I keep reading all this
discouraging news about teenage pregnancy rates, HIV infections etc.
and was wondering why sex education in the schools seems to be so
ineffective at preventing these problems. To my astonishment, I
discovered that, at least in Canada and the US, they still seem to be
teaching the subject the same way they did forty years ago -- i.e.
incompetently and inefficiently. There is still, I am told, no
discussion of alternative methods of sexual gratification other than
intercourse. In some jurisdictions instructors are equipped to answer
questions about the risk of sexually-transmitted diseases or pregnancy
from these alternative methods, but other than that they aren't part of
the curriculum. In some parts of the US, they aren't even allowed to
answer the questions, because in these 'abstinence only' areas it is
illegal to even mention them. This is absolutely frightening, an
indication of the stranglehold right-wing extremists and ideologically
rigid religious groups have on education in many parts of the
continent. I had heard that Clinton had sacked the first US woman
surgeon-general back in 1994 because she had advocated including
alternatives in sex education, because this had been misinterpreted as
advocacy for actually teaching and demonstrating such alternatives in
schools, but I figured this was just an anomaly, a politically
expedient act to deal with an issue that had been blown out of
proportion. Apparently the opposition to any kind of healthy sex
education information in some parts of the continent is absolute,
unconditional, unrelenting, and politically successful.
Let me put this more plainly:
- Oral sex and masturbation are healthy, lower-risk
alternatives to intercourse. It seems to me obvious that any sex
education program should recognize this, and explain what these
alternatives are and their consequences to young people. Every young person
should be given a pamphlet with more detailed information and FAQs on
these alternatives as well. Those FAQs should not only talk about the
low risks of these alternatives, but also the health benefits and the
social/relationship benefits of learning to do them. I'm not advocating
encouragement or demonstration of these alternatives in the schools,
just providing facts and reassurances. I don't even have a problem with
teachers telling students that some religions consider these practices
sinful. But pretending they don't exist, or that parents somehow are
well suited to provide factual information about these subjects while
teachers are not, or that providing these facts is encouraging
experimentation or promiscuity, is just silly. Worse, it's asking for
trouble, tragedy, unwanted pregnancies, and tacitly encouraging
higher-risk sexual behaviour.
- Information and aids about all forms of healthy sexual
behaviour (excluding only coercive and physically painful or damaging
acts) should be accessible (not forced on, but accessible) to young
people of all ages. The idea that young people would be traumatized by
witnessing sexual activity, or that vibrators and erotica shouldn't be
made available to minors, is simply ludicrous. The challenge, of
course, is to allow young people to explore and discover their own
sexuality on their own terms as their curiosity arises, while at the
same time protecting them from sexual predators, violence, exploitation
and coercion. That's a difficult and important balancing act, but it
can be done, and making more information and aids available to the
young doesn't make it any more difficult, and could actually make it
easier. I was stunned to discover that in Alabama even the sale of
sexual aids to adults is illegal, and that illegality recently survived yet another constitutional court challenge.
- From what I've been told, and what I can find online (the best source, not surprisingly, being the good folks at Planned Parenthood), indicates that no where in school sex education programs are students told that all healthy sexual activity is fun.
This seems to me an absurd, Victorian omission. This is an important
message. It's a fact, not a moral judgement. Not only would this
message make it easier to teach the subject, it would go a long way to
erasing many of the stigmas and guilt feelings that impede healthy
sexual development.
Both Glenn Parton and James Prescott
make compelling arguments that sexual repression, and the social stigma
attached to alternative sexual behaviours not blessed by the religious
orthodoxy, contribute greatly to emotional and psychological illness,
and that this illness, further aggravated by our society's tolerance
for sexual violence, coercion and abuse, is epidemic in our society,
seriously impeding our ability to build healthy relationships and to
live happy, rewarding lives that contribute in positive ways to that
society.
Providing the facts about alternative sexual behaviours, making
information and aids available to young people looking for them, and
telling people that healthy sex is fun. This isn't a difficult or
radical prescription, and it only threatens parents and religious
groups who are afraid of their children learning the truth. So why
aren't we doing it? Geez, it's like the dark ages never ended.
[Oh, yeah, the picture
at top: Nothing to do with the subject, really, just there to grab your
attention. It's from the animated film Final Fantasy, a movie with a
terrible plot, terrible voice-overs, and achingly real drawings and
animation. This movie is the start of something big.]
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MADE IN CANADA
trust your
instincts 
