Squirrel-B-Gone Feeder 8/25

Many of us extend a warm and generous welcome to wild birds by providing bird feeders and bird baths on our property. The Raven also likes to watch squirrels as they frolic in the arboreal heights, performing death-defying leaps from tree to tree. The Raven does not like to watch said squirrels consuming 4 or 5 dollars'-worth of birdseed in a single afternoon. After failing to protect the feeders with various devices and whatnot, we finally found a solution: the Squirrel-B-Gone feeder. Works like this: Squirrel jumps onto feeder, squirrel's own weight closes feeding ports, squirrel makes valiant attempt to get at food, owner watching from window laughs and laughs, squirrel dashes off angry and frustrated. Hours of fun.

Walking Tall

It isn't often you get to say that Mexico leads the United States of America, but when citizens blockade the site of a proposed Costco store you have to stand up and cheer. Residents of the southern city of Cuernavaca, sick of strip mall development, are battling Costco's plans to demolish their picturesque city park and historical site. Way to go, amigos!

On my morning drive, I watch construction being completed on a second WalMart Supercenter in my town, bringing our total to three WalMarts for a city of less than 100,000 people because WalMart Corp has a pathological hatred for our local merchants and mom-and-pop stores and won't stop building WalMarts until they're all gone.

Bad Ideas, Cont.

The US isn't happy with Moscow's plan to build nuclear reactors in Iran and expand their trade with Iraq. Besides, if anybody wants to sell them nuclear technology, they'll have to get in line behind Bechtel. Making a Federal Case

In this case filed against the House of Blues, the plaintiff - who is a muslim - claims that "a supervisor referred to him as 'Osama bin Laden' at least three times, once in front of the staff at a meeting." The problem here is that Cengiz Yalinkilic's federal lawsuit claims discrimination, whereas I'd say he's being harrassed. I'd also say he oughta grow up but this is America, land where no one ever has hurt feelings.

I Knew It

A new study indicates that ginkgo supplements "do nothing to improve memory." Of course, the makers beg to differ:

David Morrison of Pharmaton Natural Health Products, which produces Ginkoba, said findings from a single study don't "negate the vast body of evidence showing that ginkgo biloba is effective."

Effective at making profits for Phamaton, anyway. OK, one more...

Those Darn Trees

President Bush, well-known for his courageous stand on various environmental issues, has announced a new plan to fight wildfires in our national forests. See, the problem is the trees, which tend to catch fire every now and then. This is where American lumber companies can really help out, and at the same time we can create more jobs and spur local economic growth. It's a win-win situation for everybody.

"For the good of our economy, we need commonsense forest policy," Bush said during a stop at Mount Rushmore last week. "We can and we must manage our forests. We must keep them disease-free. We must have reasonable forest policies so as to prevent fires, not encourage them."

They'll "manage" those national forests, all right.

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