Film critic Peter Travers of Rolling Stone has published one of the first major publication reviews of Revenge of the Sith. Let me just tell you upfront that it is not a pretty one, especially when you consider the opening sentence is "Drink the punch."
Am I surprised? No. Nada. No sireee. Nil. Nope. Not in the least.
If you have read my previous posts regarding Revenge of the Sith, you’ll be familiar with the concerns I’ve vocalized:
From my May 7 post titled A Revelation: Fans Taking Over, I talked about one radio critic saying that he had seen the first 45 minutes of the film and said that he’d give this film an A +. I commented that "maybe Lucas pulled his head out and wrote a decent script and instilled in his actors better direction so they don't look like animated cardboard stand-ups!"
And lo and behold, Peter’s review validates my concerns. Consider these paragraphs:
Heralded for its savagery (my God, it's rated PG-13), the film follows Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen -- to merely call him wooden is an affront to puppets everywhere) as he loses his limbs and his conscience and takes on the evil mantle of Darth Vader. But thematic darkness is no excuse for dimness in all other departments, except the visual.
In this heretic's opinion, Sith is a stiff, brought down by that special knack Lucas has of turning flesh-and-blood actors into cardboard cutouts. To hear Anakin and his pregnant wife, Senator Padme (the vivacious Natalie Portman rendered vacant), discuss their marriage -- a secret that could get Anakin defrocked as a Jedi -- is to redefine stilted for a new millennium. The minute any character -- human or droid -- opens a mouth to speak, your eyes glaze over.
But hey, I have to do something in celebration of the release of Revenge of the Sith this week. So, I'm re-posting some of the movie titles I came up with for the film last August when they announced the title of the film.
(Some of these titles I took from other films since Revenge of the Sith seems a ripoff of Revenge of the Nerds anyway.)
NOTE: If you come up with a title, feel free to leave it in the Comments page.
Apocalypse A Long Time Ago in a Galaxy Far Far Away
Annie Flies Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Annie Goes Goth
Annie Without A Cause
Annie Becomes a Dead-beat Dad
Annie Gets Really Mad
The Sith Connection
End of An Empire
Death of a Jedi
Return of Another Mediocre Film But At Least This is the Last One
Crouching Jedi, Hidden Sith
Gone With the Force
Anakin Skywalker and the Master's Light Saber
Princess Amidali and the Seven Jedi
And just for George Lucas:
Star Wars Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Focus on the Special Effects
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