Slow blogging ahead
(and behind)
I may be taking a temporary vacation from blogging. Last Monday, after coming home from work, I ran into a brick wall of fatigue. I literally went non-functional. There was no pain or trouble breathing, so I ruled out a coronary. The fact that I could still use my limbs and my brain, although in a diminished form, seemed to rule out a stroke.
Suddenly, however, I seemed to be about my father's age. The only thing I can compare it to was the time when I was a public broadcasting executive and burned out after too many 80 hour weeks. That diagnosis seems to fit. As my father's caregiver, I am spending more and more time trying to keep up with his increasing demands.
It tends to be very stressful given the emotional baggage we both bring to the situation. My daughter, bless her sweet soul, goes out of her way to give me the respite I so desperately need from time to time, but I can never really leave my responsibilities behind. Now that snowboarding season is over, that therapy is on hold until the snow flies again. Usually, I transition to hiking, tennis and canoeing in the summer, but that doesn't seem very possible this year.
Part of it is family tradition. We do not put our elders into nursing homes unless it becomes absolutely necessary. My parents cared for my grandmother for years. My aunt cared for her uncle for years. To quote the wife of one of our esteemed bloggers, "It's what we do."
What we do can be a bitch and it caught up to me last week. So I have spent a lot of time lying in the weeds and trying to reclaim my usual energy and optimism. Blogging is just too much to contemplate. So I am taking another hiatus until my mind and body recover.
Having sung my swan song several times before, I know better than to announce my retirement. It gets embarrassing when I hang up my spikes in public then come back after a couple of weeks off.
I don't know how long I will be on the DL this time, but rest assured I will be back. Something will piss me off enough to generate some writing energy or I will find some photo op that I want to share. Meantime, accept my apologies and leave the porch light on for me.
12:02:14 AM 
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