Dog Given an Unfortunate Name
The name of the new presidential dog is causing an uproar amongst many supporters of the chief executive who consider it 'stupid sounding'. The one-week-old Scottish terrier was barely out of the womb before it was given the moniker of Miss Beazley.
"I don't know," said one white house aid, James Bancroft, speaking off the record. "It sounds kind of effete to me. If you catch my drift. If you get my meaning. Wink wink nudge nudge. Now, Barney, that's a good solid name for a dog. A manly name. If you catch my drift. If you get my meaning. Wink wink nudge nudge."
Barney, unfortunately, is no longer a cute little puppy, and is considered to have outlived his political usefulness. He will be put out to stud at the Birch Tree Republican Puppy Farm in Cleveland Ohio as soon as Miss Beazley <pffftt> is old enough to move into the White House.
Another factor that has given conservatives pause is the incestuous nature of the relationships between the presidential dogs. It is understood that Miss Beazley's father is Barney's half-brother, and as the Reverend Pat Robertson said, speaking under cover of anonymity, "that's gotta be some kind of sin".
Miss Beazley was named after Uncle Beazley, a dinosaur in the children's book "The Enormous Egg" by Oliver Butterworth. Other names which were proposed but rejected include Missus Butterworth, Queen Latifah, Madam Hoopengardner, and Spot. |
