Telling The Truth

You say you want to get spiritual? You want to get right with God? You want to be connected to the Creator, the one who made the heavens and breathed life into the world?

You think you might want that? Okay. Why don’t you start with something simple? Start by admitting the truth about yourself. Let no creed, tradition, reputation, or religion hold you back. If it is true about you, own up to it and let the chips fall where they may.

Maybe you’re a Christian; maybe you’re an atheist; maybe you’re a lapsed Catholic; maybe you’re an unbeliever.

Maybe you’re scared and you don’t know why; maybe you don’t give a shit anymore; maybe you talk to animals; maybe you step on cracks and still whisper, “break your momma’s back.”

You stare at the sky; you eat the insides of your cheeks; you sneak spoonfuls of white sugar; you like to fart in the tub; you cuss like a sailor; you’d rather buy a DVD than feed the children; you’re deep in debt and panicked about it.

You heard me. Own it, confess it, shout it to the heavens if you need to.

Let this be your new creed: Cause no harm to others with your confessions, but do not be afraid to rock the living hell out of the boat. The truth is worth it. The truth is absolutely worth it.

The best thing that can happen is if you tell the truth, pay the price, and find that you have nothing left to lose.

Spirituality always begins in your lowest places and works its way upwards and outwards from there. If you try to start this journey with external things, like helping others for example, the chickens will eventually come home not only to roost but to kick your ass. Try to sweep this house clean and your demons will return and bring their drinking buddies with them. Trust me on this one. I’ve tried everything and had my ass kicked so many times that I’ve lost count.

Me, I’m a quiet man who can suddenly leap to his feet and start talking right in front of everyone. I know how to talk to people, God help me. Sometimes I think that I would like to stay silent and quit talking so much, but that’s a lie. I love to talk.

I have thoughtful eyes that are slowly being covered up as my eyebrows sag. My hair is thinning and lines are appearing on my face. I don’t think that I’m very handsome, but I used to be. People said I was a good-looking young man. It surprises me that I don’t miss that, but I don’t. I have other things to think about now.

I crave immediate and intense gratification because I live mainly in the moment. Because of this, I can be rather selfish and undisciplined. I’m selfish with my moments, but not so much with my life.

I am obsessive when it comes to writing and somewhat compulsive about it. Sometimes it feels like an addiction. I write because I’m afraid to say some things out loud. I’m afraid that if people know what is inside me, they will have the power to hurt me. When I write I become brave because in that moment, everyone else seems too far away to matter.

I’m very good with words, and that is a dangerous thing. I sense that my soul is in great peril with Real Live Preacher, and yet it is a good thing for me to write. I hope you will pray for me because sometimes I start to think that I'm someone special because of all the attention I’ve been getting. But that is a terrible lie, and if I ever start believing it, Real Live Preacher will die. That’s the truth.

Some people say that I’m a liberal Christian, but I don’t think of myself that way. I don’t want to be a liberal or a conservative.

I want to be a surprise.

rlp

© Copyright 2005 Preacher. Last update: 7/17/2005; 8:24:49 PM. Links