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Monday, March 31, 2003 |
"Fair and Balanced" Journalism At Its Finest: A Monster Limo NYC Report
On March 27, anti-war demonstrators staged various acts of civil disobedience around New York City in an effort to protest the war and corporate media's coverage of it. In response, Fox News altered the electronic news ticker at their 6th Avenue headquarters to display jokes and comments ridiculing the protesters, instead of news headlines. Since Fox is a major news organization, and since its own slogan promises "Fair and Balanced Journalism. We Report. You Decide", I'd like our readers to consider the following quotes (all of which appeared on the Fox News ticker that day) and decide for themselves. Is this what fair and balanced journalism looks like to you? Is this acceptable behavior for a news organization?
"War Protestor Auditions Here Today... Thank You for Coming! The Cleverest Sign Wins a Week's Free Vacation... In Baghdad"
"Attention Protestors: The Michael Moore Fan Club Meets on Thursdays at the Phone Booth on 6th and 50th"
"How Do You Keep Protestors in Suspense? You Ignore Them"
"Fox News Holds First Annual Bring a Protestor to Work Day... Awww, Ain't that Cute?"
"Yell As Loud As You Want, We're Still Not Hiring Phil Donahue"
"Yell If You Didn't Have Sex Last Night... That's What We Thought"
"Who Won Your Right to Show up Here Today? Protestors or Soldiers?"
And while Fox News execs were using their multi-billion dollar company as a forum for their own sophomoric rants cleverly disguised as news, other people in town were being punched in the face by the NYPD.
- M.C. No Shame
4:21:48 PM
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We Must Strike Now While the Peacenik Pope is Weak!

2:57:12 PM
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WING-NUT OF THE DAY!
Baton
Rouge DJ Urges Violence Against Americans, Canada At first I was going
to post every link I could find of violence used by pro-war demonstrators
and propagandists, thinking it would make some kind of point. Then I
realized: These people are in favor of violence overseas, so they are
merely being ideologically consistent when endorsing violence at home. They
like war so damn much they wish there could be a war everywhere, not just
Iraq! It all makes sense now.
-Consider Arms
2:10:43 PM
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TODAY'S TOP FIVE
Iraqi Refugees Feed Hungry Marines Yep,
you read that right. It's not the other way around; supply lines have been
so disrupted by guerrillas that the Iraqis are now feeding our hungry
Marines. Mr. Rumsfeld, you are indeed a genius. There were no flaws in
your battle whatsoever (and I'm glad NBC fired Peter Arnett for suggesting
that there might be. As this story shows, our initial war plans have not in
any way needed revision).
US Soldiers Asked
to Pray for Bush This is a humdinger, as we say in Flyover Country. A
born again group called In Touch Ministries has distributed a pamphlet
called "A Christian's Duty" to Marines which includes the instructions to
pray for the President. Today's prayer: "Pray that the President and his
advisers will be strong and courageous to do what is right regardless of
critics." Critics like the Pope, incidentally.
Were Marines Killed by Friendly
Fire? One of these Marines was from a town nearby, and the news has been
full of denunciations of the way he died: Murdered by cowardly Iraqis who
pretended to surrender before turning their guns on the Marines. Now,
however, the military is investigating the possibility that the men were
killed by US aircraft.
At Least We're
Not Planning to Bomb New Zealand The US is considering "economic
retaliation" against New Zealand because that country's government opposes
war and has refused to commit funds to the "reconstruction" of Iraq without
a UN mandate. When did our government become like the Capone gang?
"We had a great day. We killed a lot of people. We dropped a few
civilians, but what can you do?" Hermann Rauschning, the German
politician who fought in World War I and later fled Nazi Germany, once wrote
that military service can ennoble those who are born to it, but in the
"majority of unmilitary souls, it breeds only brutality."
-Consider Arms
1:56:04 PM
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Fred Durst in "Not a Complete Idiot" Shock Remember all the snickering over Fred Durst's use of the word "agreeance" during his anti-war remarks at the Grammys this month? Well, according to the North American editor of the Oxford English Dictionary, not only is "agreeance" a word, but Durst used it correctly (where was the French toast guy on this one? You're blowing it, dude)! Granted, the last date the OED has for its usage is 1714, but obviously Mr. Durst is more of a scholar than we all thought. Boy, first he sleeps with Britney Spears, then he pulls out some archaic grammar stylings: If he'd only stop making music forever, we'd probably stop loathing him.
- Consider Arms
8:48:38 AM
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And maybe it takes the deaths of cute stuff like kids and dolphins and monkeys (all current and likely causalities of the war, believe it or not) to get people angry, but I think this is a pretty poignant reminder of why war isn't a decision to take lightly as well.
- Marcus-Marcus
8:48:30 AM
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All the Pentagon's talk about being careful and using precision guided missiles and doing their best to avoid "collateral damage" (a term so callous I have to put it in quotes) starts to sound pretty fucking stupid and irrelevant when you see pictures of dead children killed by American bombs. Nobody's accusing U.S. soldiers of being "baby killers"; apparently, that is the job of the top brass this time around. But hey, I'm sure that Iraqi marketplace was a military target, and I'm sure that the bomb that hit it came within one yard of hitting its target.
- Marcus-Marcus
8:48:06 AM
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© Copyright 2003 Monster Limo Organization.
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