Dave Pollard's environmental philosophy, creative works, business papers and essays.
In search of a better way to live and make a living, and a better understanding of how the world really works.

	June 11, 2008

Now What Am I Going to Do? Now what am I going to do? That's a question that millions of people ask themselves every day. In struggling nations the question is about how to get enough to keep the family alive for another day. In the working classes of affluent nations the question is often about how to cope with a layoff, an uninsured or underinsured illness or loss, or costs of living that are soaring. Among those who are educated but unemployed, underemployed, or exhausted by their employment, the question is about finding meaningful work. But in every case the answer is not easy, not obvious, and immensely stressful. A year ago I produced a list of Mid-Year Intentions, and by six months ago I had substantially completed them all. My book had found a publisher. I'd changed jobs to one that promised to let me make a living doing what I'd always wanted to do. I'd made a lot of self-changes for the better, and was healthier, happier, more loving and more productive. I was really on a roll. By intentions I meant more than resolutions...these were things I had already begun and fully intended to finish within six months. This list was my answer to the question Now what am I going to do? At the start of this year I created a second set of New Years' Intentions, to be completed by the end of this month. But despite an incredibly busy and full six months, my success this time around has been much more modest. What went wrong? I intended to: Love as many as people as possible. Live simpler.  Engage in more conversations and practice to become a better conversationalist.  Create community.  Breathe, be present, be still, in those moments when I am alone.  Move more.  Be more self-sufficient.  Be bolder.  Help entrepreneurs more.  Have more fun.  My accomplishments from completing the first six-month intentions list continue to bear fruit, and I'm very proud of them. Sustaining them takes some continuing work, but it's worth it. I'm in the best physical shape I've ever been. The book gets better and better and will soon be in the bookstores. I'm doing more facilitating and less telling, and instead of telling people what to do I tell stories and let them draw their own conclusions. I've become 100% vegetarian and 80% of my meals are now vegan. My health is excellent. So maybe adding another ten intentions was asking too much? This may be partly true -- I constantly feel I'm not getting everything done I should, constantly feel like I'm letting people down, and letting myself down as well. And I'm allowing myself to get sleep-deprived too often. But it's also true that the second list was more ambitious -- more of a stretch, a self-change challenge, including things that I have never been good at. In trying to love as many people as possible, for example,  I've learned that I don't even like most people very much. Thanks to Mia's efforts, not mine, our Second Life Intentional Community is up and running, but I'm impatient with the struggle to find people who share our intention and are willing to invest some energy and time to make it work. And as delightful as the people I've met from real-life Intentional Communities are, I just can't see myself in any of these communities -- it's not what I'm looking for. So I've decided to make my next list of intentions -- my Mid Year Intentions 2008 list, which I'll post in about two weeks -- shorter, perhaps 5 items instead of 10. And beside each broad intention will be One Thing that I will do specifically in the next six months to realize that intention, to get at least measurably closer to achieving it. Each of these 'One Things' will be my answer to the question Now what am I going to do? So preparing the Intention List becomes a three step exercise: What is your intention, in order to become who you really are, and be and do what you were intended to? What's holding you back? What obstacle is blocking you from realizing that intention? What One Thing will you do remove or work around that obstacle? So, for example: I intend to learn to be present, live in the moment, be aware, attentive, appreciative. I am blocked from doing this by my inability to quiet my mind and avoid distractions. The One Thing I will do to remove that obstacle is to study and practice meditation, regularly and diligently. In order to realize my top 5 intentions for the next six months, I'm going to have to be selective, and put my list in order of importance. And I'm going to have to be realistic about how many of those One Things I can expect to do, on top of all that I am already doing. Or else I will have to stop doing some things in order to make room for others, more important. After all, we may only have 37 days to realize our really important intentions. What do you think? Could this simple three-step process help us to let ourselves change, and really realize our intentions? What is your most important intention, to be achieved in the next six months, in order to become more who you really are, and be and do what you were intended to? What's holding you back? And what One Thing will you do to remove or work around that obstacle? Now what are you going to do? Category: Let-Self-Change 9:55:38 PM  trackback []  comment []

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