Meme, hell. We need a candidate!
I am thoroughly fascinated by Rayne’s Build-A-Meme Project. It’s why I have semi-seriously nominated her to take The Raven’s place as our unofficial leader. Not that we need one. But I support our troops.
This sort of thing is what bloggers do very well. We can cast aside the rules that always seem to result in having to vote for the lesser of two (or more) evils.
There is even a Meme Manifesto fermenting in the Byzantine recesses of my overtaxed brain. That will come later. Right now, I’m putting the finishing touches on the June issue of Business Pulse. That involves about five 16-hour days of very intense writing. Suffice it to say that I won’t be able to get into this meme thingy until later this week. But get into it I will. It will be a welcome change from writing about the Bonneville Power Administration’s proposed rate increase and the ramifications thereof.
There is one thing I can write about immediately. It becomes instantly obvious to me that we can create the Zeus, the Jupiter, the Ahura-Mazda of all memes, but it won’t do a damn bit of good unless there’s a candidate who can pull it off.
Allow me to suggest some specifications. The ideal candidate can be male or female, black, white, red, yellow or any combination thereof. But certain basics are mandatory. The Candidate should be as good looking as John Edwards, have the charisma of Bill Clinton, the tenacity of Hillary Clinton, the single-minded intensity of Ralph Nader, the integrity of Walter Cronkite, the idealism of Eugene McCarthy, the business acumen of Bill Gates, the compassion of Mother Theresa, the diplomatic skills of George C. Marshall (look him up, kids), the political cunning of Machiavelli, the eloquence of Daniel Webster, the humility of Gandhi, the chutzpah of Martha Stewart, the sex appeal of JLo, the intellect of Stephen Hawking, the artistic soul of Pablo Picasso, and the ability to get on base of Ichiro. Feel free to add to this list if you feel there is something I have left out.
This should not be a problem. We have the technology (remember the Six-Million Dollar Man? That was before inflation.). There has to be someone out there who can build us The Candidate. Surely, Hollywood does not have a lock on mad scientists. If Salon bloggers can build the perfect meme, there has to be a Dr. Strangecakes who can construct the perfect Candidate.
Otherwise, I fear, we may be wasting our time.
11:37:50 PM 
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