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Your Government in Action
The coveted Moronadon Award goes to the House of
Representatives
Washington Post, 11/19: Things got very heated in
the House of Representatives today as Democrats force a vote which called
for US forces to stay in Iraq forever. The chamber exploded into innumerable
interlocking pieces when one senior member called a decorated war veteran a
coward for suggesting that the military could pull out before the end of the
decade.
Republicans had to physically restrain one colleague who
appeared as if he might lose control of his bodily functions as he rushed
across the aisle (yes, they do have separate seating sections) to confront
Democrats with the jabbing finger of death, accusing Democrats of playing
political games with the war.
"Outrageous," cried the Democrats. "You're the ones who
are playing games with the war".
"Indeed we are not," shouted the
out-of-control-finger-jabber. "We're dead serious. Strike that remark. We're
very serious."
Democrat leaders hastily scheduled a vote on a bill
requiring the Bush administration to declare Iraq the fifty-first state, an
idea proposed on Thursday by Rep. Dick Bigger (R-Md.) The Democrat sponsored
bill was defeated by a vote of 399 to 7, a result that surprised no one but
Mister Bigger.
The whole idea was to force Republicans to go on the
record in support of a proposal that the Bush administration says would be a
swell idea, and besides, we don't have the money to bring those guys back
home and still extend capital gains tax cuts.
Recognizing a political trap, most Republicans said from
the very beginning that they would vote no, but could you please repeat the
part about capital gains.
The vote brought into clear perspective the chambers raw
partisan divisions and prompted a frenzied scene which Capitol Hill veterans
labeled as the wackiest and most pathetic session they had ever witnessed.
Rep. David R. Obey (D-Wis.) voiced his opinion that with an election coming
up in '06, "maybe the public should vote all of these idiots out, present
company excluded". The public said that they are taking his advice under
consideration.
"I don't know about my esteemed colleagues... cough,
cough... but this is hardly what I would call an intelligent civilized
debate," said Rep. Sam Johnson (R-Tex.). And then he was hit with a pie. |
