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Michael Parker's Journal
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Friday, April 30, 2004 |
One of the talking points for dethroning Saddam prior to invading Iraq was the fact that Saddam was a cruel and abusive dictator who was infamous for toruring people. Reports circulated in the media about the infamous Abu Ghraib prison in which enemies to the throne were tortured, intimidated and interograted, and abused.
It is a terribly sick and disgusting irony then that US troops of the 800th Military Police Brigade, under the command of Brig. Gen. Janis Karpinski, are now being charged and I do believe 6 are being scheduled for trials to be court marshalled for their heinous acts. News today mentioned that contract mercenaries are involved and may have been the ones pressuring the troops to do the dirty work.
Consider the details of their crimes, many of them photographed, as reported by James Risen of The New York Times:
...naked Iraq prisoners are stacked in a human pyramid, one with a slur written on his skin in English. In another, a prisoner stands on a box, his head covered, wires attached to his body. The program said that according to the United States Army, he had been told that if he fell off the box, he would be electrocuted. Other photographs show male prisoners positioned to simulate sex with each other.
"The pictures show Americans, men and women, in military uniforms, posing with naked Iraqi prisoners," states a transcript of the program's script, made available Wednesday night. "And in most of the pictures, the Americans are laughing, posing, pointing or giving the camera a thumbs-up."
The CBS News program said the Army also had photographs showing a detainee with wires attached to his genitals and another showing a dog attacking an Iraqi prisoner. The program also reported that the Army's investigation of the case included a statement from an Iraqi detainee who charges that a translator hired to work at the prison raped a male juvenile prisoner.
At the Abu Ghraib prison, where the photographs were taken, American forces have been holding hundreds of Iraqis since the American-led invasion of Iraq.
....dogs had been used to intimidate prisoners.
Today, Bush tried to quell news of this morally bankrupt treatment of Iraqis by condmening the acts and stating that he was, indeed, disgusted by them (per the AP report). "Their treatment does not reflect the nature of the American people," Bush said in the Rose garden at the White House. "That's not the way we do things in America. I didn't like it one bit."
But with the photographs appearing at the beginning of news reports today around the world, especially on Arab television stations, will Bush's statement be enough to incite a devastating backlash. Iraqi's have grown weary of our occupation there, according to the latest polls out this week. If Bush is disgusted, he needs to do more than just talk fluff about how we Americans treat other people. If these contract mercenaries are involved, he needs to bring them to justice, even though reports today explain that they are not subject to the law.
In the Joel Schumaker's film Tigerland, the character Boz, (played by Colin Ferrell) is trying to survive boot camp. In one scene, Boz and his fellow trainees are being trained on how to interrogate a "gook." Boz gets up and walks away when the officer begins explaining how you can electrocute "gooks" by placing the positive and negative charges on their balls. The officer runs after Boz and aggressively confronts Boz about running out. Boz cries out in reply "Why would you want to do that to another human being?"
Bush's reaction today tried to paint Americans as human beings. This incident, however, paints a completly different story.
10:04:53 PM  | |
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Thursday, April 29, 2004 |
Over the past week, the GOP attack dogs have been belittling Kerry's miliary service and the fact that he threw his medals. Before I go any further, let me just say this-- at least Kerry had medals to throw. There's much more experience and leadership represented in those symbols of patriotism and honor than a mere report that proves you kept an annual dentist appointment. Don't you think?
Dick Cheney at Westminister College attacked Kerry's service in a speech. That backfired. I heard the university invited Kerry to speak to the student body so that Kerry can set the record straight. Sen. Lautenberg came out in defense of Kerry, attacking Cheney for being a chickenhawk.
In a scathing speech on the Senate floor, Lautenberg, D-New Jersey, said that he did not think politicians should be judged by whether they had military service but added that "when those who didn't serve attack the heroism of those who did, I find it particularly offensive."
Lautenberg pointed to a poster with a drawing of a chicken in a military uniform defining a chickenhawk as "a person enthusiastic about war, provided someone else fights it."
"They shriek like a hawk, but they have the backbone of the chicken," he said.
"The lead chickenhawk against Sen. Kerry [is] the vice president of the United States, Vice President Cheney," Lautenberg said. "He was in Missouri this week claiming that Sen. Kerry was not up to the job of protecting this nation. What nerve. Where was Dick Cheney when that war was going on?"
Lautenberg chastised members of the Bush administration for being overly eager to go to war when they had not been willing to fight themselves. He quoted a Cheney interview from the 1980s that he had "other priorities" in the '60s than military service.
Kerry's website has some key questions about Bush's record that the media should be requesting from Bush. They are as follows:
Bush Has Said He Used No Special Treatment To Get Into The Guard. How Does He Explain The Fact That He Jumped Ahead Of 150 Applicants Despite Low Pilot Aptitude Scores?
Col. Albert Lloyd Said A Report >From Alabama To Ellington Should Have Been Filed. Where Is That Report?
Why Did Bush Miss His Medical Exam In 1972?
Where Are The Complete Results Of The Required Investigation Into Bush’’s Absence From The Exam?
Why Did Bush Specifically Request To NOT Be Sent Overseas For Duty?
Why Does The White House Say Bush Was On Base When Bush’’s Superiors Had Filed A Report Saying He Was Gone For A Whole Year?
Why Is The Pentagon Under Orders To Not Discuss Bush’’s Record With Reporters?
Where Are Bush’’s Flight Logs?
Why Hasn’’t Bush Himself Demonstrated That He Showed Up For Service in Alabama?
Maybe the GOP are attacking Kerry on this now so that it isn't a major talking point during the debates or around election time. Whatever the reason, it isn't wise of them, in my opinion, to ridicule Kerry for service that Bush and Cheney weasled their way out of one way or another.
Related Articles of Interest
Berger Offers Advice for a Democratic President, by Samuel Berger, top Clinton-era National Security Council. One of the highlights of this article consisted of this statement: "The administration's high-handed style and its gratuitous unilateralism have embittered even those most likely to embrace American values and invited opposition even from those with most to gain from American successes....Although the United States has never enjoyed greater power than it does today, it has rarely possessed so little influence. We can compel, but far too often we cannot persuade."
Why Kerry Threw His Ribbons, by Douglas Brinkley. Brinkley describes his interview with Kerry from December of 2002. It is a fitting article that explains the war hero Kerry even as he finds himself amidst attacks on his military service in Vietnam, especially the attack that his first Purple Heart was undeserved, which led to Kerry releasing his military records. The opening paragraph makes one realize just how superficial Bush's experience was in comparison. No contest, fellas. Great article.
Speak the Truth, by David Corn, the Washington Editor for The Nation. In this article, Corn spells out the direction he feels Kerry should be moving his campaign. It's hard to read because it dishes out the reality that the campaign is lacking in vision. I appreciate Corn's advice:
Kerry should get in touch with his inner angry-but-hopeful-young-man. (Whoops, that could be construed as advice for the candidate.) Not that he should be denouncing The Man and raging against the machine. But if he cannot offer a clear alternative to Bush’’s Iraq mess, he has to find other ways to demonstrate strength, judgment and conviction. Sure, that’’s tough to do when the Bush campaign is dropping a piano on you everyday. It’’s also hard to do when you are busy repositioning yourself per your consultant’’s recommendations. The incessant harking back to Vietnam war-hero glory (and gory) days will only get Kerry so far. It is as important-if not more so-for Kerry to display a modern-day version of the passion, idealism and sense of commitment that defined his opposition to the war. John Kerry once spoke from his gut (without the help of Bob Shrum and other consultants). He connected. He must do so again.
Don't Stay the Course Senator, by Robert Scheer. Scheer also explains what is ailing the Kerry campaign and gives advice similar to Corn on getting back on track--Kerry needs to become more like that former war hero and protester and confront Bush's war policy.
8:43:14 PM | |
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Tuesday, April 27, 2004 |
In December, I listed Disney's Brother Bear in my top ten family films of 2003. Over the weekend, I sat down with my dad in front of his exceptionally splendid new home theater and watched the commentary for the film. And let me tell you what, girls and boys, the commentary stands on its own as purely delightful comedy. Whoever came up with the idea should be given a raise. If you have seen the film, you know that the two moose that walk in and out of the story line, acting as the film's comic relief, are played by the dopey yet hilarious Canadian drinking boys Rick Moranis & Dave Thomas, best known as Doug & Bill Mackenzie and the cult classic film Strange Brew.
The commentary is literally the two moose talking throughout the entirety of the movie. The topics they discuss cross a broad spectrum--from how well they were treated on the set in comparison with some of the other actors (such as the salmon), to which one of them is the better actor, and even to how they liked working with Coda the baby bear because he made it so they didn't have to work long hours (or night hours) because he was a child who needed sleep and so many hours at school.
In the first third of the film, they order grass pizza and try to convince the pizza boy that they get the pizza free because he took to long to deliver it. They talk about how over-population is killing nature. They discuss some of techniques of creating the animated feature. And they continually talk about being hungry and how the other one is stupid and dopey looking. In all, this commentary is like the genius behind Strange Brew reincarnated as a moose film and it is definitely worth your time, especially if you like the antics of the Mackenzie's. Enjoy, eh?
Warning: Don't watch this film expecting to hear the soundtrack of Brother Bear because you won't hear it. My two kids kept asking me when they were going to stop talking so they could hear the movie. In all, young kids are going to grow increasingly frustrated as the film progresses.
10:11:40 PM | |
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Monday, April 26, 2004 |
20,000 US soldiers serving in Iraq just had their duty extended just over 10 days ago. My friend's unit, the 194th Transportation Company, is one of the many units who learned of their extension as they were backing up and preparing to board a plane home. This will be their second extension.
You hear stories from the soldiers of low morale. These guys feel like foster kids being moved here and there, no one paying attention to them or caring about their welfare. I wrote a letter to the Senator's and Congressmen of Utah to see if they can get this unit home. I wanted to share the content of my letter because their story needs to be told. I hope you will understand this.
Dear Senators and Congressmen,
You probably have heard that the 419th Transportation Company has been extended duty for its second time. My friend currently serves in this division.
In a meeting last Sunday, officials from the Army came to listen to the concerns from this unit’s families and loved ones. As you can imagine, there were more tears than questions. I heard about a father who stood and cried about the possibility of losing his only son. My friend’s wife explained to me that a mother with two young children told her that her four year old asked her why daddy won’t be coming home. "Doesn’t he like us anymore?" the little girl said.
I also heard about one of the soldiers of the 419th whose upcoming wedding and honeymoon (in which he already had plane tickets, hotel reservations, etc. for) will have to be canceled. There are many other stories similar to this one in which family and extended family vacations have been planned and paid for in commemoration of these soldier’s homecomings and reunions after serving loyally for their country. These plans and reunions also will have to be cancelled.
For the families, this extension is a traumatic one because they thought that this would be the end of their personal battles. They had finally started letting go of the fear that has haunted them that they might never see their father, husband, fiancé, brother, or son return alive, daily worrying and praying and wondering if fate would be on their side. To be so close, only to have it taken away from you, has torn many hearts and souls. Some are used to it, they say this has happened to them before. Many feel short shrifted by the Army.
The extensions of the 1457th and the 419th units have deeply affected people in Utah. I’m sure you heard last Monday about the death of Chad Thompson, 32, a Utah National Guardsmen for 10 years who worked as the full-time supply staff sergeant (Salt Lake Tribune, Monday, April 19, 2004). Angered that his brother’s unit had been extended, especially since the Pentagon pledged that their tour of duty would not be more than 12 months, Thompson attempted to alleviate his sorrows drinking with friends Sunday night. After, however, he ended up arguing with his wife over the phone.
Thompson drove to her house where, it was reported, he threatened the mother-in-law (who was staying at the house) with a loaded gun. The mother-in-law called the police but before the police arrived, Thompson had fled.
The police found Thompson hiding behind one of the neighbor’s homes. They released a K 9 unit on him, which angered him more. Amidst cries to the cops to call off their dog, Thompson made threats that he’d shoot the police, even stating that his finger was on the trigger. One of the officers fired, hitting Thompson in the head. This scene was witnessed by the owner of the home, Patrice Rikli, who had happened to let her dog out into the backyard and Tina Morton, a neighbor who had been awakened by the commotion and saw what transpired from her second story bedroom window.
Two days after this incident, the 1457th received word that they are going home.
In this meeting with the Army last Sunday, the families were told that the uprisings in Iraq were the reason for the extension; they weren’t expecting the uprising. They also said that in order to replace the 419th, it would take 90 to 120 days to train the replacement division.
Personally, I find this reason disingenuous. Bush, Rumsfield, and many generals have stated that troops could be in Iraq well into 2005 or later. And this past week, the Washington Post published a report stating that Bush set aside $402 billion dollars for the Defense budget for 2005 to assist in sustaining the 100,000 troops that will stay in Iraq as a security/police force (LA Times).
Based on this information, the Army should have been training another unit when the 419th was serving their first extension. Either the Army is lying to these families or this is just another example of how poorly planned this invasion, reconstruction, and exit strategy is from the top of the executive branch to the Pentagon and the Defense Department to the Army. Nevertheless, someone or some people have been highly negligent toward the troops. In this case, to the highly patriotic 419th.
I have been told that there is no Army base in Utah and the troops of the 419th and their families wonder if this unit is continually extended because they are misrepresented or plainly have no representation. I implore you to be this representation they need. Go to bat for them. And please, don’t strike out. Honor their loyal service by bringing them home.
Sincerely,
Michael Parker
6:13:12 PM | |
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Thursday, April 22, 2004 |
Directed by : Michael Polish
Written by: Michael and Mark Polish
Starring: James Woods (Walter O'Brien), Nick Nolte (Father Harlan), Douglas Sebern (Mayor), Claire Forlani (Mrs. Hadfield), Duel Farnes (Irwin), Mark Polish (Willis O'Brien), Daryl Hannah (Flower Hercules), Graham Beckel (Marvin), Josh Barker (Matt, as Joshuin Barker), Peter Coyote (Eddie), Jon Gries (Arnold), Rick Overton (Rudolph), Robin Sachs (Cup of Tea), Ben Foster (Cod), Anthony Edwards (Happy)
Original Music: Stuart Matthewman
Cinematography: M. David Mullen
Northfork is a film about a small Montana town in the 1950's. The government has just completed a new dam, which, when filled, will submerge the town and the countryside surrounding it. As the final hours tick away before the dam starts holding back water, residents of the town and farmlands surrounding it continue to file out, personal belongings tied down to the roofs and sides of their pickup trucks and cars. The exodus echoes of the depression-stricken residents leaving Oklahoma in The Grapes of Wrath. Walter O’Brien (James Woods) and his eldest son Willis (Mark Polish), along with three other father and sons pairs, have been hired by the government to help relocate 64 residents that are refusing to leave. Each father and son pair is assigned to be the caretaker of 16 families. If these men, (who were fashioned to look and act like salesmen and Mormon missionaries), get all 16 to leave, they are given a large parcel of land on higher ground. As they go about their jobs, we sense their animosity toward the government for their dam project and how it has caused the death of a community. It has uprooted families who had lived there their whole lives; it was splitting up lifelong friendships; most disturbing was the fact that many were forced to dig up the graves of their loved ones and move them elsewhere. The O’Briens were faced with this very unsettling task. Their story is mildly comical amidst unique encounters, one that includes visiting a man who has built an ark and who has two wives.
The companion story is about a young orphan boy by the name of Irwin. Irwin is dying. We first see him lying in the back seat of a car; he is sickly. The couple that has adopted are in the act of returning him to the orphanage. Irwin is too sick, they say to Father Harlan (Nick Nolte), there’s no way we can give him the care that he needs or requires.
Father Harlan takes him in and cares for him until Irwin passes on.
While Irwin is conscious, Father Harlan reads him comic books and the scriptures; he’s given him scientific glasses comprised of additional instruments such as magnifying lenses; he’s given him a toy metal airplane. Irwin’s dream is to fly.
Father Harlan also likes to tell Irwin that he is an angel, even showing Irwin white feathers that he has found growing behind Irwin’s ears. We know Irwin believes Father Harlan because when a couple come by to meet Irwin, to see if they want to adopt him, Irwin reminds Father Harlan as he is on his way to the parking lot to meet them "Tell them that I am an angel."
Irwin’s waking life is reflected in his unconsciousness, as he dreams that he finds a group of angels (played by Daryl Hannah, Robin Sachs, Ben Foster, and Anthony Edwards) who are looking for a lost angel. Irwin tries to convince them in numerous visits that he is the angel they are looking for. These scenes are intriguing and heartwarming. It is the foundation for a climactic scene in which Irwin dies.
Northfork indeed is an amazing film. The cinematography, even though simple, is a visual artistic achievement. I thought of the black and white photography of Ansel Adams while watching this film. If art is worth a thousand words, then these thousand words are arranged like poetry.
The script (written by Michael and Mark Polish), too, is amazingly unique. Irwin’s story is one of the most beautiful and memorable ones written for film. It lends insight into the minds of people who are dying and it reveals it in such an expansive, visionary way. It’s hard not to be touched or deeply affected by it, not to forget the equally intriguing story of the O’Briens that weaves throughout.
Northfork is like good literature; it’s sacred, like a lost testament of scripture about salvation, death, and life in Depression-era Western America.
Consider these closing lines from the finale. Father Harlan’s voice is heard as we see the emptied and cold landscapes of Northfork. He explains:
And in that journey of dying, you see many things. But all of the issues I had are past, because I was to be a witness, a helper. And that is the thing I think is important about death, is the ability for us to be witnesses, not only for a person coming in, but of going out. And that is what we have here–we’ve lost our time, it’s gone. But maybe there is a birth someplace else. Maybe there is a blessing from that experience. I’m no longer afraid of death; but it’s a lesson that has taken me sixty years to learn.
It was a pleasure to be a witness of this film. Northfork is one of the best films of 2003.
11:18:35 PM | |
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Wednesday, April 21, 2004 |
The New York Times printed a extraordinary article by Karen Spears Zacharias about having to live nearly her entire life without her father, who died serving in Vietnam. Karen was nine when he died.
Her voice is one of many who are coming out these days questioning our role in the Iraq war. Her article, The Lost Father, is a needed perspective, especially in light of the 20,000 + troops whose duty has just been extended another three months; and in light of the suggestion on the floor of Congress to institute a draft.
Here are a few paragraphs, but you should really read it in its entirety:
As the daughter of a soldier killed in action, I'm worried sick about this generation of war-torn families. I read the growing casualty list from Iraq and think about the number of children who are being left fatherless — or motherless. I consider the fourth grader who stands alone at recess trying to recall her father's voice; the weeping bride who walks the aisle alone, wishing with every step that her father was there to escort her; and all those babies not yet born, their memories not yet formed.
I keep a photo of my father on my desk. In it, he's wearing combat boots, Army greens and a grin so sweet it makes my heart drip with sorrow.
[snip]
It didn't matter to Daddy what we were doing, as long as we were together, having fun. It's as if, somehow, he knew those moments wouldn't last.
I can remember what my father smelled like — sweat and sun-dried T-shirts — but I can no longer recall the timbre of his voice or the warmth of his embrace. Photos and memories are all I have left of him.
He went away in December 1965. [snip]
Only nine at the time, I didn't know that South Vietnam was half a world away and I sure to heck didn't know what communism was. I didn't even understand that my father would be in any danger. I cried simply because he was going away and I was afraid he would never come back. "I'll come back, I promise," Daddy said, wiping my tears as he sat on the edge of my bed.
Daddy kept his promise. He did come back: in a silver coffin, draped with a red-white-and-blue flag.
My mother still has the flag, folded and tucked neatly into a small wooden box, along with the half-dozen shiny golden medals awarded my dead father. His name — David P. Spears — is etched in black granite on Panel 9E at the Vietnam Veterans Memorial in Washington.
The sacrifices didn't stop when the war ended. My mother sold the moped and tossed out the fishing poles. She gave away all Daddy's T-shirts and his Army boots. At 14, my brother, Frankie, burned Daddy's footlocker and all its contents. "Mama told me to," Frankie said. "Everything in it was covered in blood."
[snip]
I'm troubled by the nightmares that surely await this generation of battle-scarred children. I know they will grow up longing for just one more embrace. And like me, they are doomed to spend their lifetimes asking, wasn't there any better way?
6:02:15 PM | |
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Tuesday, April 20, 2004 |
Cate Blanchett is one of the most talented actresses in film today. I thought she was marvelous in the film Charlotte Gray too. I've added it to my film database. In reviewing my review, I realized once again how prescient the closing statement is. Spoken by Michael Gambon, he says: "My shame is living long enough to see my country betray itself." I thought of our current situation in Iraq, how Bush and his administration created a lie in order to get us to agree to his war. In some respects, his words find meaning in our time.
CHARLOTTE GRAY is a World War II film about a British woman whose lover has been shot down over France. She joins the British Corp. as a spy so she can go to France to attempt to find him. While in the free zone of France, she works for a group of Communists who are helping the Resistance against the Germans.
Cate Blanchet, the Best Actress nominee for her portrayal of Queen Elizabeth in the film ELIZABETH, plays Charlotte Gray.
One of the most memorable sub-stories in this film occurs when the French police have started arresting Jews. Two Jewish boys are left abandoned one night while they were out playing in the hay fields. They returned to the house only to find it empty.
The leader of the Communist group, who is working with Charlotte Gray, discovers the boys wandering the streets of the village and boards them with his father in the countryside. He also encourages Charlotte to be the housekeeper so that she can care for the boys and so no one will suspect her as being a spy. As she cares for the boys, she realizes that they are unaware of their parents fate; they feel that their parents abandoned them because they did not love them.
Through a series of unfortunate events, the boys are discovered and placed on a train to a Polish concentration camp. Before the train is to leave, Charlotte types out a letter and runs it to the station. She finds the car the boys are in and slips them the letter. When the letter is read, we realize that Charlotte has written to the boys as if she were their mother. She explains that they are in Paris doing work for the war, that all is well, and that they will be together again when the war is over. She ends the letter revealing a great love for them.
After the letter is read, we see the boys touch the letter. One feels the edges of the paper while the other feels the indentations of the words caused by the typewriter.
The film succeeds in impressively recreating the details of a World War II London and French countryside. The acting, also, made up for a script that lacked complexity, maybe because it focused on a love-triangle that seemed to end too conveniently. But on a whole, there were meaningful moments in the film I'll not easily forget. I already mentioned one above. I also found a line worthy of recognition. Consider this:
During a nightly conversation between an elderly man (who had fought during World War I and received France's highest honor) and Charlotte, the man (Michael Gambon) says a most poignant line: "My shame is living long enough to see my country betray itself."
8:17:37 PM | |
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Monday, April 19, 2004 |
The next couple of days, I am attempting to post the reviews of some of my favorite war films. Tonight I'm starting with Colin Ferrill's first film (I think), Tigerland, released in 2000.
Joel Schumacher's Tigerland is a story of two young men who meet and become pals while trying to survive boot camp and Tigerland, a preparatory state prior to being sent to the Vietnam war. I loved it! One of the best films of last year! The script, written by Michael McGruther, is disturbingly honest, unflinchingly realistic, and poignantly sincere. Colin Ferrill, who plays the lead actor Boz, is remarkable--it helps that his personality is a mix of mysticism and pro-individuality.
A friend of mine who served in Vietnam once explained to me about that war that laws and rules and goodness (values, morals, and ethics) don't matter to the soldier because the soldier has been trained in such a way that he is paranoid, not able to discern who is on your side, who you can trust, etc. This film capitalizes on this theory, even going as far as to show that self-serving men (trained in the tactics displayed in the film) become dangerous, even monsters toward their own men. (I'm referring to the character named Wilson.)
Tigerland is as riveting as one of my other favorite war films, The Thin Red Line.
Boz is the humanity admidst the inhumanity at Tigerland. He's the realist who is confident that goodness cannot be sacrificed, even at war. Boz attempts to retain this characteristic while at Tigerland. The only problem is, as is too well depicted in the film, that one must suffer the verbal and physical punishments of the Army (any establishment, really) for not towing the line and playing along with their game of making killing machines for their country. Boz, when being trained on how to interrogate a "gook," walks away from the commanding officer as the officer is saying that they can even electrocute "gooks" by placing the positive and negative charges on their balls. The officer goes after Boz. When confronted, Boz replies "Why would you want to do that to another human being?"
When it comes to our establishments that govern and direct us, this question seems rarely asked. And this point alone makes this film an important one to watch.
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Have you ever read something and mocked it for its simpleness, only to return to it later after realizing how significant it is? That has just happened to me.
Each month, the calendar that hangs in our kitchen offers a different quote. The quote for the month of April is from a man I have never heard of, Bruce Barton. It reads: "The most important thing about getting somewhere is starting right where we are."
When I first read it, I thought how silly, how simpleton. No duh! But my perspective of this quote changed after reading Real Live Preacher’s post on his current struggle with depression. Knowing how cognizant and caring he is of the worshipers in his congregation and of his fellow bloggers, this saddened me.
I reflected on my own struggles, not just from depression but also from operations, illness, the death of loved ones, and experiences that have tested my sense of self-worth.
We really are fragile creatures at the heart of us. Life is a landscape of valleys and mountains, smooth times and trying times. Sometimes, we fall of the path and land in a dark, ugly pit. For me, sitting in that dark pit, I become so despondent that I slowly shut down and become dysfunctional. I forget about everything and everyone except myself and my problems.
I’ve realized the key to overcoming this and crawling out of the pit is first and foremost to realize where I am. Only then can I plot how to climb out of the pit.
I’ve learned through my own ups and downs that there are many new beginnings, grand opportunities to refocus yourself toward a better life or a better horizon. I don’t use the word "failure" because of that adage that "if at first you don’t succeed, try and try again."
Consider this experience: When I was twenty-six years old, lumbars 4 and 5 in my lower back herniated. I couldn’t stand straight. I was shorter than my wife. I was in so much pain that I was on constant pain medication. Mentally, I felt like a freak. I hated going out in public. I felt old and robbed of youth.
Going into the operating room, the doctor told me that depending on the extent of the damage, there might not be a chance that I would be able to walk. I prepared myself for that possible fate. But the operation was successful.
Two mornings later, I awoke early and was watching television. I came upon a channel that was airing excerpts of the Pioneer Day Marathon in Salt Lake City, Utah. I recall watching the front runner, who went on to win the race. The reporter talked about how this runner was too ill the previous year to run any race. He decided that he would not let this setback ruin his love for running. He chose to eat better, train better, and live better. Lying in the hospital bed, I was a witness of his success.
That very morning I told myself out loud that I was going to run the Pioneer Day 10k the next year. I started that very day plotting a strategy to prepare for that race. Preparing for the race, at first was literally taking baby steps toward that goal. After two weeks, however, I had worked myself up to walking four miles in one walk. After six months, I was running 2 miles. One year later, I ran that 10k in a time of 46 minutes. Thirteen months after the operation, I ran my first marathon in a decent time of 4 hours and 19 minutes.
I have had to start over many other times. I have to battle the effects of rheumatoid arthritis and am currently controlling it by applying this same method–when I get an attack, I have to pick myself back up, start from where I am, and move on.
I like to read Tamar Ricardo, the astrologist over at Kabbalah.com. He had the most fascinating advice at the end of last month in regards to starting over and letting go of your burdens. It was right in line for the starting of Passover. These are the days, he explained, that we can prepare to pick ourselves up and get ourselves out of our personal Egypt.
I can’t sum up my sentiments any better than that.
4:18:30 PM | |
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Sunday, April 18, 2004 |
After five years, this movie still haunts me. I've just added my review to my film database. I'm including the first few paragraphs below for your enjoyment. I hope you take some time to read the whole thing.
Frank (Nicolas Cage) is a paramedic for Our Lady of Misery Hospital in Hell's Kitchen, New York City. He works the late shift, the hours between eleven and seven in the morning. His inner-city route is challenging, encompassing the ghetto and low-income districts, which has its lion-share of drunks, loonies, street dwellers, whores, drag queens, and drug dens. But he wouldn't work anywhere else. This is the place he knows. This is the neighborhood he grew up in. And this is the place where he administers to the bodies and spirits of those in need. "These spirits were part of the job. It was impossible to pass a building that didn't hold a ghost. Eyes of a corpse; the screams of a loved one."
Frank used to love his job, serving the poor and needy and saving lives. "Saving someones life," he said, "is like falling in love. The best drug in the world. For days, sometimes weeks afterwords, you walk the street making infinite whatever you see. For a few weeks, I couldn't feel the earth. Everything I touched became lighter. Horns played from my shoes. Petals fell from my pockets. You wonder if you've become immortal, as if you've saved your own life as well. God has passed for you. And for a moment, God was you."
But something has changed for him and he has been unable to save anyone for six months. Because of this, he hasn't been able to sleep or eat. He's seeing the ghosts of those he has not been able to save. He has lost hope in his ability (or power) to save, though he commits at each new call that this patient will survive.
This is Frank's perspective when we meet him, when he gets the call to an apartment to revive a man who has suffered a cardiac arrest. Getting into the apartment, he finds the family hysterical, pleading him to bring their dad back to life. So he starts working on him, Mr. Burke. But Frank is troubled by the situation. Does he save him for the family? Does he save him to crawl out of his six-month slump? What about Mr. Burke. Does he even want to come back?
While jump-starting the heart, Frank said: "In the past, I came to believe in spirits leaving the body and not wanting to be put back, spirits angry at the awkward places death had left them. I understood how crazy it was to think this way. But I was convinced that I could turn around and see old man Burke standing, watching, waiting for us to finish."
In the next three days after reviving Mr. Burke, Frank mulls over these questions while dealing with his sense of hoplessness, guilt, and the ghost of Rosie, a young woman who died in his arms six months ago. Her face has begun appearing on every woman he'd see. Her voice would be the voice he'd hear. "I used to block it out." he said. "I used to forget. But she wouldn't let go. And now she's come to bear witness for all of them, for all who had been lost."
Read the review in its entirety here.
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Saturday, April 17, 2004 |
Added my review of this great film, Being John Malcovich, to my film database. I hope you choose to check it out sometime.
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More house cleaning today. I've added some blogs to my favorite's list--Rayne Today, Real Live Preacher, The Barbaric Yawp, Tbogg, and Matt Yglesias. I've been meaning to add these for weeks and have never gotten around to doing it.
I haven't been happy with how my Stories template has looked. I do believe I've fixed that.
Housecleaing, I've discovered, is never really finished. Now back to blogging.
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Friday, April 16, 2004 |
The general news sources have not mentioned this in the US, which is a travesty. This was printed in The Australian on April 14th. This is absolutely shameful.
AN Iraqi has died of his wounds after US troops beat him with truncheons because he refused to remove a picture of wanted Shiite Muslim leader Moqtada Sadr from his car, police said today.
The motorist was stopped late yesterday by US troops conducting search operations on a street in the centre of the central city of Kut, Lieutenant Mohamad Abdel Abbas said.
After the man refused to remove Sadr's picture from his car, the soldiers forced him out of the vehicle and started beating him with truncheons, he said.
US troops also detained from the same area five men wearing black pants and shirts, the usual attire of Sadr's Mehdi Army militiamen and followers.
Qassem Hassan, the director of Kut general hospital, identified the man as Salem Hassan, a resident of a Kut suburb.
He said the man had died of wounds sustained in the beating.
A spokesman for the US-led coalition could not confirm the incident.
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Thursday, April 15, 2004 |
Added the review for the Don Bluth animated, space adventure film Titan AE to the Film page.
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I finally got hold of a ZIP drive to access some of my older movie reviews. So I will be adding more of them to my Film page. I have just added Ridley Scott's award-winning film, Gladiator. I hope you have the time to check it out.
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Wednesday, April 14, 2004 |
Atrios linked to William Saletan's article Trust, Don't Verify in Slate today. It's an excellent analysis of Bush's speech and Q&A last night. I found Saletan's closing remarks especially keen, as he attempted to define Bush as we have come to know him the past four years:
To many Americans, the gap between Bush's statements about the months before 9/11, on the one hand, and the emerging evidence about those months, on the other, raises doubts about the credibility of their government. To other nations, the gap between Bush's statements about Iraqi weapons, on the one hand, and the emerging evidence about those weapons, on the other, has become the central reason to distrust the United States in other matters of enormous consequence, such as North Korea's nuclear program.
To all of this, however, Bush is blind. He doesn't measure his version of the world against anybody else's. He measures his version against itself. He says the same thing today that he said yesterday. That's why, when he was asked Tuesday whether he felt any responsibility for failing to stop the 9/11 plot, he kept shrugging that "the country"—not the president—wasn't on the lookout. It's also why, when he was asked to name his biggest mistake since 9/11, he insisted, "Even knowing what I know today about the stockpiles of weapons [not found in Iraq], I still would've called upon the world to deal with Saddam Hussein." Bush believes now what he believed then. Incredible, but true.
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Tuesday, April 13, 2004 |
I'm going to have to link to this guy. I like his style! Consider an excerpt from his post "Keystone Kounter Terrorism" from The Daily Outrage:
Only George W. Bush could study a memo titled "Bin Laden Determined To Strike in US", and then blithely assert that it "said nothing about an attack on America."
Note to the President: "US" is a common abbreviation for "the United States of America", the country we live in and of which you are the highest elected official, a country also often referred to in shorthand as "America." Good luck with that whole national security thing from hereon out.
The "Bin Laden Determined to Strike" memo, reluctantly released this weekend, was first presented as an intelligence briefing for the President on Aug. 6, 2001 -- while he was in Texas enjoying a near-record-setting month-long siesta. Ever since -- and outrageously, even to the present day, when the actual document is out there contradicting them -- Bush and Condoleeza Rice have slyly characterized it as a brief history lesson about al-Qaida, when it is actually a reasonably specific warning.
"There was nothing in there that said, you know, 'There is an imminent attack'," Bush insisted again as late as today. "That wasn't what the report said. The report was kind of a history of Osama's intentions."
Horsefeathers. You can read the whole memo here and judge yourself. It says, among other things, that "al-Qaida members -- including some who are US citizens -- have resided in or traveled to the US for years, and the group apparently maintains a support structure that could aid attacks"; that "FBI information ... indicates patterns of suspicious activity in this country consistent with preparations for hijackings or other types of attacks"; that this suspicious activity includes "recent surveillance of federal buildings in New York;" that the FBI is conducting 70 full field investigations across the country that are "bin-Laden related"; and that an anonymous tip in May 2001 warned "that a group of Bin Laden supporters was in the US planning attacks."
In fact, this "Bin Laden to Strike" memo is a truly damning piece of evidence. If the President and his team had acted appropriately on it -- by which I mean, if he'd simply ordered his top people to get together to discuss how serious it was -- 9/11 might well have been prevented.
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Upon returning home from vacation in Denver (thanks J and R for the extraordinary weekend–the Nuggets rocked da’ house BIG TIME!), I scanned over a few of the hits the blog received yesterday. One of them was an AskJeeves search. The question of the search was "What is Michael Parker’s problem?"
Granted, there are many Michael Parker’s out in the world and logically it might not even be in reference to me. Nonetheless, I was impacted by this question.
I never considered that I write because I have a problem with the world, an axe to grind. Nonetheless, I can see how someone might feel I have a problem. I do feel passionately about politics and end up writing about that more than anything else. (I’d much rather write about film; that’s where my heart lies.)
I realize that some of my topics are on the edge, seemingly more fit for a conspiracy theorist. That’s due to the movie buff sitting in the creative side of my brain saying: "Damn, that story makes for a great script!" (By the way, did you hear that the writers and producers of the Watergate film All The President’s Men is going to produce the film version of Richard Clarke’s Against All Enemies? Can't wait!)
Most assuredly though, I realize that I attack the legitimacy of anything this presidency says it has accomplished. I didn’t like the way this administration took office (on the back of a conservative Supreme Court); I didn’t like the way they quickly began separating themselves from global participation and responsibility; I didn’t like the way our surplus was squandered, which created a debt that has America’s economy and it’s citizens financial outlook hanging off a cliff above another great Depression. And I have not liked how they have used 9/11 to legitimize their agenda and wage war on Iraq.
They’ve hit the world like an earthquake of a seven-point-plus magnitude. The repercussions of this presidency could likely take decades to resolve.
So there you have it–Michael Parker’s problem.
Shouldn’t this be every American’s problem too?
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Thursday, April 08, 2004 |
I won't be posting anything till Monday because I will be out of town. Happy belated Passover and Happy Easter.
If you want something to read, I suggest going over to Terminus (see link on left in Favorite Blogs). The blog's author, Drew Vogel, has been finishing up reviewing all of Stanley Kubrick's films. You will enjoy his reviews, as I have. I recommend him wholeheartedly! Who knows, you may find yourself running to the video store to rent one for the weekend.
Best of wishes to you all.
11:23:56 PM | |
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At the gym I frequent, they have twelve tv sets hanging from the ceiling so that people doing cardio have a variety of things to watch. I station myself so that I can watch the video music channel and one or two news stations (it's always Fox News and/or CNN). Tonight, however, MSNBC was being played on the tv next to the video music. Luckily, I caught the Chris Matthew's Harball show in which the 9 11 Widows attended and discussed Condi Rice's commission hearing. While I read the closed captions being displayed for Hardball, I was listening to the music from the gym's video music channel.
As Matthew's showed tidbits from Rice's testimony, I was being entertained by Lil Kim's sensuously delicious hip-hop song "How many licks does it take to get to the center of an "O"?"
If you are Condi Rice and this administration, I surmised with a smile, it's not a matter of how many licks it takes before they have the greatest "O" of their life, it's how many missiles they can drop. (Remember how excited they got over their Shock and Awe method of warfare?) I know this sounds crude, but doesn't it seem that Bush and his groupies get off on nothing else but the talk of war and terror attacks?
Anyway, moving on, I was so impressed with Matthews, the 9 11 Widows, and the three panel guests that followed them. The 9 11 Widows especially made an impact in the commentary of today's hearing. If you are not familiar with these ladies, they are Krsiten Breitweiser, Patty Casazza, Lorie Van Auken, and Mindy Kleinberg. They all lost their husbands in the attacks on the World Trade Center and have been the driving force behing the creation of the 9/11 Commission.
Click here to see all notes of their MSNBC appearance. I'm inlcuding a few to spark your interest:
CHRIS MATTHEWS, MSNBC HOST, HARDBALL: Are you satisfied with what you got from Condi today?
KRISTEN BREITWEISER, WIDOW OF 9/11 ATTACK: No, I think obviously we need to get more answers from her. I would have hoped that the commissioners would have asked more pointed questions, more questions about the substance of the threats that we were facing, more about the intelligence community, what they knew where, where the breakdown of the intel information occurred, why the national security advisor did not know that planes could be used as missiles. That’s her job.
MATTHEWS: She said it right up front, didn’t she?
BREITWEISER: She did.
LORIE VAN AUKEN, WIDOW OF 9/11 ATTACK: We also know that people stopped flying domestically. Ashcroft stopped flying. Pentagon officials stop flying the day before September 11. They were warned not fly on September 11. We think San Francisco Mayor Willie Brown was told not to fly. That’s all domestic. You know, everybody keeps telling us how they were focused outward.
MATTHEWS: You’re talking about before 9/11 they were warned?
VAN AUKEN: Yes. Yes, right.
MATTHEWS: What about the July briefing that was on domestic agencies?
MINDY KLEINBERG, WIDOW OF 9/11 ATTACK: You know, what’s unbelievable about that is that nobody followed that up. I mean they say that they told the FAA and they told the FBI, but nobody at the FAA did anything.
Nobody stepped up the protocols and procedures during that threat period. Nobody at the FBI knew that this threat was there.
And I would have liked them to continue to ask her, because apparently, she didn’t feel that was her responsibility.
MATTHEWS: You once said that she was either lying or she’s incompetent. What do you think of her now? Do you think that’s still a fair judgment, I mean if it ever was one?
BREITWEISER: I have to say, with a laundry list of questions that that Commissioner Lehman asked her, she said she didn’t know a lot of things. And I would question what exactly did she know? And if she didn’t know it, who else would know it?
It’s her job to know that information. It’s her job to relay that information to the president and to actually, in our opinion, inform the public.
If the public was better informed in the summer of 2001, lives would have been saved. Maybe the attacks wouldn’t have been prevented; but lives would have been saved.
My husband was in Tower II. If he knew that it was a terrorist attack, he wouldn’t have stayed in the building.
We spoke to a pilot’s wife, and we asked her, what do you think happened? And she said "I wish he knew that these guys knew how to fly the plane." She told us that they [pilots] were trained that they were indispensable so they wouldn’t fight a hijacking.
MATTHEWS: How far did that information get up to the ladder to the president?
VAN AUKEN: You know, that’s the question we have, the urgency question. In "Bush at War," it was quoted that Bush said he felt that al Qaeda was important but not urgent. Whose job is to convey urgency to the president if not the national security advisor, getting information from the intel. agencies up to the president?
PATTY CASAZZA, WIDOW OF 9/11 ATTACK: And it’s also disingenuous for the national security advisor to say she couldn’t have imagined planes being used as weapons.
In July, the president, Condoleezza Rice, Ari Fleischer, Karen Hughes, and Karl Rove attended the general summit in Italy. The national security advisor of that nation was aware of an assassination attempt to be committed upon our president and the leaders attending that G8 Summit in July.
How do you forget, two months later, the threat of your life, the president’s life, and not think that that threat could actually follow you home to the United States?
[snip]
MATTHEWS: Let me start with what I think was the best testimony today. It was the forced testimony at the hands of Richard Ben-Veniste, who is a professional prosecutor. And, by the way, I think a lot of people who were watching this didn’t understand what was going on.
He was insisting on the rules of the courtroom: "Answer the question; you’re the witness here." And he treated her a little rough because he wanted those answers, and she, at each case, wanted to give an essay answer and a discourse and a distraction at some point, and even a digression. And he says, 'No, I want specific answers to specific questions.'
Let me ask you about what your reactions were in hearing them. Were you surprised to hear that the document given to the president in briefing on August 6, a month before, was entitled "bin Laden determined to attack inside the United States"?
He didn’t say warn. He asked what the title was. The direct question - she didn’t want to give a direct answer. How did that hit you?
VAN AUKEN: Yes, well, we’ve known for a long time that that was the title of that briefing. They’ve been trying to keep that a secret from the public. They tried to keep it secret in the joint intelligence committee report. You know, that pretty much says it all.
MATTHEWS: How did you get this info? Because I haven’t had it. Lisa Myers had. I hadn’t had it. How did you know the title of this document? I do think it sounds like - it’s sounds like a preview at the movie theater.
CASAZZA: And you combine that with George Tenet saying it’s going to be a spectacular attack or Richard Clarke...
MATTHEWS: And you’ve got suspicious behavior in the United States.
CASAZZA: Right.
MATTHEWS: You’ve got al Qaeda people in the United States. You’ve got a guy trying to learn how to fly a plane, once it’s in the air but he doesn’t want to know how to take off or land. He wants to learn how to hijack.
KLEINBERG: And he’s in custody. You know what? I think that, for the past two years, America’s been operating under the misnomer that "we couldn’t have known, this was a surprise, nobody knew anything." And what people are learning today is that that’s not true.
MATTHEWS: Were the dots as hard to connect, after today, as they seem before today?
BREITWEISER: No it’s not. No it’s not.
MATTHEWS: Do the dots seem closer after today?
BREITWEISER: You know what? It’s not hard to do in retrospect. It’s not Monday-morning quarterbacking. You have the director of the CIA on the morning of 9/11, whose first response was "I hope this doesn’t have anything to do with that guy taking flight lessons." He was referring to Moussaoui.
BREITWEISER: And you know what? Condoleezza Rice-- It’s her job to not have that Grand Canyon [of intelligence between the director of the CIA and the president]. It is her job to fuse that information in one fusion center. And, you know what? She didn’t do it.
MATTHEWS: The president of the United States is briefed every morning by Tenet. Tenet has a mind set, which is triggered, "I know what I’m looking for, and when it comes, I’ll know what it looks like." The president thought nothing - it connected nothing to him. Does that mean he was poorly briefed?
KLEINBERG: Either [the president] he was poorly briefed or he was a good actor. I mean, he remains in a classroom. OK? When that plane hit that first building, if they were so briefed and they had an August 6 PDB and we had just been through a summer of threat, then shouldn’t the dots have connected right there at that moment for him, for Donald Rumsfeld, for General Myers?
All of them, in their testimonies, or in their discussions or in their books, have talked about how it wasn’t until after the second plane went into the second building or it wasn’t until after the Pentagon was hit that they realized what was going on.
Where is there a breakdown in communication? That you had an intelligence community with their hair on fire and yet a hijacked plane hits a building and…
BREITWEISER: And nobody reacting.
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