CRATE EXPECTATIONS

Polly and I are having relationship issues. However since dogs as a general rule are just Being Dogs and don’t really have “issues”, I’ve discovered the issue is all mine.

She has been having some trouble with separation anxiety. She whines when I’m away from her, even if I’m only taking a shower, and if I leave the apartment without her she scratches the door and howls. She is with me all the time and sleeps in my arms at night.

Like the beginnings of all relationships, the attention is attractive. Especially for someone like myself emerging from shellshock after the recent dramatic end of my last relationship. Polly and my connection has a familiar ring - fall for someone who acts as if their world revolves around you, bask in the glory and then start feeling smothered. I’ve begun altering my schedule around Polly and feeling unable to do anything where I can’t take her.

I sought advice and the solution involves crate training so I’ve bought her a good sized crate and begun following the trainer’s advice. It’s not easy. There are all sorts of boundaries to establish - making sure the crate isn’t thought of as punishment, not letting her see me when she’s inside, teaching her to adjust to being away from me and not letting her think I’ve abandoned her.

I first realized the problem originated with me when the Trainer suggested she sleep in her crate for a few weeks. I panicked at the idea and still have a hard time imagining sleeping without her by my side. However she will learn my love for her does not lessen when we’re apart for brief periods. She’ll learn she has a place of her own to sleep in and that’s ok. I’ll learn I can’t always “fix” everything and it’s possible to have a relationship without compromise.

I wish I’d crate trained my last BF and think in the future I’ll begin to do so.

9:37:43 PM    sro home /