KIBBLE

Britney gets a pooch.

Aw fuckin’ Christ. What is her problem? Did I pee? I don’t think so. Maybe I did. Eh, I’m a puppy, give me a break. I wanna play. I wanna play. I wanna play. Oh man, what was that noise? Was that her? Fuck. Please god, let me have a crate wherever I go. Quit squeezing me so tight! I’m not your cracker- ass boyfriend. I wanna play. I wanna play. I wanna play. Ok, now I really do have to pee. Maybe just a little so she thinks it’s her crying. Jussssttt a little. Whew, that’s better. Damn, she’s screaming again. Swears like a trucker. Do you lick other dog’s butts with that mouth? I wanna play. I wanna play. I wanna play. What was that? No, really, I heard something. I can’t see a goddamn thing. I’ll whine a little. Mmm-mmm. She can’t even hear me. She probably thinks it’s her cell. Should I bark? Maybe if I growl she’ll put me down. Oops, bad choice of words. I meant maybe she’ll set me down. I am so screwed. Doggy-style. I just know I’m gonna end up with a bow and an outfit. This has got to be the worst day of my life and it’s happening seven times faster than hers. Jesus. Oh well. I wanna play. I wanna play, I wanna play.

3:17:51 PM    sro home /