Monday, April 14, 2003

Mercedes has been a little bit sick for a couple of days--just a stuffed up nose and a little sneezing. It might be allergies. At any rate, she's been just incredibly sweet over the weekend. In a great mood, but feeling slightly under the weather, so she wants to sit on laps, or play quietly, and just be overwhelmingly affectionate. When she's that sweet, it's almost painful to look at her at times. I think you have to be a parent to know what I mean. Usually I love her (and Reeve) normally, and sometimes they each drive me batty. But then she does or says something, or acts a certain way, and I just melt, and it's totally, totally great. It's been like that for 36 hours at least. Yesterday afternoon I went up to the local sandwich shop to get us all some lunch. There was a man heading down the sidewalk in a wheelchair--he probably had cerebral palsy--and he only had the use of one foot, which he was using to operate the steering apparatus of the chair. This is unusual, for two reasons--one, because Tunisia isn't like Egypt or India, where sadly deformed people are everywhere. And two, because this guy had a modern-style electric wheelchair, which is great. Nonetheless, I almost broke down right then and there looking at this poor man. I'm not the type of person who generally gets really emotional over the sad predicament that some poor people end up in. I can acknowledge tragedy without having sympathetic overload. But this is the second time since I became a parent that I have nearly cried in public upon seeing someone with a physical disability. I find myself feeling incredibly fortunate that Reeve and Mercedes are healthy and happy, and then imagining how difficult it must be not only to be in that position, but to be the parent of a child with a physical or mental disability, and it's too devastating to think about very much. Not sure why this hasn't happened more often. Something about the circumstances making me vulnerable, I guess. Yesterday was a staggeringly gorgeous day, my daughters were sweet and funny and fun and perfect, and maybe the jarring reality that it wasn't a perfect day for everybody was too much for me. I bought my sandwiches and headed home to see my kids. 12:46:14 PM    Let's hear it. []