This is my blogchalk:
United States, North Carolina, Carrboro, English, Paul, Male, 56-60, All Music, All Food.

Subscribe to this blog in Radio:

Monday, March 01, 2004

Another major foreign policy victory!   Aristide has gone, the death squads are back, and on the streets the looters rule!   Those silly Haitians are routinely slaughtering each other and stealing shit - they’re just so happy! They have large toothy smiles on their faces! They're drinking cheap rum and pissing in the gutters! God, do I wish I could be in Haiti right now to participate in this wild party and enthusiastic celebration of newfound freedom! We never have real fun like that in this country; we're just too fucking civilized. God, do I ever envy those uninhibited primitives.   Logically Airtight   "That's nonsense," President Bush's chief spokesman, Scott McClellan, said at the White House.   Mr. Rumsfeld grinned broadly for several empty seconds. "I'm trying to pick the right words," he said in evident disdain for the premise behind the question, slyly pulling back his suit jacket to reveal a loaded pearl-handled pistol, stroking it affectionately as his eyes glazed over. When Mr. Rumsfeld was asked the precise role of the United States military in removing Mr. Aristide, he replied, "The U.S. military role was to — the Department of State managed that entire process. We’re more involved with the big picture here. We don’t commit ourselves in the day-to-day management of any insignificant Third World idiocy, Heavens to Betsy, no! They do drugs and have AIDS and things” Powell: Aristide must keep his job (Feb. 20, 2004)   The White House described the allegations as "nonsense" and Secretary of State Colin Powell called them "absurd." Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld also swept the accusations aside. Aristide's departure "was the result of perfect co-ordination" between Washington and Paris, French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin said.   The good news for us who enjoy food is that we won’t have to eat Freedom Fries and Freedom bread much longer, both of which kinda stick in the craw when served with Orwellian adjectives. They just don’t taste the same. I mean, they can cram ‘em down our throats, which seems to be their intent. They can even choke us on them, they have a lot of bombs even if they are stupid, and you gotta respect that - but if they are depending on the cooperation of France, they’ll have to call those conroversial foodstuufs something else while they come up with another convenient cover-up story.   Neener-neener-neener.   6:58:33 PM    comment []

You can spend a couple of hundred bucks for the Hearthkit (anyone who ever built a Heathkit will probably smile and will certainly want to go here) or you can stoop to desperation measures like the one you see here. The baking tiles came from The SausageMaker (who unfortunately doesn’t carry them anymore, but you can use other unglazed tiles as described here). The tiles in the tray are great because they fit nicely in the dishwasher unlike the gigantic stones. The bricks were free, given to me by a friend many years ago. They haven’t been in the oven for a while but after buying the time-averaging oven thermometer yesterday I realized more mass in the oven would slow down the sine wave temperature cycle and possibly limit its amplitude too. The ultimate solution is a gas oven of course, which maintains a steady temperature on its own.   Electric heat is always inferior, especially for baking. You need a constant temperature, not pulsating 10% variations resembling the mood swings of a temperamental teenager. “Average” just doesn’t make it for even more temperamental dishes like a New York cheesecake. Stability is critical and if you ain’t got it, you’ve got to improvise it. I’m taking measurements on this buffered system right now. During the earlier test yesterday, I found that the “average” temperature measured by the thermometer eventually settled in at 320 º - even though the deceptively integer digital thermostat read a perfect 300 º. I’m not concerned about the higher average heat, nearly every oven has compensation for that if you check the manual. What concerns me is that it took over two hours to stabilize at that, even though the preheated alarm went off at less than 10 minutes.   I don’t know how many on/off cycles to get there, but the temperature in the buffered system should “coast” up more slowly after the thermostat cuts off the heating element and also cool more slowly, allowing the oven to stay closer to its average temperature. As Emeril says (way too much, IMO), “this isn’t rocket science.” No it’s music. Fat strings with more mass vibrate more slowly then the tiny little ones.   Interim Update: Promising. Max temperature so far (at 40 minutes) is 311º and the heating element kicks on at about 296º. Wish this thermometer had a min/max setting, that would make it a serious tool. As is, I gotta keep watching it - but it's better than most TV.   Later Update: Thermostat kick on the heating element at 298º, the temperature drops to 297º, then begins to quickly rise with the element heating up. The thermostat goes bonkers, switing on and off repeatedly in the range 298º to 306º. Then it goes off and the temperature continues to coast more slowly up to 315º, hang there a while, and starts dropping again. That's an 18º swing, or just 6% of the target temperature of 300º. I'm gonna leave them bricks in the oven.    Still Later Update: Shit! After an hour and 10 minutes the oven is now coasting up to 322º. Turdface! Son of a bitch! Electric ovens suck the green slime out the butts of bottom feeders. It just took longer with the bricks in there for this one's lips to zero in on the nearest butt like a heat-seeking missile! Asshole! Anyway, the oven is warm and there's a marinated brisket in the fridge. Sounds like dinner. 5:29:52 PM    comment []