Much
has been written in the last few years about bonobos, the branch of the
chimpanzee family that remained in the African rainforest when chimps
expanded to less abundant areas and which, to cope with that scarcity,
evolved the more aggressive, male-dominated societies we now commonly
associate with chimps. Although they are facing extinction due to
habitat encroachment and hunting, the bonobos retain the temperament
and social behaviours that have always suited the Eden-like tropical
African wilderness:
- They are peaceful, fun-loving, egalitarian and sensitive
- They live in a matriarchal society, where male aggressiveness is not tolerated by the ruling female 'sisterhood'
- They make limited use of tools, probably because they don't have to use them
- They are almost entirely vegetarian
- They have an active social life in their substantial leisure time
- They
live in large, stable, closed communities of about 100, but social and
sexual behaviour within each community is very loose and casual
Bonobo
females first give birth at around age 14, and thereafter carry and
nurse their young for about five years, rarely becoming pregnant again
until the baby is self-sufficient at age 6 (very much as humans did,
until the invention of agriculture freed mothers from the need to carry
young offspring everywhere with them). Bonobos' average lifespan is
unknown though it is estimated to be 40-60 years. They use hand, voice
and facial gestures extensively for communication, though their voice
is a higher-pitched 'barking' sound than that of the low "ooh, ooh"
sound of the common chimp. Their forest environment has caused them to
evolve a unique primate feature -- opposable 'thumbs' on their feet,
which allow them to use all four limbs to pick up things. Their DNA,
like that of the common chimp, is at least 95% the same as ours.
What
differentiates bonobos most from other primates (other than ourselves)
is the frequency of their sexual activity. Most bonobos engage in a
wide variety of sexual activity (including every variant engaged in by
humans), often several times a day. Sexual activity is quite casual,
engaged with with almost any other member of the community without
commotion, and with each sexual act lasting a very short time. Females
are sexually attractive and active throughout the month and year, and
initiate most sexual activity, both with males and, primarily using
genital-to-genital rubbing, with other females. Face-to-face sex is
common, again a behaviour they share uniquely with human primates.
The obvious question is, why? Research to date,
which is currently very active since the opportunity to study bonobos
in the wild is quickly disappearing, suggests that there are several
reasons, including the use of casual sex as a means to curry favour and
extract food from other community members, but most notably as a means to reduce and avoid conflict and to make up after conflict.
Sex usually occurs before feeding, where the pleasurable, relaxed
feeling it presumably brings encourages more sharing of food in the
afterglow. It usually occurs as well before play, and hence presumably
leads to less aggressiveness and more cooperation and learning during
play. And it usually occurs after (rare) conflicts, apparently to
reconcile the community members and ease bad feelings between the
disputing parties.
When you think of it, it's kind of obvious, in a society that lives in abundance.
In the societies of relative scarcity that common chimps live in,
however, a lot of sex before feeding would exhaust the hunters and
allow the prey time to escape -- not a good idea. But in bonobo society
it makes perfect sense.
What does this suggest about why
humans, the other constantly horny primate, have so much sex for
reasons largely unrelated to procreation? Could it be that we, too, are
so frequently aroused in order to reduce and avoid conflict and to make
up after conflict? Most of us now live in densely packed cities where
poverty and scarcity are endemic, and primatologists have said that if
the aggressive, male-dominated common chimps tried to live in such
conditions the result would be constant warfare and bloodshed that
would make their social order break down completely. So it would make
sense that crowding, and stress, might cause the human body to secrete
more pheromones and other sexual hormones to persuade us we should be
lovers, not fighters -- in other words to behave more like our bonobo
cousins than our common chimp cousins. How many of us will admit to
having had great sex as a reconciliation after a really knock-down,
drag-out fight with our partners? Is it just a coincidence that going
out for dinner is the primary seduction mechanism in human urban
society, that the food-sex connection is so strong?
The
problem occurs when this natural inclination to 'make love not war', to
be casually polyamory creatures within our communities, comes into
conflict with (a) the breakdown of the barriers between tribes and
communities, so that there are simply too many people to have sex with
without life becoming extremely complicated, and (b) the religious and
political taboos against non-monogamous sex.
Why shouldn't the
church and state support us having wild sex with everyone in our
communities, behaving like a bunch of bonobos? After all, they want us
to be placid and obedient, and it's pretty hard to get angry and plot
revolutions with the blissful rush of endorphins running through your
bloodstream all the time. However, the church and state want you to be
locked and isolated in your nuclear family, not comparing notes with
others in your community and loving them more than God and Nation.
Their control over us is threatened by the liberation that a polyamory
lifestyle and a community deeply bonded by love could bring about, so
both church and state have strict laws trying to prevent it. And since
business (in its quest for specialization), immigration and the
automobile have all pretty well broken down the tribal barriers between
communities, it would now be very difficult to reestablish largely
closed, intimate communities to allow this to happen anyway.
So instead of easing the stress of close proximity and scarcity, as nature intended, our rampant sexual desires paradoxically increase
our tension and conflict. Modern human society tolerates sex only
between consenting monogamous partners, converting a polyamory
abundance of sexual freedom and relaxation into yet another
civilizational scarcity. Like all scarcities, that leads to hoarding
(leading in turn to sexual jealousy and psychopathic
over-protectiveness), covetousness and violence (leading to sexual
coercion, abuse, cruel manipulation and even murder), and a black
market in the artificially scarce commodity of sex (leading to
prostitution and sexual exploitation).
All, perhaps, an
ironic, tragic and unpredictable consequence of nature's giving us an
appetite that worked so well for so long for our close siblings, the
now soon-to-be-extinct bonobos. |