MV05

24 hours and counting until “Mother Visit 05”. We here at Headquarters have begun preparation for the visit of Her Eminence (code name : Old Woman). We’ve had the Chariot and the Castle cleaned, thanks to Mexican Minions. Rather nice, if I say so myself, but we are staying on Orange Alert to avoid Backsliding. Hanging things up, Precision Peeing, minimal dish usage. Things of that sort.

I’ve arranged for OW to be escorted gate to gate in Houston for her connecting flight. She knows not to freak if an Airline Employee approaches. She’s been briefed that “if they offer a wheelchair, for god’s sake just use it.” She doesn’t need one but just do what they say, Old Woman.

Unfortunately the OW doesn’t entertain herself easily as Headquarters Staff (Polly, Betty and Me). I could spend hours just talking or not talking. The internet, Polly and my Attention to Detail keep my hands and head full. Mumsy, on the other hand, embraces sitting in a chair as Doing Something.

Naturally, I am Oedipally torn by my conflicting presumptions about the itinerary of MV05.

Option A : On one hand, I too sit on a bench at the Dog Park - Not So Different than Sitting In Chair. I also label going to the Dog Park (to sit) as Doing Something. Perhaps she actually likes Sitting in Chair and who am I to deny her?

Option B : Or not. Everyone (unfortunately) isn’t as “pointed” re: expressing self as I am. She’s possibly bored and too polite to complain, a black mark on my Hosting Skills. Should I insist like some coked-up Cruise Director that she constantly Participate? I’m puzzled when people act this way to me. Then again, I’m often puzzled by people in general.

Option C : Stop making up shit about “How she thinks”. You have no idea what will happen during MV05. Sure, you can wile away the hours scheming possible scenarios, wasting your time at Fret Central but please, give us a break. It’s all mental masturbation. Yes, thank you Betty.

So much for the Pie Charts and Powerpoint presentations. Honestly, having guests is alot of work. Especially for an event that’ll be over before I know it.

11:54:29 AM    sro home /