Computer Blues
Arrghh! The big box booted up yesterday with the sort of grinding racket you’d get if you dropped gravel into a coffee mill. Not right. Not good. My skilled computer wizard judgement was: Fan dying. Clearly indicated remedy: Replace fan.
Result: computer dis-assembled on desk, with POSSLQ (Person of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters…also known as "she who must be obeyed") wondering under her breath why I hadn’t done a better job of transferring all her work files to the lap top.
Actually I have, but the cobbled together solution of lap top/ zip drive/ cd copy of back ups, including exe.files is not exactly simplicity itself to use.
I’m working on it, I’m working on it.
In The Meantime…
…let me offer the following, which drifted around the web some time ago. I was reminded of it by a story on NPR this morning.
WARNING: In light of the rising frequency of human-grizzly bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising bikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears while in the field. We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear.
Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear dung. Black bear dung is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear dung has little bells in it and smells like pepper spray.
I'll be back later...be the Good Lord willin' and the creeks don't rise.
The Intractable Perversity of Electro-Mechanical Stuff--Later, At The End of The day
When we left the wizard he had bits of his computer scattered across a desk, his keen intelligence focused on what was obviously a failing fan. This computer is affectionately known as "the big box." It is rather like an old Harley Davidson, a triumph of development over design. It has been added to, upgraded, modified, tweaked. It contains our lives on its mighty 6gig hard drive. It is apparently conscious.
So…once out of the box I performed a series of technical tests. I plugged it in. Then I bent an ear to each of its two fans in turn. What I heard was the sound of silence. The hard drive was its old self. I donned a face mask and pressure dusted a small Sahara, cat hair and… honest to God… a bug out of its nooks and crannies.
I left it off for six hours. It booted up silently. I put it back together.
Here’s the question: Was there ever anything wrong at all? Or was a kind of feral consciousness at work, cleverly counterfeiting the noises of mechanical collapse. Did it just want a bath? The truth is out there.
