WRISTWATCH


From a NYT’s article, Darwin-Free Fun for Creationists :

PENSACOLA, Fla., April 29 — Robert and Schön Passmore took their children to Disney World last fall and left bitterly disappointed. As Christians who reject evolutionary theory, the family scoffed at the park's dinosaur attractions, which date the apatosaurus, brachiosaurus and the like to prehistoric times.

"My kids kept recognizing flaws in the presentation," said Mrs. Passmore, of Jackson, Ala. "You know — the whole `millions of years ago dinosaurs ruled the earth' thing."


Dear Ms. Passmore,

It may startle you to know that a Fag living in Los Angeles, the Hellhole of the Universe, actually agrees with you. Yeah, really. I too am sick of that whole “millions of years ago dinosaurs ruled the earth” thing. It’s so Nineties, so Michael Eisner, and we know where that leads. Oh, we rule the Earth! Oh, we’re so large! Oh, we’re in cartoons! Big fucking deal... oops, I mean, Crap! Not so big now, are ya Dinosaurs?

As a matter of fact, I think we should just throw in, you know, the whole “concept of time” thing. Toss it. All our mundane infatuation with “the past” and “the future” and how long it took to make everything the way it looks now. Maybe (wink wink) “God” did create the dinosaurs the day before he made us. As a matter of fact, the more I think about it the more likely it sounds. “He” made the dinosaurs and their skeletons just to fuck with our heads. It’s what we here in Gomorrah call “Punk’d” and if there’s one thing I know it’s God does love a good joke.

So we build museums and movies and on Friends Ross gets a woody for them. It’s gotten so God can’t look at a thing without bursting into a giggle. Man, oh man (literally), you fell for the Dinosaur thing! You fell for the whole “we only exist linearly” thing. You fell for the whole “compulsion for an explanation” thing, the need to know, the Things Have To Be This Way thing. Side splitters. Best of luck to you when your kids realize Life doesn’t fit on a calender.

See ya in the Ice Age - SRO

P.S. Speaking of jokes, I bet your last name gets a big har-har every Thanksgiving. I’m just saying. Don’t even get me started on that whole “Indian” thing.

11:52:48 AM    sro home /