Bad Animals
An old discussion is reborn. A comprehesive list of contenders has been presented on Hyperbole. It is an impressive collection of beasts, to which I would only add one more name: The Short-tailed Shrew, I feel deserves a special mention. Consider the words of Roger Caras in his landmark 1964 book "Dangerous to Man-Wild Animals: A Definitive Study of Their Reputed Dangers to Man", on page 80:
"...It eats an absolutely amazing quantity of insects, worms, arachnids, slugs, and other animal prey, and will turn to cannibalism if denied other food for a few hours. It is apparently almost constantly in a "rage" which is magnified by its atom-splitting metabolism...If it was as big as a collie, and kept the same rate of metabolism, it would be far and away the most dangerous animal alive, venom glands or no. What a really large shrew could do to the natural balance of any region is terrifying to contemplate"

Fortunately, shrews are not as big as collies. I can't offer any personal disagreement with Jim's conclusion that the Great White shark is the Baddest Animal. However, it should be noted that this discussion is now some 10 years old; it should also be noted that Jim and I really don't know much about animals. So, it seemed only appropriate that we check for recent developments or seek out opinions for people more learned than ourselves on the subject.
Naturally, I turned to Google. The first thing I did was a simple search for the words "is the baddest animal". Two relevant hits come up (the other was for Eric Burdon...). One spot makes a flippant comment that the T. Rex is the baddest animal that ever lived (True, but dead. Doesn't count.); the other site is from a kindergarten lesson plan. A student named Voshon knows what time it is when it comes to sharks; he even drew a picture that I thought was nice enough to link to.
Well, that's all well and good, Voshon, but we all know how arbitrary language and the internet can be. We're going to need to do a few more searches, just to make sure we get all of our bases covered. Such as:
"is the toughest animal"-Well, here's what I get for that search...
a Black Bear is the toughest animal in the Maine woods
The polar bear is the toughest animal in the Arctic
the murrelet is the toughest animal I've ever tried to capture on film
The mule deer is the toughest animal in the state to hunt, in my opinion
I sometimes think the Australian Blue Cattle Dog is the toughest animal alive
Based on this comparison it would seem that my .22 is overkill but they still crawl. This proves that the squirrel is the toughest animal on earth!
OK. That was fun. Let's try "deadliest animal"
The sea wasp, a type of box jelly, is probably the deadliest animal in the ocean—more dangerous to humans than any shark
How about "hardest animal to kill"
The hardest animal to kill in Illinois is a school mascot
My old coach used to say the hardest animal to kill is a cornered animal. That’s where we are right now
Don't be fooled in thinking that elephants are the hardest animal to kill- They're easy
Finally, let's see what pops up with "scariest animal"
According to your online poll, Cujo was voted the scariest animal and yet didn't make the list
Humans!" he cries in his still-cheery Aussie pitch. "The scariest animal on the planet.
What was the most scariest animal you have encountered and why? Steve Leonard: Probably the great white shark
Perhaps, the scariest animal we saw was a baby fer de lance, a deadly little snake.
I am the most scariest animal!" "Who will win the gymnastic tournament?" "I will," growled the gorilla. "I have strong arms.".
"The scariest animal in Labyrinth is David Bowie's hair"
Walruses are the scariest animal ever. First of all, look at it. It's nothing but a lump with tusks
The first thing he said after we exchanged hellos was "Who's got the roast?" Great, he's a trendy pot-head, the scariest animal there is
Finally, I must leave you with the words cited by Natalie Danielson, freshman volleyball player for Spokane Community College, as her inspiration:
Inspiration: “Contrary to what most people believe, the scariest animal is not a tiger or even a bear. It is a elephant with a shark on it’s back, running around trampeling and eating everything in it’s path.” –Jack Handey
5:55:41 PM
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