Saturday, November 09, 2002

THE AMERICAN HERETIC'S DICTIONARY  definitions: KINGLIER - a story by Shakespeare about a peeping monarch KINGMAKER - Wallis Warfield Simpson KING'S BENCH -  a bus stop rest reserved for royalty KINNIKINICK - relatives I'm able to borrow from  ... okay  (kin-i-can-nick)  KIRSH - what a drunken Gypsy places on an enemy KISMET - to smooch a New York baseball player KIST - smoocht KITCHEN - a young fox's jaw KITE -  Tom KITSCH - the sound of a snake sneeze KITTENISH - a cat box deposit                        *********** The storm rages.  I'm hurrying in case the power goes pffft...no...power goes gzzzzzt or is it thbzzzbpt.  Yeh, that's it.  Also, I need to have a heart to heart with my printer.  He went out to get more ink and didn't come back for hours.  I mean, what is that?    8:55:12 PM    comment []

THE AMERICAN HERETIC'S DICTIONARY definitions: KILTER - a Scotsman KIMBUNDOO - what you step in if you follow a Kimbun KINDLING - s compassionate cod KINDRED - a fear of relatives KING COBRA - Madonna's metal boustiere  (?) ok... (kinko-bra) KING CUP - the palace chalice KINGDOM - Edward VII, who gave up the throne to become "the third mate on an American tramp." KINGFISH - leader of the Mystic Knights Of The Sea... with "Amos and Andy" KINGLET - the rent-a-monarch company                        ************ Got out all the wrapping paper - again - and sat, looking at it - again - then I recalled trying to wrap presents while flying to Christmas dinner.  If you've never been inside a small, private aircraft, please put the accent on the word "SMALL".  Not the exterior, mind you.  Heck no, you want BIG engine, BIG wing surface, BIG props.  But couldn't they have designed the interior a wee bit better?  Front seaters have their legs in a well, straight out, with room to maybe scratch an itch.  Behind seaters have ample room...behind them...in the luggage area, which, I might add, is never big enough for all the luggage.  Okay, all the luggage AND the crap one tends to purchase along the way.  In this setting (I was NOT the pilot this time), I attempted to wrap presents. A wee bit of turbulence and a Barbie was taped to the arm rest, or the tape was now back in the luggage area.  I refused to apologize for the lumpy, crumpled, thrice-taped packages.  Instead, I explained to the kids (the ones who'd believe) that I'd had them wrapped beautifully, but bad-guy baggage handlers had tried to snatch them and there was this terrific wrestling match -- which WE won -- and rescued their presents.  And even though Troy (9) received a tie clasp, and Anna (7) got some -20 degree, Size XL thermals.... everyone was happy.  I was especially happy - I had a straw and the bottle of Bailey's Irish Creme...with tape on it!   10:55:31 AM    comment []