This is my blogchalk:
United States, North Carolina, Carrboro, English, Paul, Male, 56-60, All Music, All Food.

Subscribe to this blog in Radio:

Saturday, January 03, 2004

4:50:23 PM    comment []

Howard Tate: Just heard him on Fresh Air. His life reads like a Chick Tract, but his voice soothes like a thousand caressing guardian angels. Rediscovered – Listen while you can… 3:08:21 PM    comment []

Robertson: God says it's Bush in a 'blowout' in November But what does Satan say? Aren't they supposed to appear at the same time, little moral dilemma action figures, one on each shoulder, bickering about the relative merits of Good vs. Evil choices, upside, downside, etc. - Satan is the one with the funky pitchfork and pointy tail wearing red PJs; God favors white lightly-starched broadcloth with gold wings, and has a bedroom baritone, James Earl Jones kind of voice. I'm not sure if they change colors depending on whose home field it is, but since they are the only players neither wears a number. That's too bad because I hear, when The Apocalypse comes, Satan is due for a major and permanent ass-kicking (after a strong third quarter). He’s had a decent career and there ought to be some way to retire his number, but he doesn’t have one. Seems to me that the Apocalypse Bowl is even dumber than the BCS, because (similarly) there's no guarantee the best teams will even play each other (Where's Allah? Where’s Durga, “The Inaccessible”?) and worse than BCS, it will only happen once. Eternity is a awfully long time for fans to wonder if “strength of schedule” is a true determinant or just some geeky fudge factor. Most of us don’t mind listening to arguments about that kind of crap for just one off season, but not for eternity – there are simply not enough harps and hosannas to drown out that bullshit. We need a single elimination tournament, where even Vanderbilt gets a shot at the eternal title. Oh, and what if Satan manages to pull off an upset, despite what the pundits have been saying for what seems like an eternity? Nobody gave my beloved Buckeyes a chance in last year's BCS and yet, when the dust settled over the Fiesta Bowl, they were singing Carmen Ohio and the Hurricanes and know-it-all pundits were chowin' down on cold crow. Nobody really knows who will win, that's why they play the game. If the outcome were truly predetermined, there'd be no point in it, right? 2:09:06 PM    comment []

So When Did God Shout "Cut!"? Maybe my imagination is overactive, but every once in a while I see a headline that could have made it into The Bible if they hadn’t just quit writing it. Look, aren’t those bulrushes at the edge of the Red Sea? Holy Moses! Ain’t that enough to make you quit drinking?   I wonder why they quit writing The Bible. They had some good material and, even though Revelation would be admittedly a hard act to follow, with all those supersized horsemen and glowing beasts, but shit – they’ve had nearly 2,000 years to work on it. Hollywood can crank up a sequel in a matter of months, so it’s not because of a shortage of opportunistic talent in the Judeo-Christian alliance. So what’s the hold-up? Just put the focus on production instead of quality.   Maybe they’re already working on it. Maybe in those caves, the ones where they found the Dead Sea Scrolls, there are a bunch of Brownie monks with mushroom haircuts, maybe with financial help from Falwell & Robertson, meticulously hallucinating extreme Biblical thoughts under the influence of experimental drugs from Bristol-Myers Squibb (BMY), computer generating illuminated text via ESP software from the CIA. Wouldn’t that be something!   It doesn’t say anywhere in The Bible that God told us to quit writing this shit down - and some fairly important things have happened in the last millennium or two. I mean, even Scorsese allows DVDs of his cinematic masterpieces to be released with alternate endings and previously deleted scenes, so what’s the problem with The Bible? 6:32:56 AM    comment []