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United States, North Carolina, Carrboro, English, Paul, Male, 56-60, All Music, All Food.

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Friday, August 29, 2003

a little more Wesley Willis... My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks Found on Rock 'N' Roll Jackflash My mother is a dope fiend My mother smokes paraphenelia as I speak My mother buys cocaine from a dope man She loves to smoke that crack pipe My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smoked that crack like a cigar She had a good time at it She jacks my brother for dope money She does it by threatening him with a Smith & Wesson My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks At 11:00 PM, the police came to my mother's house to eject her They arrested my mother for possession of a controlled substance My mother was taken to the metal clink They locked her up for being a loser My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks My mother smokes crack rocks 11:15:00 PM    comment []

A Man And His Music lyrics by Wesley Willis, bless his soul... Cut the Mullet Found on SMD Promotions and Greatest Hits Vol. 2 Do something about your long, filthy hair It looks like a rat's nest Do something about your mullet Get out the hair clippers, jerk Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Get the rat's nest off your head Get that crazy-ass mother off your skull Take your ass to the barber shop Tell the barber that you're sick of looking like an asshole Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet The mullet is the reason why people hate you They are sick of looking at your nappy weed-sack Nobody wants to look at you with that mullet on your head Why don't you cut that mullet, you numbskull Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet Cut the mullet 11:08:01 PM    comment []

Twyla's Market Report   pssst...Twyla here- remember me? Last time I spoke to you, the NASDAQ was floundering around 1500 and nobody but bottom-fishers seemed interested. My concern at the time was all the money that Daddy had lost which, for me, translated into bowls of Chatham County cat food and its vaguely sulphuric aroma. I was pretty much reconciled to a lifetime of never tasting that sweet Sheba cat food again. Now the NASDAQ seems fairly stable around the 1800 mark and the S&P has closed above 1000 on consecutive days. I don't want to get too hopeful, because an old Tom Cat once told me "First of May, go way, don't come back 'til Labor Day" - but that was when the Fat Cats took the summer off to spend times on the yachts. Anyway, Pounce Caribbean Catch may not be Sheba, but I'd really like the green, yellow, and purple layered faux fish if I could see colors. It has a "nose" of dead fish, one of my favorite aromas and it is suitably chewy. No Sheba, not by a longshot, but certainly better than Chatham County. Daddy read the label to me, as if I would care, and he said something about "tropical fish flavor." I ate a bowlful of tropical fish one time and really wasn't that impressed. They taste just like regular fish, only they're smaller. Bottom line here - as long as Daddy keeps his job I don't really give a shit whether this is a "jobless recovery" or what. If I have to, I can get by on Meow Mix and the occasional bug that crawls in under the door. 9:50:36 PM    comment []

These are the buns I wanted to make. An extra egg in the dough and an egg wash atop. 'Ove' Glove has officially welcomed the bun pan to the kitchen. Let's have a burger! 3:19:08 PM    comment []

Yeast Affection 'Ove' Glove and I are both really fond of Red Star Baking Yeast. It's all I've used the past 5 years. Yeah, I've made sourdough breads where you try to catch whatever's in the air (and sometimes wish you hadn't), I've read the Cooks' Illustrated test kitchen reports on which yeasts work best for which jobs, and I've even flirted with the bread mystique where you become so pure that you only use Old World flours. However, texture and crust, the qualities I admire most, come about mainly as a result of technique and handling. So I use fast-acting cheap yeast. Red Star is cheaper at BJ's Warehouse, where you can get two pounds for under 5 dollars, but the bulk amounts are not suitable for the normal home kitchen because the yeast gets a little old by the time you get to the bottom of a one-pound bag. I store the smaller amounts in an old pickle jar (a little one) in the fridge and refresh it when necessary. Lately, I've been baking more - so I'm not worried about that 09/12/03 sell-by date. Weaver Street probably buys the yeast in the same bags BJ's has, then parcels it out in 4 to 6-ounce bags. I'll pay the markup for the convenience (Weaver Street is less than a mile, BJ's about 20) and the freshness. 11:49:07 AM    comment []

Some very sad news for lovers of street music everywhere: Wesley Willis has died from leukemia. I became A Willis fan just a few years ago, enjoying the energy and true insanity of such classics as Cut The Mullet and My Mother Smokes Crack Rocks. I hope to get a bump on the head today, from a spiritual goodbye head butt (His way of greeting people). Maybe he didn't die, maybe he just went to Mars... 7:05:18 AM    comment []