Can You Smell Me Now?
Of course you can't. But I'm not really asking you a question anyway. In fact, this isn't a question at all. It's the name of one of the 1,042 teams that just completed the adventurously fun 198 mile Hood to Coast relay race held in Oregon this past weekend, in which I took part in. I belong to the Utah team Leatherlungs and Jogbras.
(Teams comprise of 12 runners. Each team uses 2 vans, which transport 6 runners each. Each runner must run three legs of the 36 leg race from Mt. Hood, through Sandy, Gresham, Portland, Scappoose, St. Helens, Mist, Jewel, Olney, Astoria, Lewis & Clark, and finally to the beach in Seaside. A team takes turns running the race course day and night and day until they finish. Teams come from across the US, Mexico, Canada, South America, and Europe.)
Reading through a list of 1, 042 names is like reading a novel, a humourous one at that. I noticed that names were inspired from songs, movies, TV shows or commercials, politics, religion, gender-related terms , medical terminology, clever reworkings of cliches, and/or especially from the race itself.
Here is a list of my favorite names representing each of these categories. I do hope you read and enjoy them all. There are some mighty clever names:
Inspired from Songs, Musical Groups, or Musicology:
Girls Just Want To Have Fun
Deadhead To The Coast
Dixies Midnight Runners
Twelve Elvises
Smells Like Team Spirit
This Aint No Disco
Twisted Blister
No Doubt
Weve Got The Runs
Hoody And The Go Fish
Crash Test Dummies
It Smells Like Team Spirit
Run Dmd
Get Me To The Beach On Time
Stayin Alive
Running On Empty
Bad To The Bone
Well Be Home For Christmas
Hippy Chicks
Inspired from Movies:
The Wild Bunch
2 Fast 2 Furious
The Fit The Fat & The Elderly
Dead Lemmings Society
Mad Macs Road Warriors
True Grit
Better Than Bond Girls
Bring Out Your Dead
The Replacements
Dead Men Running
My So Called Legs
Boyz From The Hood
Desperately Seeking Seaside
Coast Busters
Fast & The Delirious
Dude Wheres My Van?
Crouching Runner Hidden Van
Twelve Monkeys
Angels And Insects
Sleepless In Scappoose
The Knights Who Say Knee
The Big Lubersky
Running Arizona
Hey Ho Off To The Beach We Go
If We Only Had A Brain
Inspired from Great Works: O Van Where Art Thou?
The Grapes Of Math
Reworkings of Cliches or Famous Sayings:
Spaghetti Set Go
Nacho Daddy
Houston We Have A Problem
Butts Sweat & Beers
Grin N Barrett
Road Kilts
You Can Run But You Cant Hide
Dont Be A Smart Pass
Bling Bling
Will Run For Beer
Religious Names: The Passion
Team Armageddon
The Amazing Grace
Fear Not The End Will Come
Team Godspeed
Isaiah 40:31
Team 666
The Saints Come Running In
Covenant Cruisers
God Seekers
Political/Historical Names: Weapons Of Ass Destruction
Rumsfelds Rear Admirals
The Donner Party
Gender/Sex Related: 12 Inches
Male Order Grooms
Four Jacks And A Jill
Newport Nauty Gulls &bad Buoy
Naked Love Pretzel
K Y Connection
Thongs? Boxers? Or Briefs?
Wood To Coast
A Dozen Butts & Nutts
Buns And Weenies To Seaside
6 Dudes And 12 Boobs
Tight Butts And Sweaty Nuts
The Tightie Whities
Medical Terminology/Body Parts/Bodily Functions: Dead On Arrival
Team Snot Rocket
Nike Dairy Airs
Toe Jammers
The Runs
Team Nads
Team Comatoes
Do You Smell Something?
I B Pro Fun
Too Much Fiber
Got Runs
The Trots
The Freudian Slips
Butt Butter
Chafed And Lubed
TV Shows/Commercials: Sole Train
Speed Racers
Masters Of The Universe
Thats All Folks!
Hollywood Squares
Oprahs Naked Book Club
Zero To 196 In 28 Hours
Can You Beer Me Now?
Can You Smell Me Now?
Femme Fatale
Live Long & Perspire
Scar Trek (This team was made of runners who have all had heart operations.)
Spongebob Slowpants
Mr Toads Wild Runners
Family Ties
All In The Family
Hood to Coast Related Names: No Walkin Til The Van Passes
Synthesis Of Beer And Insanity
Comfortably Numb
On The Verge Of Insanity
I Signed Up To Run What?
Everything Hurts
My Turn Again!?!
This Team Sucks
Call Me A Cab
Shouldve Been The Driver
Hood To Moist
Physically Bankrupt
Someone Call Me A Cab
Runs Well With Others
Oxygen Deficit
Too Stupid To Stop
On The Road To Recovery
Sultans Of Sweat
I Hurt You Hurt We All Hurt
Who Moved The Beach?
Whose Idea Was This
Shut Your Pie Hole And Run!
Hood To Comatose
I Thought This Was A 5k
Roadkill Again!?
Runnin 24/7
Kill Or Be Roadkill
Are We There Yet?
Mother Hood To Coast
Running For Krispy Kremes
Old Enough To Know Better
Speed Kills, Slow Down
Wheres Van 2?
P.S. Oh, by the way, here are the winners of the race, where they originate from, and their finishing time:
1. Ncic Allstars (Gladstone, OR) 17:36:08
2. Team Short Bus (New Paltz, NY) 18:21:28
3. Rabid Dog (Wilmington, NC) 18:31:23
4. Carolina Xc (Raleigh, NC) 18:35:57
5. Bowerman Ac (Portland, OR) 18:40:38
6. Synthesis Of Beer And Insanity (Florence, OR) 18:47:14
7. Class Act Is Back (Vancouver, WA) 18:54:15
8. Msu Alumni (Poulsbo, WA) 18:58:30
9. Santini Extra Virgins (San Francisco, CA) 19:12:01
10. Its Go Time Naked Lizards (Portland, OR) 19:18:31
P.S.S. I'll write more later on the course of the race, about team costumes and van decorations, and my experiences.
9:48:35 PM  | |
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