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Monday, August 11, 2003
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This Week in Archaeology: Caligula Really Was Crazy!
Turns out a new archaeological dig shows that Caligula really did think he was a god, and had his palace connected to some of Rome's holiest structures.
Ever seen the movie Caligula? I have, and let me tell you, it sucks. It was one of those movies you hear about being "racy" and even being "x-rated" and whatever, so you get to high school and you can rent movies and you figure you really need to see Caligula. Me and my friend Clinton checked it out. It was more hilarious than anything. Malcolm McDowell plays Caligula, and all I can remember from his performance is that he lathered up his fist in grease and pulled a Kobe (if you believe the rumors) on a lot of men and women in the movie. But you know, he was the emperor, and it was Rome, so that was all part of getting through your day back then.
There are these other scenes where there are just these massive gold penis statues on the deck of this boat which serve absolutely no purpose whatsoever. It's like Bob Guccione (of Penthouse fame, also a director of the movie) had some props from some old Penthouse shoots sitting around, and just threw them on the deck of the boat. "Hey, everybody! Here comes Emperor Caligula and his Big Dick Boat!"
Peter O'Toole, John Gielgud and Helen Mirren are also in this movie. That's a lot of talent for a movie that sucks as bad as Caligula.
Anyway, the relevance of the archaeological dig is that it wasn't known just how crazy Caligula was. There were suspicions that maybe some people made up stories about him after his death to make him look bad. You know, people like Bob Guccione. But it turns out, Caligula had a really big palace, and the archaelogists tell us that means he was crazy. That, and the fact that the front door to his palace said "Caligula's Sodomy Shack" in Latin.
Isn't archaeology fun? Tune in next week, when we use archaeology to confirm that the Mayans built pyramids.
3:49:14 PM 
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Heavy Reading on the WMD Deception
Check out this piece from the Sunday Washington Post. It is an incredibly detailed description of how the public depiction of Iraq's nuclear threat differed from the known uncertainties of the Iraqi nuclear program.
I can understand why the Administration was suspicious of Iraq's intention to build a nuclear weapon. But that does not, in any way, excuse intentionally misrepresenting evidence and intelligence to make the case stronger to gain support for a pre-emptive strike. The trangressions range from simple miscalculations to violations of the most basic rules of factual representation, like leaving off the second half of quotes which invalidate the first half, but only using the first half when it suits your needs. I think a good rule of thumb is: If it's the kind of misrepresentation of facts that would cause you to lose a high school debate round, it probably shouldn't be used to go to war, either.
I get the feeling that the Administration's take, as well as the take of people who support Bush, is that the ends justified the means in this case. In other words, yeah, OK, maybe the nuclear threat was exaggerated knowingly, but that was only to get people to get on board with the war, and the war was a very necessary thing.
Seems risky to me, if that is indeed the feeling. It assumes that the nuclear claims were in fact key in gathering support for the war. What, you don't think phrases like "mushroom cloud" carry a special influential meaning?
As John Dean said, this is potentially an impeachable offense. They intentionally misled the public into supporting a war, and misused intelligence information to do it. But Dean's last paragraph is probably prophetic:
Nixon claimed that his misuses of the federal agencies for his political purposes were in the interest of national security. The same kind of thinking might lead a President to manipulate and misuse national security agencies or their intelligence to create a phony reason to lead the nation into a politically desirable war.
1:21:17 PM
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Gregory Hines
Gregory Hines died of cancer yesterday. I'm not a dance enthusiast, so I don't have a full appreciation for his career. Nor, for that matter, do I know anything about Broadway, where Hines was also a major star.
But I have seen a few of Hines' movies, and I always liked him. In reading his obit columns, I have noticed that none mention his 1986 movie Running Scared, a buddy picture where Hines and Billy Crystal play a couple of cops out to bust a drug kingpin.
It's a pretty decent movie, as the '80s go. For one thing, you won't find a better Chicago movie. I mean, they go to every big landmark and little dive bar in Chi-town. I still see places in the Windy City that make me think of that movie. And there is this climactic shoot-out in a large glass-ceilinged office building that I still think about when I'm in a glass-ceilinged office building.
Probably a hard movie to find these days. Too bad.
So long, Gregory Hines. It's not often that people achieve high status in three different fields. He was only 57.
11:59:25 AM
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Instant Family Room
We had the carpet installed in our basement on Friday. It was awesome. Our house is nothing but tile and hardwood floors, which I like. But I grew up with carpet, and there's just something about rolling around on a carpeted floor that is conduscive to playfulness. I left in the morning and it was a dusty, plywood sub-floored construction area; I came back and it was an Instant Family Room.
So that ruled.
Then, as I walked in the door coming home from work on Friday, eager to go down and see our new carpet, I was distracted by two large boxes that had come in the mail for Linus. They were a birthday present from Friends of Pipeline Brent and Gretchen in KC. One was a Hot Wheel car carrier, in the shape of a big rig truck. Linus loved that, and we got so distracted by playing with it that we forgot for a moment that there was a second, larger box. I opened that to find some Hot Wheel cars, and two other gifts which ended up being a PlayStation 2 and two games (which Linus could not play, but I sure can).
I was flabbergasted by this. Brent is a clever sort-he knows that Linus and I will, if not right now, soon have hours of fun playing with that. He has gone so over and beyond the call of duty, I can't fathom it. Brent knows my deep-seated desires for advanced gaming, which have gone unfulfilled mostly due to Jane's protestations. But I had a plan to win her over.
We went out Saturday and bought the new TV for the basement, and also got a game Linus could at least start to play. It was the Namco Classics game, which has Pac Man, Ms. Pac Man, Galaga, Galaxian, Dig Dug and Pole Position on it. Linus took a shine to Galaga, though I can see a lot of Ms. Pac Man in his future.
Jane and I stayed up late Saturday just playing these old school games. I felt like I was on a date in 8th grade all over again. The games are nearly exact replicas of the arcade versions, so they really take you back in time. I felt like I should go put on parachute pants and get a really bad haircut. It was awesome.
Some thoughts on the games themselves:
Jane asked what the essential difference was between Pac Man and Ms. Pac Man. I wasn't really sure, because I had probably only played Pac Man twice in my life, whereas I was a serious Ms. Pac Man hound. But why one, and not the other? Well, given the ability to make a side-by-side comparison, it was clear that Pac Man sucked. The graphics are lame, the screens don't change as much, and the fruit doesn't march around the screen. Marching fruit is a must-have.
But for each of these games, there is an updated version. So, for example, Namco put a "modernized" version of Galaga, Pac Man, and Dig Dug on this disc. The Galaga update is freakin' awesome. Same essential game, but you can get better guns, and the graphics are dazzling, to the point of being dangerously hypnotic.
The bonus is, the PS2 is going to turn me into a modern-day Adonis. I now have my exercise bike set up downstairs. I can ride and play PS2 at the same time! But it has its dangers, too. I played a full baseball game in my MVP Baseball league last night. Took me about 50 minutes, and I was riding the whole time. I typically would only ride for 20 minutes. I could barely walk up the stairs when I was done, and I'm hurting bad today.
But it's that kind of multi-tasking that's going to win over Jane's support for video-gaming, and I am dedicated to the task.
10:25:30 AM
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© Copyright 2003 Doug Hennessee.
Last update: 9/2/2003; 10:37:56 AM.
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