EMPIRE

This past year I went through some major changes. Yes, there’s a whole drama with the circumstances but in the end It all sorted out as It always does. Part of The Change was I extracted myself from a Social Group, notably “gay society”. It wasn’t difficult since my involvement at the time was minimal. Stopping the Gym took care of seventy percent while stopping sex took care of the other thirty. It was not an Agreement or Disagreement with gay culture, I just wanted a change, something I hadn’t already seen for years and years, something else. It was a Scientific Experiment to see if the Subject grows under Various Conditions.

One unexpected side effect was a change in my “Personal Style”. Less about the tight T-shirts, less about the biceps. Less about the pedestal. I shed my skin like a snake. I cut off my tail like a chameleon, enjoying the empty space, and when I was ready to grow one back, I anxiously waited to see what would happen.

What if, instead of a tail, I grew a foot? I’m sure lizards could use an extra foot. What about a Radar, a DVD player? I’m the King here, I do the growing, so why can’t I grow whatever I want, just make it up?

So I put my lizard mind to it and thought about what to make of my new tail. What kind of costume would I create for my Camelot, New Character, King Hugh III?

I like Early 20th Century British Colonialism. Not the Politics, the style. Bet you didn’t see that coming. All those misplaced English gallantly trying to remain proper while the heat, sweat and Sun are everywhere they turn. They have no choice but to adapt and the Romantic notion of moist, unkempt linen was born. Think Lawrence of Arabia, Indiana Jones. But taller. And gay. And with a Beagle named, uh, Polly.

But it was on the right track! An adventurer. Hey, I’m liking that! The shorts became less Surfer and more Distressed. Indiana Jones and The Temple of A&F. Works for me! Casual but tuned. Laid back, digging the vibes, smoking the... Ok, I got it. I was thinking Bohemian. Yeah, man. From Bohemia. Artist, poet. On The Road, Jackie and Me. Beatniks. But no hats. Aw, man... you always gotta ruin it for everyone.

So finally It’s Arrived. My tail. I have to say, we’re all very proud around here at the castle. It’s been rough but we think we have a winner. The baggy cargo shorts, the big cotton shirts, the black leather sandals. Cute. In a, you know, Big Franchise kinda way. Bottom line is what makes King Hugh happy. That’s always the goal when He gets New Clothes.

5:38:58 PM    sro home /