MOTHER VISIT 05 : DAY 01


7:35 AM

I’m awakened by a phone call from my shrieking sister. I’d been in the middle of a particularly vivid dream in which I was best friends with Barbra Streisand. No shit.

Barbra not only smokes, but she rolls her own cigarettes. I knew we were Best Friends because she asked me to give a looksy at a script she wrote, one I vaguely glanced over and on every other page were words like ABORTION in huge-ass letters amongst her scribbled notes. Needless to say, it was an excellent dream. DAMN YOU, SISTER!

10:45

At the airport. No mother.

11:30

No Mother

12:30

Still no Mother. Shrieking sister ++5. You should have met her at the gate!!!

4:00

I’m in the Police Station at LAX filling out a Missing Person Report. Are there any distinguishing characteristics? Uh... she watches Willard ... alot. Perhaps the Kidnappers will give Mother up due to excessive requests to catch Crispin Glover train feral rats again and again. Suddenly, the phone rings and all the cops rush over to hear. She’d missed her flight in Houston and was now at Baggage Claim in LAX as planned.

5:30

In my apartment having well-deserved cocktails. My Aunt Fran calls, alerted by the troops. All is fine. The plan had actually gone as envisioned. False alarm. We are deservedly intoxicated while Polly wonders "Who is this woman in Our Space?"

8:29:55 PM    sro home /