The Real Tom Delay
Story

Political analyst Dr. Jack Wheeler has published
the real truth behind the charges against Tom Delay, and it's not what you
think! Okay, I guess I tipped my hand a little by putting this picture of
Hillary up front, didn't I? But if this had been a picture of Katie Couric
or a puppy, then you'd really be surprised by what Wheeler has to say. This
is Hillary's handiwork.
"Hillary's fingerprints are
all over it. She has no intention of having to deal with an opposition
party controlling the House as her husband did for six years and Ronald
Reagan did for eight. She has a very clear plan for seizing control of the
entire United States government, which includes orchestrating Democrat
control of the House in 2006 so it is firmly in place when she is elected
president in 2008."
We would love to give you a link right to
this story, but, well, it's like this - Dr. Jack wants me to give him $8.99
in order to read it. He does point out that this is only 29 cents a day,
which I would gladly pay as the cost of research, but I don't see any one
day membership options, so I am forced to use the
WordNetDaily summary instead. Being easily distracted, this is somewhat
of a problem, since I find it hard to ignore links to other stories, like
the one about the
unborn
baby threatening his mother in a hamburger ad ("Fast-food chain has
tough-talking fetus suggesting he'll rip out mother's uterus"). But back to
Wheeler, who believes that it is "at Hillary's direction that the Washington
Post, the New York Times, and the entire Liberal Media apparatus are waging
a relentless war" on Delay.
"...the substance doesn't
matter – all that matters is the attacks themselves, that they be kept up
until more and more spineless pencil-necks like Connecticut Republicans
Chris Shays and Rob Simmons break and crack under pressure. Hillary knows
exactly what she is doing. Target the strongest force the GOP has in
Congress – DeLay – keep targeting until Republicans surrender and retreat
in disarray, then pick up the easy pieces in 2006."
And why should you believe Wheeler? Well,
let's take a look at his
bio,
which his pay site, 'To The Point', lets you read for free. "At 12, he
became the Youngest Eagle Scout in Boy Scout history," an achievement which
brought him recognition from President Eisenhower. Then, at 14, he climbed
the Matterhorn, and at 16, he swam the Hellespont, "recreating the legend of
Leander in Greek mythology." I was a little sketchy on the Leander story, so
I looked it up and found that Leander used to swim the Hellespont every
day to see his girlfriend, until one day he accidentally drowned. His girl
found the body and committed suicide.
No much of a myth, that one. Not like
Wheeler, who at the tender age of 17 "hunted and killed a man-eating tiger
responsible for the deaths of over 20 Montagnard tribespeople in the
highlands of South Viet Nam." I won't even get into his adult life, where
among other accomplishments he was the first person to sky dive over the
North Pole, and the creator of the 'Regan Doctrine'.
These are only few of the reasons that
Wheeler's theory on Hillary is to be taken seriously. Plus the fact that
those quotes were given to him by a 'member of the House leadership'. Could
it have been Delay himself? Nah. Now I'm just being paranoid. |