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Tuesday, February 24, 2004
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A new type of bootcamp
They say that in boot camp the drill instructors break you down and then put you together again. I can attest first hand that the statement is somewhat accurate. Of course, neither the breakdown nor the buildup is not in total terms, but the process allows you to internalize a great deal of new habits and skills. I am finding that the same is very much true of a move, especially of a move that you never planed on (having thought that you will be living in the same place for the rest of your life). So, I am about to shortly embark on just such a move. From a not too terribly sleepy quasi-suburban neighborhood I will be moving to a very much awake quasi-urban environment (Cambridge, right outside of Davis Square). I am leaving much behind, both in terms of the person I will no longer be with, as well as numerous physical objects I have acquired over the last seven years. This particular prospect of separation and severing yourself from the familiar can certainly be anxiety inducing. At the same time, such a move involves taking with you one constant – a thing that never leaves you, namely YOU. In my case a good chunk of the material stuff is going with me as well. Both the objects and I will need to learn how to live by ourselves and maybe even practice a bit of willful amnesia as to exactly how we met, but I think it would be pleasant to have a familiar chair or wine glass or tea service in a new place.
Somewhere in the Dune chronicles someone throws in a pearl of wisdom in the words that “the most difficult thing is to endure yourself.” I am not sure I’ve had this particular issue, as I have a veritable maternal attitude towards me – both loving and forgiving. Nevertheless, one must be ready for a rather frank look at oneself when left to a hitherto unaccustomed solitude. The degree to which I will be able to deal with the situation will remain to be seen, but the entire prospect has a tinge of anticipation to it. And we all know that not much can beat anticipation.
11:56:35 PM 
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© Copyright 2004 Daniel Dolinov.
Last update: 3/2/2004; 10:56:16 PM.
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