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Sunday, January 18, 2004

Mission Deconstructed   Back in the days when Saddam Hussein and the mujahideen were our partners in arms, it seems our old buddy Richard Perle had some novel ideas how to really screw the Russians (DANGER: extremely graphic language at this link). Here’s the plan: Their idea was to encourage Soviet officers and soldiers to defect to the mujahideen. As [CIA chief Gust] Avrakotos derisively describes it, "The muj (editorial insertion - familiarity breeds terrorists) were supposed to set up loudspeakers in the mountains announcing such things as 'Lay down your arms, there is a passage to the West and to freedom.'" Once news of the program made its way through the Red Army, it was argued, there would be a flood of defectors. Sound familiar? It should. It appears Perle was also the source of the idea, with a little encouragement from Dr. Ahmad Chalabi, that Iraqis would welcome US armed forces as liberators. Dumb ideas, like old soldiers, never die. (Perle completes his gonzo resume as the prime mover of the concept that Iraqi oil would finance the war after the liberation. Wrong! Who is paying? Let's play Wheel Of Fortune! "T _ X P _ Y _ R  S" - pssst...wannna buy a vowel? - whaddya mean you can't afford one?)   Just one more Iraq distortion: It has been frequently quoted in recent weeks that attacks have diminished 22% since Saddam was captured. But read the fine print: 22 troops killed from Nov. 16 through Dec. 13 and 31 in the comparable period Dec. 14- Jan. 10. But the figures for deaths do not include the 17 U.S. soldiers who died Nov. 15 when two helicopters crashed in the city of Mosul. 31 – 22 = 9. 9/22 = .409. .409 x 100 = ~41% increase in combat deaths. Therefore, since attacks have decreased 22% and their toll has risen 41%, the efficiency of these attacks (and I don’t mean to make light of them, only to point out the selective nature of citing the decrease as an “improvement.”) has risen. It’s kinda like the jobless recovery over here, where fewer people working are generating increased productivity numbers. Somewhere, over the rainbow and the silver lining, there’s a cloud. Maybe it’s pessimistic to point that out, but it’s misleading to cherry pick numbers for headlines. Since that 22% number has been used to attack gaffe-prone, unelectable, McGovern-clone Howard Dean’s statement that we are “no safer now,” why has the 41% been relegated to the “who the fuck cares” category? Don’t ask me why the deaths of 17 US soldiers are not included at all, I’m just citing the USA Today article and plugging in their numbers. What bothers me is that, while we’ve mostly avoided “flashback” body counts, now we’re citing fluctuations in attacks, deaths, and casualties as though they are just numbers in a quarterly report of a Fortune 500 company.   So back to Richard Perle. Since his bad judgment is responsible for a large number of post-invasion casualties and <arghh!> $87 billion in additional taxpayer expense, why is he still on the government payroll and not in prison or a mental institution? We’re being treated daily to a Macy's Parade of PowerPoint® presentations and high-floating Excel® spreadsheet generated numbers for the accounting, but where’s the accountability? 7:41:54 PM    comment []

Better Living Through Science Keep young and beautiful by drinking beer - that is what Bavarian entrepreneur Helmut Fricher is promising. Anti-ageing beer was presented to the world at a German agricultural fair this week - a drink which the brewer says will bring body and soul into harmony. But the new wonder drink may fall foul of Germany's oldest law, the Beer Purity Regulation… The Reinheitsgebot, the world's oldest valid law, dating from 1516, states strictly that beer can contain only four ingredients: hops, barley, yeast and water.   Wow! Almost any beer drinker can attest that ordinary beer can take 20 years off that lady sitting down at the end of the bar, if you drink enough, Likewise, almost any beer can make you believe that you are young and beautiful, and witty to boot, but Helmut claims to have something that actually does it and the German government is hung up on some ancient standard of “purity.”   Let’s see what is in Helmut’s beer besides hops, barley, yeast and water… It is brewed in the normal way, but then key ingredients are added. There is spirulina algae, which, as the German version of Men's Health magazine notes, is well known to health fanatics as an extra source of minerals. Another key element is the protein flavonoid, which is supposed to work against cancer. Algae – isn’t that the slimey green stuff growing in the fish tank? Flavonoid? Hey! – why no coral calcium? Look here, brother, who you jivin’ with that cosmic debris? There is still hope for Helmut. He can always sell his strange brew in the US, where nobody gives a fuck what they put in the beer as long as they keep the carbs down. 6:41:53 PM    comment []

Not quite enough gruyere, but was was still rich and flavorful. I'd like to thank the cows who sacrificed their all to make this possible. 4:00:28 PM    comment []

Three large onions, after an hour of being caramelized very slowly.   At this point, You add a chopped clove of garlic and sauté a minute longer. The burst of aroma at that point is worth it even if you don’t do anything else. The recipe calls for brandy to be added then, but I had none and no chance of buying any on Sunday. Madeira is used in other rich sauces so that will do. Cook until nearly dry, sprinkle with a little flour, then add the broth. It’s simmering now. The complete recipe is here. 3:04:18 PM    comment []

This is the bean slaw just before it was tossed with the dressing.  Rayne commented on the last post that she didn’t like the sound of the cream cheese in the dressing and I had thought it sounded a little odd. However the crème fraiche I’d made a couple of weeks ago had little red dots on top and that won it at automatic all expenses paid trip down the garbage disposal. I added some ripe olives to the recipe. It looked too healthy so I I fried up a couple of strips of bacon and threw that in too. Now it all rests in a refrigerated Ziplock. 12:14:22 PM    comment []

I Fought The Slaw   Inspired by two words from Rayne, “bean slaw,” I decided to go on a Google hunt for recipes. The browser was already open and there was the strange news about Spaulding Gray. The mystery for me is how the self-confident actor who did Swimming To Cambodia could lapse into a two year funk. That’s a long time to be depressed.   Anyway.   The recipes popped up quickly. This one, with onions, sweet red pepper, and cucumber with a cream cheese and red wine vinegar dressing, sounds interesting. You cook the beans 8 minutes then plunge them into ice water – sauna beans! From the Watkins man is a fakeout – Mexicorn (what a dumb word) and black bean slaw. But it got me wondering. When I hear “slaw” I think of “cole slaw” and therefore cabbage. It’s the simple words that get you. What does  “slaw” mean?   That’s why I keep the American Heritage® Dictionary on my toolbar, but it wasn’t much help this time.                     NOUN:Chiefly Southern U.S. Coleslaw   It’s got to mean a mélange of vegetables with a dressing – maybe with milk or other dairy – but where does it say that?   Let’s try FOODTV. Ah, here’s a recipe for Open-faced Chili Burgers on Grilled Portabella “Buns” with Smoked Cheese. No, stay on task. Here’s the Encyclopedia. Two entries: coleslaw and cabbage. Not looking so good. But wait a minute, this definition of coleslaw seems to fit the bill:   Definition: From the Dutch koolsla, meaning "cool cabbage," coleslaw is a salad of shredded red or white cabbage mixed with a mayonnaise, vinaigrette or other type of dressing. Other ingredients such as chopped onion, celery, sweet green or red pepper, pickles, bacon or herbs may be added. There are probably as many variations of coleslaw as there are cooks   I like that koolsla. Wonder if that word is also used in East Frisia? Anyway, it makes sense now. As “coleslaw” itself grew to include many things, the word shortened to “slaw” and the original connection to cabbage was lost.   Glad that’s done. We’re also going to have some French Onion Soup, made with the pressure cooker broth. I’m gonna fry up some wiener schnitzel too. 8:31:15 AM    comment []