Random Links

Tuesday, March 11, 2003

An eager mind sinks in the bog of mediocrity.  Bureaucracy consumes all. Yes, Towlie, I do, but I ain't got any :(   6:13:57 PM     comment

Thursday, February 27, 2003

Photo of Japanese "google eye" figurine, attesting to google's ancient (possibly alien) origins. All hail google! I have been visited by google, and life will never be the same.  The joy of seeing tracks left by google in your referrer logs can only be compared to the joy of a mother beholding her babe for the first time.  Then you realize that the search terms by which your site was found were "ominous vader-music" and "madam heather csi." Whatever your personal take, if you're on the web, you live and die by google.  And I ask you, with such a cute name, how could it be bad? Google delivers... Survive a heart attack with google Google will eat your heart for breakfast 7:49:13 PM     comment Top this, Energizer Bunny Every once in a while you read something that makes you realize that our little nationalistic spats aren't that important in the grand scheme of things, and we aren't as superior to our ancestors as we like to believe... http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/2804257.stm 6:54:39 PM     comment

Tuesday, February 25, 2003

Art and headaches This was supposed to be an essay on the nature of art prompted by last weekend's museum visit.  Unfortunately I happen to have a big headache which has turned my brain into mush.  Instead, I leave you with a  photo of a Japanese woodblock print called  "Catching A Demon" by Utagawa Kuniyoshi (1797-1861), which kicks more ass than any writing I could conjure up right now.   To give credit where credit's due, I stole this photo from an ebay auction which you can find here. 9:21:22 PM     comment

Thursday, February 20, 2003

I am probably the only person on earth whose childhood ambition was to become a book critic. Today I would describe myself as just a critic. After all, why should I limit myself when opportunities in the field are nearly limitless? Below is my first forray into TV criticism... CSI Las Vegas: a show written and acted by cyborgs Before I start (and before I receive the cease-and-desist letter), I must describe myself as a fan of the show. I guess I started watching for the same reason people watch reality shows: to have a good laugh at the expense of others. There is nothing better than watching a show really try, and fail miserably at every step. Now I'm hooked, and there is no escape. I even started watching CSI Miami! So why is CSI so bad? After much deliberation, I have come to the inevitable conclusion that the futuristic vision laid out in Terminator has actually come true in the form of a TV show that is written, directed, and produced without the assistance of real humans. As a die-hard fan of the show, I have compiled some tips for the actors and writers of CSI, which, if followed faithfully, should make them appear even more human-like. Pointers for cyborg actors Gil "pompous ass" Grissom": I can't decide which is worse: the jokes or the delivery. Stop stringing me along: going deaf is a great excuse to leave the show. Rick "handsome ex-gambler" Brown: squinting while you say your lines does not make your acting better. Neither does it add credibility to your delivery. Sara "I have no life outside CSI" Sidle: delivering your lines in a droning monotone will not help win friends and influence people. Catherine "I might be the only human on this show!" Willows: Don't blame yourself. It's not your fault that the writers' attempts at exploring your private life fall as flat as a fat woman off a tall building. Nick "a crazy guy actually wanted to steal my life!" Stokes: it's hard to play a scientist when you look like a linebacker... Jim "an actual cop!" Brass. Next time they ask you to drive home one of Grissom's "jokes", just say no. Al "The Coroner" Robbins: You could well be the other human on the show, but the fact that you approach putrefying corpses without a mask belies your fake identity. Greg "the geek" Sanders: The good news is that you're the coolest guy on this show. The bad news is, that's not saying much. Lady "The S&M Madam" Heather: Grissom? What in the world were you thinking? Pointers for cyborg writers: It's OK ignore the fact that real people have private lives outside of work (see the X-Files). It's not OK to blame your bad writing in this department on your characters (those CSIs sure are loners). For more help on this, watch ER do an excellent job of what you fail at again and again. People's bodily fluids are not there for the taking. Note to research team: investigate mysterious "warrant" concept. People who work in the same field don't launch into monologues explaining scientific principles behind their work to their co-workers. Here's an idea: work it into the story. A plot by any other name... Here's some recent setups from the show (to be fair, some of these plots might actually be from CSI: Miami, but who can tell the difference?) a club where people pour honey on one another a club where people paint themselves with day-glo paint a club where people cover themselves with foam an S&M brothel where people wear latex (two appearances so far) Can you see the pattern? Full color, 3D graphics do not appear on computer screens in response to furious typing. Word to research team: mouse. And last and not least: For God's sake, use a smaller sledgehammer to drive your points home! Yes, it is true that cyborg intelligence is far superior to us lowly humans, but some of us do have IQ's above 40. We get it already! - Your biggest fan 1:48:16 PM     comment

Wednesday, February 19, 2003

A quiet day deserves a book plug It's a beautiful day here in New England - the calm after the storm. One of the books I have been reading lately is George Eliot's Middlemarch. I know, I know, George Eliot brings up the inevitable associations with high school, and being forced to read boring books by long-dead authors. Those associations are exactly the reason I've waited this long to read any of her books. I picked up Middlemarch at the bookstore a while ago - when I'm low on cash, I usually pick up a Penguin classic or two - you can't beat the price. Until recently though, it's been knocking around my night-table, not getting any action. Then I picked it up and read the preface (yes, I admit it, I read prefaces), and was pleasantly surprised to find out that far from the bookish school-marm I imagined, George Eliot was actually quite a progressive, and even lived with a man out of wedlock for many years. As far as Middlemarch itself, it is definitely a "novel of manners," but it is also much more than that. Eliot is an excellent writer, and she has a way of elucidating her characters' shortcomings without being condescending. The bottom line: at under $6, Middlemarch is well worth it, and the perfect book to curl up with on a snowy day. 2:40:55 PM     comment

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

Chopin, meet Darth Vader I've been watching a lot of Bergman DVD's lately (that's what a netflix subscription will do to you - don't say I didn't warn you). Sadly, one big reason I've been into these movies is that they involve actual conversation. I rarely go to the movies any more -- there is so much crap out there that it's almost too much trouble to try to find the one rarity that doesn't, let's speak plainly, suck. This weekend I watched Autumn Sonata, which is one of his later (color) films, starring Ingrid Bergman & Liv Ullman as estranged mother & daughter. I thought it was definitely worth seeing, if only for the pleasure of watching the inner workings of a warped relationship. The other thing that aroused my interested was that the Ingrid Bergman character is a concert pianist, and one of the scenes involves the daughter & mother playing Chopin's Prelude No. 2 in A minor. For some reason, the beginning of it reminded me of the ominous-sounding Darth Vader music from Star Wars. Then, of course, I had to dust off my VHS copy of Star Wars and see for myself.  After listening to both I admit the resemblance is not that great, but the mood is definitely similar. What struck me, however, was that although these two movies reside at the opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of genere, theme, or pretty much everything else, they are still both good movies. It is not out of some intellectual snobbery that I reject most of the rubbish that's being served up at movie theaters today.  But for God's sake, when I think of Anakin Skywalker from SW Episode II turning into Darth Vader, I'm sorry, but I just can't make the leap.  The very thought is laughable. Bergman came to a point in his career when he stopped making movies.  Why can't George Lucas do the same? 3:54:56 PM     comment

© Copyright 2003 evans. Last update: 3/22/2003; 2:31:12 PM.

Blog entries by Category

Politics

Culture

Technology

Illusion Awards

Rate my blog

Reading/Watching

Comments by dotcomments