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Friday, October 04, 2002
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re: Dr. Seuss
Here is the full shabang. The vigilant among you will notice that in my previous post I have changed the last two stanzas a bit so that they scan better...
What If Dr. Seuss Wrote Technical Manuals?
Author: Gene Ziegler
A Grandchild's Guide to Using Grandpa's Computer
Bits Bytes Chips Clocks
Bits in bytes on chips in box.
Bytes with bits and chips with clocks.
Chips in box on ether-docks.
Chips with bits come. Chips with bytes come.
Chips with bits and bytes and clocks come.
Look, sir. Look, sir. read the book, sir.
Let's do tricks with bits and bytes, sir.
Let's do tricks with chips and clocks, sir.
First, I'll make a quick trick bit stack.
Then I'll make a quick trick byte stack.
You can make a quick trick chip stack.
You can make a quick trick clock stack.
And here's a new trick on the scene.
Bits in bytes for your machine.
Bytes in words to fill your screen.
Now we come to ticks and tocks, sir.
Try to say this by the clock, sir.
Clocks on chips tick.
Clocks on chips tock.
Eight byte bits tick.
Eight bit bytes tock.
Clocks on chips with eight bit bytes tick.
Chips with clocks and eight byte bits tock.
Here's an easy game to play.
Here's an easy thing to say....
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash,
Then your situation's hopeless, and your system's gonna crash!
You can't say this? What a shame sir!
We'll find you another game sir.
If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
'Cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!
When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary RISC,
Then you have to flash your memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!
Copyright © 1995 by Gene Ziegler.
1:58:33 PM 
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If Dr. Seuss were an IT manager...
Got this from my friend Cheryl. Enjoy and feel free to compose your own stanzas!
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and the bus is interrupted
at a very last resort, and the access of the memory makes your floppy disk
abort, then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, and the double-clicking
icon puts your window in the trash, and your data is corrupted cause the
index doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your system's gonna
crash!
If the label on the cable on the table at your house, says the network is
connected to the button on your mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to
another protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
and your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss, so your icons
in the window are as wavy as a souse; then you may as well reboot it and go out
with a bang, 'cuz as sure as I'm a poet, the poor sucker's gonna hang!
When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy in the disk, and the macro
code instructions cause unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the
memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM, quickly turn off the
computer and be sure to tell your Mom!
12:48:45 PM
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© Copyright 2002 Daniel Dolinov.
Last update: 11/1/2002; 3:34:04 PM.
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