents of tenured professors who do not have bachelor's degrees, will complete its review in six weeks." The Raven says enough of this poet laureate crap. The position is obviously a "feel good" bon mot that has nothing to do with poetry and everything to do with the construction of defensive bulwarking around states' senatorial sponsorship of arts programs.
10:24:44 AM 
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Monday, October 21, 2002
