Forgiveness III

In 12 Step Groups they talk about the "disease of forgetfulness," the one where you forget that you can't handle just one drink/donut/etc., the one where you forget how bad it feels when you go on a toot/binge/other excess, the one where you forget all promises to loved ones, loved ones themselves, and any goals you may have formed in the odd sober moment, as well as any information that might possibly help you. That disease.

While cleaning house today I picked up a church bulletin from 2 weeks ago. I laughed at the sermon title: Forgiveness. Laughed because I totally forgot that I'd heard this sermon, a sure sign that I needed it.

Since I took notes, I'll give you the recap. Unity Church of the Hills has it on tape if you want to hear the original.

First Rev. Ron outlined the things that pass for forgiveness but really aren't, like:

• The mechanical kind, like when someone says, "Oh, please forgive me," and you automatically answer, "Sure."
• The obligatory kind, such as when you receive apologies inspired by "You better say you're sorry right now."
• The pretending kind, when you're still really, really angry
• The gracious (top-down) kind given in arrogance to the miserable worm who hurt you
• The excusing kind that says things like, "He was doing the best he could" with the subtext of "And it should be against the law and punishable by life."

Then he pointed out that the root word means "cancel"... "untie"..."let loose."

Rosely aside: This resonates with Carolyn Myss ' definition of no longer putting energy into the situation.

His final suggestion was to view every hurt as an opportunity for healing, and the other person as your partner in healing. When you think about it, it makes sense: You couldn't be hurt if you didn't have expectations, attachments, or previous hurts in the same place. It's also a future-looking attitude instead of a past-looking one.

Thanks for the good thoughts, Rev. Ron. I've got the bulletin posted by computer. The cover image is a red crystal cross with these words over it: "Forgive and you will be forgiven."

If we ever stop to think as we mumble through the Lord's Prayer that we're asking to be forgiven in the same way we forgive others, we'd either pray a lot less or a lot more.

3:04:29 PM    

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Mysteries O' Life

In 10 years I've had 6 addresses. All six garbage collection agencies said to have the trash on the curb by 7 am. Garbage trucks run all day long. I've seen them. So how come I always live where they arrive at 7 am, if not before?

2:14:26 PM    

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