Reuters photo
"President" Bush delivers the State of the Union address tonight during a joint session of Congress in Washington. His speech was a long string of lies and platitudes.
Freedom, democracy, culture of life, blah blah blah
That's what I heard.
"President" Dumbfuck's State of the Union speech was pretty worthless. It's clear that the quagmire in Iraq is going to continue indefinitely -- and that the Bush regime appears to be making a "case" to invade "axis of evil" member Iran even while Baghdad still burns. And that the Bush regime's "plan" for future generations is for those ridiculously rich people who are in power now to get as much as they can now before they die. Especially if they have donated to the BushCheneyCorp.
So instead of dissecting Dumbfuck's speech point-by-point, as I'm sure all of the pundits are doing, here's a tally of the number of times that he used certain words and phrases in his throwaway speech:
Throwaway words (words that mean nothing through overuse and lack of actual actions to match the words)
"Freedom(s)": 21 times
"Free": Six times
"Democracy," "democracies," "democratic": 15 times
"Liberty," "liberation": Eight
"Security" (not as part of "Social Security"): 10 (Feel safe now?)
Republican weasel words
"Tax relief" (justification for record federal budget deficits that future generations will have to deal with): Two
"Culture of life" (another phrase for "controlling women's uteri"): Two
Republican obsessions
"Terror," "terrorism," "terrorist," "terrorists": 27
"Tax," "taxes," "taxpayer(s)" (all that Republicans really seem to care about, other than war profiteering): Nine
"September 11th, 2001": Surprisingly, just one (well, maybe not so surprisingly: The election is over)
Miscellaneous
The next "pre-emptive" strikes will be on:
"Social Security": 18
"Iran," "Iranian": Three
Conspicuously absent from Dumbfuck's speech:
"Weapons of mass destruction," "WMDs" (referring to any of Iraq's, that is): Zero
"Mistake": Zero
"Body armor": Zero
"Abu Ghraib," "torture," "Geneva Convention": Zero
Almost absent:
"Deficit" (as in "federal budget"): One
OK, I can't resist at least a little dissection. Here are Outright Lies That Would Make Condi Jealous and Laughable Assertions (by no means an exhaustive list):
- "As a new Congress gathers, all of us in the elected branches of government share a great privilege: We have been placed in office by the votes of the people we serve." (This was the first sentence out of his mouth.)
- "And tonight that is a privilege we share with ... a free and sovereign Iraq." (This was the second sentence out of his mouth. Iraq is "free and sovereign"? Then our troops will be coming home immediately, right?)
- "The principle here is clear: A taxpayer dollar must be spent wisely, or not at all." (Um, we're spending billions and billions of taxpayers' dollars on the bogus war in Iraq, the war that BushCheneyCorp started for its cabal of war profiteers. What "Prez" Dumbfuck means is that it's unwise to spend taxpayer dollars on things like health care, education, infrastructure and environmental protection.)
- "Tonight, with a healthy, growing economy, with more Americans going back to work, with our nation an active force for good in the world -- the state of our union is confident and strong." (This is the lowest point of the nation in the 36 years that I've been on the planet in this incarnation.)
- "Over the next several months, on issue after issue, let us do what Americans have always done, and build a better world for our children and grandchildren." (In the same fucking speech, Dumbfuck says that he plans to keep Social Security payments at their current levels for those who right now are 55 and older. The rest of us are fucked. Yet he talks about "[building] a better world for our children and grandchildren.")
- "...and in the last year alone, the United States has added 2.3 million new jobs." This is a lie by omission. Under the reign of King George II, millions of jobs have been lost, so that 2.3 million new jobs last year, if that figure is not inflated (which I doubt), still leaves us with millions of fewer jobs than when Bush took office in 2001. He has not created a single net job during his tenure.
- "Four years of debate is enough -- I urge Congress to pass legislation that makes America more secure and less dependent on foreign energy." Oh, please. The Bush Family Business has been OIL, not solar cookers. BushCheneyCorp invaded Iraq for the oil and for the war profiteering (a way to steal billions and billions of our tax dollars without stealing it outright, because only criminals steal directly).
- "One of America's most important institutions -- a symbol of the trust between generations -- is also in need of wise and effective reform. Social Security was a great moral success of the 20th century, and we must honor its great purposes in this new century. The system, however, on its current path, is headed toward bankruptcy. And so we must join together to strengthen and save Social Security."
- "We will pass along to our children all the freedoms we enjoy -- and chief among them is freedom from fear." Um, remember all of those terrorist alerts before the Nov. 2 election? The Bush regime loves to stoke fear. And at least some of those Iraqi children whose parents and other family members the U.S. military has been killing and maiming probably will want their revenge one day. So how is Bush giving "our children ... freedom from fear" by making the United States even more hated within the Muslim world?
- "During this time of war, we must continue to support our military and give them the tools for victory." Except for body armor. Because as a wise man once said, you have to fight with the army that you have, not with the army that you might wish to have.
- "Other nations around the globe have stood with us.... In the next four years, my administration will continue to build the coalitions that will defeat the dangers of our time." The former members of the "coalition of the willing" are running off the sinking ship U.S.S. Iraq like rats.
- "In the long term, the peace we seek will only be achieved by eliminating the conditions that feed radicalism and ideologies of murder." Hey, I think I actually agree with Dumbfuck on something! His regime, with its "pre-emptive strikes" and prisoner abuse scandals and such, feeds radicalism and ideologies of murder, so if we eliminated his regime, we'd achieve peace.
- "The United States has no right, no desire, and no intention to impose our form of government on anyone else. That is one of the main differences between us and our enemies." Um, we're shoving Texas-style "democracy" down Iraq's throat at gunpoint. We "[have] no intention to impose our form of government on anyone else"? That's funny, 'cause I don't remember the Iraqi people asking us to invade and occupy their nation... The way I remember it, the United Nations said "no" and world opinion said "no" but the Bush regime said "yes."
- "Our men and women in uniform are fighting terrorists in Iraq, so we do not have to face them here at home." Um, before the Bush regime illegally, imorally, uprovokedly and imperialistically invaded Iraq in March 2003, Iraq was not a hotbed of terrorism. It is now because a fundamental belief of many, if not most, Muslims, is that you (a Muslim) don't allow non-Muslims (such as U.S. occupational forces) to occupy historically Muslim lands (such as Iraq). In fact, it was U.S. troops stationed in Saudi Arabia, put there by King George I, that inspired exiled Saudi Osama bin Laden, at least in part, to launch a jihad against the United States, which culminated in 9/11. Nice gig, if you can get it: Incite terrorism and then claim credit for protecting people from it.
- "Recently an Iraqi interpreter said to a reporter, 'Tell America not to abandon us.' He and all Iraqis can be certain: While our military strategy is adapting to circumstances, our commitment remains firm and unchanging." That is true; as long as there is still oil under the sand, the Bush regime will remain in Iraq.
- "Right now, Americans in uniform are serving at posts across the world, often taking great risks on my orders. We have given them training and equipment; and they have given us an example of idealism and character that makes every American proud." Media reports of troops, many of them being reservists, being undertrained for their duties in Iraq, and reports of lack of equipment, most notably body armor, have been rampant. If Dumbfuck says it's so, that our troops have the training and equipment that they need, then is it so?
- "Some of our servicemen and women have survived terrible injuries, and this grateful country will do everything we can to help them recover." Media reports of veterans' benefits being slashed by the Bush regime are rampant. "And we have said farewell to some very good men and women, who died for our freedom, and whose memory this nation will honor forever." OK, a $25 gift certificate for amazon.com (or another online store) goes to anyone who can tell me, convincingly, exactly how any of our troops in Iraq "died for our [Americans'] freedom."* Because Iraq first would have had to pose a threat to our freedom for any of our military personnel to die there for our freedom. The only thing I can see our troops have died for is the war profiteering of Dick Cheney's Halliburton and other oily war-profiteering subsidiaries of BushCheneyCorp.
Finally, I categorize this as (Probably) Unintentional Irony:
First this paragraph: "Because marriage is a sacred institution and the foundation of society, it should not be redefined by activist judges. For the good of families, children, and society, I support a constitutional amendment to protect the institution of marriage."
Immediately following that is this sentence: "Because a society is measured by how it treats the weak and vulnerable, we must strive to build a culture of life."
So essentially it's: "We won't let fags and dykes, a traditionally oppressed minority group, get married. Because a society is measured by how it treats the weak and vulnerable..."
It's gonna be a great four years.
*This is a true offer! If you think you can answer the koan (you can't), you can e-mail me or leave a comment on this post.
1:31:38 AM 
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