For thousands of years, we've been beguiled by tales of the phoenix—the blazing bird, a firey fowl immortal. Doomed to die in Promethean splendour, it rises from the ashes, angry, dirty, and genuinely looking to give somebody a bad time. That's how this morning looks to us.

The Walking Dead

Otherwise known as the "poets" who walk amongst you and me with a lot of bad attitude and no place to stick it but in their own tattered chapbooks. But next Monday night a group of them are planning to meet in New York to "stand and deliver," as they say, on the subject of war at an event called "Poems Not Fit for the White House." Turns out there are going to be some big names in the bunch.

The luminaries include playwright Arthur Miller and a number of former U.S. poets laureate, while rapper Mos Def's attendence is expected to lend a hard edge of urban authenticity to the proceedings.

Here's U.S. poet laureate Billy Collins, who says he opposes war with Iraq and is finding it difficult to keep politics out of his work. For its part, the government is finding it a simple matter to keep poetry off of its radar screen, as demonstrated by Laura Bush, who put the kibosh on a planned slam at the White House when she found out that the bards would be singing of war.

The first lady subsequently canceled the symposium, saying she "did not believe poetry should be used for political purposes."

Anti-intellectualism:

Lets use the public schools
To teach the people lies,
And tests on Socrates
To see who follows rules.
- G.M.

Empty beer cans waited
an ignominious return to useful life,
windshield washer parts could not know glory.
- G.T.

Our president has good speech writers,
But good enough to enlist the fighters?
We haven't seen a shed of proof
That Iraq's anger's hit the roof.
- J.R.

Going Out in Flames

The trick the phoenix pulls off is best left to the professionals. But lots of people manage to go out in a blaze of glory. They just don't come back. Nat Hentoff has an interesting column in the Village Voice that's worth a look.

Acting on that presidential authorization, "a pilotless Predator aircraft operated [by the CIA] fired a Hellfire antitank missile" at a car in a remote region of Yemen, killing six, including an Al Qaeda leader, Salim Sinan al-Harethi, and "one suspected al-Qaeda operative with United States citizenship."

Back from the Dead

That would be those defunct Eastern Bloc countries trying to clambor on board the EU wagon. French President Jacques Chirac has been giving some of them a pretty rough time if they've shown the temerity to support American objectives. He says, of Bulgaria and Romania, that "If anyone had wanted to damage their chances of joining the EU, they could not have done it in a better way." The reports from the press conference in Brussels make it clear that this was a working meeting:

As the leaders ate their way through grilled scallops with truffles, followed by monkfish with aubergine, a selection of cheeses and fresh pineapple, they alluded to the possibility of military action for the first time by specifying that force could not be ruled out, but insisting that it should be used "only as a last resort."

But Sometimes They Do Come Back

A case in point would be one of the survivors of that Chicago nightclub incident. Here's a RealVideo clip of one of them, who recounts waking up inside of a body bag. It's a gripping narrative, and you'll discover that sliding down bannisters like you did as a child just might be a life-saving maneuver.

The Immortal One

Well, yes, that is the phoenix, but it's also Tom Jones, who is doing fabulously well as he resurrects his image into a modern symbol of cool. Teaming up with Robbie Williams and Wyclef Jean is doing wonders for his career. What keeps him going strong at 62?

"Performing live is as close as you get to making love. There's the anticipation, the adrenaline when you are performing and the big satisfaction when you wind down—that's like having a cigarette afterwards."

Fire and Ice

We're not sure what a 45-year-old Japanese tourist named Atsushi Ishiguro was trying to pull when he got nabbed at Miami International with a cannister of gasoline and a barbecue grill. Perhaps he was planning on grilling his own lunch in the friendly skies. But he ran afoul of the Year of the Crackdown, and has been charged with "creating a potential safety hazard." Poor schmuck.

Now this is as bad as it gets: Pair Had Sex with Dead Girl, 4.

Donald Luis Cooper, 32, and Chaunee Marie Helm, 30, were working for All County Transportation, a company that delivers corpses to a California county coroner's office and...Even I've got my limits. Read it if you can stand it.

11:10:54 AM