Everything Is Broken – The Rout Continues
I got up at 2am on Friday to start the oven on leftover baked beans from the pigpickin’ last Saturday. I’d put them in a disposable aluminum pan, lined with bacon ready to fire up. I set the timed oven for 3 hours. It was the first time I ever used it. At 5am, I awoke from a dream that featured a grasshopper playing the saxophone and slowly realized that what I’d heard was the alarm on the oven. It doesn’t shut off. It just beeps. Useless.
I manually turned off the oven, but the beans were done and ready to carry in to work. Last time I was in Ohio, my friend Wernher had given me a homemade summer sausage to take home with me, advising that it “needed to be hung” about a month to finish ripening. It finished. That would go in too.
On the way in to work, I picked up some ordinary extra sharp cheddar, a store brand, and some Ritz crackers. Bagel crisps were my first choice, but a $3.99 for a small bag they were entirely too trendy.
At work, I got a problem escalation involving a video projector. Video problems are a favorite there and it became a group effort. Next thing you know, a Three Stooges DVD was being projected on the wall, much to the amusement of passers-by.
Three co-workers, meanwhile, had decided to take a half day vacation in the afternoon. That was a trend I could afford. Most people sampling Wernher’s sausage had proclaimed it the best they ever tasted. The got kudos too. I was in no mood to work.
In the parking lot, my fuel-efficient Civic made a disturbing sound just after it started. But it did start. I’d decided to stop by Best Buy on the way home to pick up a DVD player for Liz and an RF modulator for Sister Ruth, so she could get hers working. That went smoothly, but the next attempt to start the car didn’t work.
A crackling sound and I knew it was never going to start. I walked over to Wal-Mart and asked at the customer service desk if they had a phone I could use. The guy pointed at a phone book. Dang me! I almost always carry my cell phone, but decided it wasn’t worth the walk back to my apartment after getting in the car with the beans and all, three trips already.
Back to Best Buy. The greeter there immediately pointed to a phone and even loaned me a pen to scribble down the number for the tow truck. It got pleasant. I sat in the shade on a bench outside and two people came along, sat down, and started talking. The first was a young black girl in a Best Buy uniform. We chatted a bit and finally she asked me if I’d been inside the store. Yes, I had been, and they were very helpful in my moment of need. “Let me ask you something,” She started “…oh no, that’s too silly.” “Nah, go ahead, “ I encouraged, “you’ll probably never see me again.” “Okay,” does it look like it’s blue jeans day in there?” I chuckled, “I don’t remember, but I’d be glad to take a look.” “That’s okay,” she says, and goes in to work wearing her blue jeans..
A short while later (I’m waiting for the red tow truck), a woman with a poodle sits down beside me. “We’re selling our house and had to get out. I had to take the dog along, but they won’t let her in anyplace..” “Just killing time?” I asked and answered “me too” as the tow truck arrived. “There’s my ride.”
Back at Crown Honda, I asked if there was a rental car place nearby. “Yes,” said Gary, handing me his card, “do you want me to call them?” Just a few minutes later, my rental car arrived, and I was completing my strange trip home – only an hour and a half late, despite the complications. I knew this clicking sound on my ignition was not a simple problem. Crown called and said it might be just a battery and maybe we can get it fixed on Saturday. From the beginning, I was thinking Monday, and they never called back so now I’m hoping it’s Monday.
7:28:58 PM 
|
