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United States, North Carolina, Carrboro, English, Paul, Male, 56-60, All Music, All Food.

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Monday, July 26, 2004

Word Abuse   I’m looking forward to Friday morning because it will mean we may never have to hear that disgusting word “presumptive” again. It sounds like it’s a horrible cough, presaging tuberculosis. Some writer with a very cheap Thesaurus got attacked by all 9 muses and chose that word a while back, now all the copycat word bombers are stuck on it like a used-up needle on a scratched vinyl recording. “Ooooie! Look at ME! I can say ‘presumptive’ too!” It would be too much to hope that all the assholes who abused our ears with it get permanent writer’s block.   And while we’re at it, what’s this bit that Kerry needs to “define himself” this week? Is no one covering the political scene today capable of saying anything fucking original whatsoever? Who is the alpha writer who bleats out these catch-phrases to the rest of the herd and gets them started? Has anyone ever got in their car on the way to work and said to themselves, “You know, what I really need to do is define myself today?” Maybe some of these third rate writers should.   6:42:00 PM    comment []

What’s In My CD Player? NEW YORK (Billboard) - The doors to Frank Zappa's vault will be blown wide open via a new series of archival releases under the moniker "Joe's Corsage," a nod both to Zappa's 1979 album "Joe's Garage" and Zappa archivist Joe Travers. …Other Zappa projects in the family pipeline include an edition of the recent "Baby Snakes" DVD with DTS sound and a DVD of the 1971 film "200 Motels," which is said to be the first movie ever shot on video and then transferred to film for theatrical release. Joe Travers is the Bwana Dik of audio engineers. That DTS Baby Snakes DVD is the impossible accomplished miracukously. Joe did that. It began as a discovery… During Joe’s vault tour of duty 2002/3, he uncovered a 4-channel mix (that have existed for (20) years) for the movie soundtrack. This was a matter of great import. According to the vast knowledge that is (aka Joe’s booklet) this mix had never been issued - not even on the prints for theaters. Why? (It exists on 2-inch analog tape reels - 16 of them – & also on a 35 mm mag film - so says the box containing the reel. Yes, & but also in the vault, suddenly more 2-inch tapes labeled by FZ: “Quad Film Tracks” & dated “Sept. 5, 1979” – Dweezil’s 10th birthday. To Joe, the information on the track sheets suggested 4-channel mixes of material from the movie or possibly intended for the movie . . .??!! And the track sheets defined “Quad” as: Front left & right channels, center channel & mono surround channel. Hmmm. Is this not what later became known as Dolby Pro-Logic?). But, alas, UMRK was down. So was Joe. But later, he was able to sync the discovered audio with the video footage and the rest is a great DVD (after a whole shitload of inspired work - this is not trivial, even with the best equipment and software). Back to Joe’s Corsage, here are the tracks… 1. Pretty Pat 2. Motherly Love 3. Plastic People 4. Anyway The Wind Blows 5. I Ain't Got no Heart  6. The Phone Call/My Babe 7. Wedding Dress Song/Handsome Cabin Boy 8. Hitch Hike 9. I'm so Happy I Could Cry 10. Go Cry on Somebody Else's Shoulder 11. How Could I be Such a Fool? 12. We Made Our Reputation Doing it That Way... Something Old, something new. Nice Work, Joe - and I'm looking forward to that 200 Motels DVD. Sorry I made my own, I couldn't wait any longer. 6:07:42 PM    comment []

Come to Darfur and see naked starving children and emaciated donkeys sniffing discarded garments, drawn perhaps by body odors, hoping to find something to eat! Wait, maybe there’s some grain for the donkey in there…       2:18:57 AM    comment []

Occam Burma Shave   When Super-shaved Remember, pard You'll still get slapped But not so hard Burma-Shave   That physical he missed in April 1972, the first after TXANG implementation of drug testing. In 2000, he said he quit using drugs in 1976, the bicentennial year. By his own words, that means he was still a junkie in 1972. Simplest explanation: He didn’t skip the physical, he tested positive for illegal substances. So the “family” cops a “disrespecting the Bing” plea to keep his In-A-Gadda-De-Curriculum-Vitae clean - He “missed” the physical, evidence to the contrary murky or equally “missing.”   2:07:29 AM    comment []

Greenfingers   Them Brits sure know how to do comedy and this film is no exception. A bunch of guys in a minimum security prison, inspired by “Fergus Wilks” (played by David Kelly, who you might remember as the naked bicyclist in Waking Ned Devine), plan and grow a perfect English garden. Sound boring? Yeah, not many mutilations or special effects, but wonderful fully developed characters make for a charming time. Forget the popcorn, munch down on the trifles as you watch this one. My favorite line, delivered by Kelly, when the prison garden is completed: “Now we have heaven under our feet as well as over our heads.” Liz gave it 5 stars.   12:53:06 AM    comment []