Anonymous: Sodomites

Mon, 06 Dec 2004 06:26:20 GMT

Last Post (I think)

This is the last post on this site. My new blog is here. If you want to keep up with the haps of Shane then go to my new blog. If you link to me then please, please take a moment and update your links with my new address.

Mon, 18 Oct 2004 17:55:25 GMT

Mary Cheney - Professional Dyke

One of my major pet peeves about the gay community has been its love of gay kids with celebrity/politician parents. Because so many homos are so in thrall to celebs themselves they naturally feel that the gay child of someone famous will be able to catch the attention of straights: "CHER'S daughter is a lesbian? Wow... maybe the gays aren't so bad afterall!" and so this thinking goes.

Lesbian for sale to highest bidder!

Famous parents and connections in high places included!

If you're non-talented and gay and happen to have a famous parent then the least you're assured of is a job at one of the constantly-infighting and ineffective homo organizations like NGLTF or HRC.

Witness Candice Gingrich, the dykey half-sister of former House Speaker Newt Gingrich. For awhile after ol' Candace burst out of the Wal-Mart closet she'd been hiding in, she was everywhere HRC wanted her to be. Always smiling and always wearing the same sad K-Mart styled suit (dark blue with white piping) she showed that... it's possible for Repubs to have dykey sisters with bad taste as well!

My point being that the recent flap over Mary Cheney's lezzie orientation is ridiculous because Mary Cheney has been a professional dyke for as long as I can remember. She worked for Coors as their "Liason to the Gay and Lesbian community" for years and if that doesn't make one a professional homo then I don't know what does. Mary hasn't been in the closet for ages and has milked both her lesbianism and her connections to the Bush White House for all they're worth.

Which is why the flap over her "outting" by John Kerry is all the more ridiculous. Mary was never "in" and both her father and mother have mentioned her sapphic tendencies whenever it benefits them or their campaigns. In addition it's unbelievable to see the Repubs painting themselves as being uber-sensitive when the Texas Republican party called for gays to be fired from their jobs!

The country is going to hell-in-a-handbasket under Bush and this flap is all the more ridiculous with the terrible problems we have facing us. Mary Cheney has been a professional dyke for as long as anyone can remember and to insinuate she was somehow "taken advantage of" by Kerry is outlandish. Especially considering the sad fact that Mary Cheney has been "taking advantage" of herself long before John Kerry got around it, and she's now allowing the Republicans, a party that hates gays and does everything it can to make their lives miserable, to take advantage and use her as well.

Who's the real victim here? I can tell you for sure its not Mary Cheney.

Thu, 07 Oct 2004 06:57:08 GMT

Would you pay for sex?

This is a question that arose on my trip to India and the Philippines. Not for me of course, I have a boyfriend. But my co-worker is straight, and single and he posed that question to me in the Philippines. My answer?

Yes.

I'm a Libertarian. I believe people pretty much have the right to do what they want with their bodies and I don't consider prostitution to be exploitation of women, nor of men. That decrepit Andrea Dworkin-style argument lacks both substance and merit and has no grounding in reality.

While I haven't had sex for money I have had sex with men for other things, especially when I was in college, not so much spoken as unspoken. In the end it's all prostitution and the girl who fucks a guy after he takes her to a nice dinner or gives her an Asprey brooch is no different than the tired, old whore shivering on the corner of Hunts Point. Most of us have done it, one way or the other.

Available here.

But back to my trip. My co-worker is an attractive, Southern California-style surfer boy, with the accent to match. Any chick would find him cute but his perspective was it would take too much work to land a girl for the night, and for $50.00 a day he could have a girlfriend the entire time we were there. I told him to go for it, and furthermore said if I weren't in a monogomous relationship I'd consider the same thing.

In the end he didn't have the time, and neither did I. Work takes a lot out of you and when you've got a wonderful, sexy Jewish doctor waiting at home guys like Ben (pic above) just don't seem to do it anymore.

Sat, 18 Sep 2004 21:43:14 GMT

Congressman David Dreier - Closeted gay, living a lie

Yes, it's time for another homo Republican congressman to be outed. In this case it's David Dreier, who represents the 26th district here in California.

Here is just some of Dreier's pathetic record on gay and lesbian rights, courtesy of blogactive.com:

Voted FOR the Defense of Marriage Act (1996)
Voted FOR the Marriage Protection Act (2004)
Opposed the Employment Non-Discrimination Act, ENDA (1996, 1997, 1999)
Opposed the Hate Crimes Prevention Act (1997)
Supported allowing federally funded charities to discriminate against gays and lesbians, despite local laws. (2001)
Voted to prohibit lesbians and gays in DC from adopting children - 3,000 miles from his district! (1998)
Opposed the Housing Opportunities for People with AIDS (HOPWA) program. (1996)
Opposed increases in State AIDS Drug Assistance Program (1997)
Opposed the restoration of funding to HOPWA (1998)

David thinks he can continue to oppose gay marriage, gay and lesbian workplace rights and gay and lesbian adoption and still run around in DC's Dupont Circle district and pick up guys for a quick fuck. Well, those days are over. Congressman David Dreier is a closeted homosexual who publicly opposes gay rights. By making that choice he's lost his right to privacy and I'm happy to trumpet the news here: David Dreier is GAY!!

Mon, 30 Aug 2004 00:20:38 GMT

I've Got Some Things To Say...

Crystal Meth

I read the best piece today in the Style section of the Sunday NY Times about crystal meth and its effects on the gay community.

Some quotes from the article:

Crystal meth "turns people into antisocial zombies," said Trip Zanetis, 23, a nightclub publicist who said he hates what it is doing to his social world. "It makes people hostile and delusional. The vibe is much more negative and colder than in the past, thanks to this drug."

Dr. Steven Lee, a New York psychiatrist who specializes in treating crystal meth addicts, said there is now "a much harder edge in New York gay clubs than in the past." This change, he said, is largely because of the drug: in addition to its sexual and stimulant effects, crystal meth promotes aggression.

"Some of my patients talk about how they feel on crystal meth as akin to being robots programmed with the sole purpose of doing more crystal and having more sex," Dr. Lee said. The drug also causes paranoia in regular users, and can eventually lead to psychotic episodes.

...Aficionados of the scene say dance clubs have become sterile environments filled with monotonous music and detached dancers.

..."crystal is by far the worst drug I've ever seen happen to night life. It not only takes over people's lives, but it really negates what the whole scene is supposed to be about."

Finally more people are coming to the same conclusion. Crystal kills. It's a terribly negative drug which is wreaking havoc on the gay community. Crystal destroys friendships and relationships, it kills personality and it's killing the fun and free spirit that used to be so much part of gay nightlife.

Jews Spying for Israel

I'll withhold judgement as to whether the allegations against Larry Franklin, AIPAC and Israel are proven true or not but if they are then that's a big problem for Israel.

As a Jew my loyalties are to the United States and not to Israel. Yet Jews like Jonathan Pollard place their loyalty to Israel above that to this country and that helps cement in some people's minds the idea that Jews are untruthworthy, a fifth column that will do anything to undermine the United States in support of Israel. It's an absurd thought but stories like this one only make it seem more true to many people.

And that bring to the forefront the campaign by many American and Israeli Jews to free convicted Israeli spy Jonathan Pollard. President Clinton was reportedly close to pardoning him in 2000 and only did not because the heads of the CIA and the FBI threatened to resign if he did.

Let's be clear on one issue: Jonathan Pollard did more damage to US intelligence capabilities than any spy in history. He gave to Israel details on code-breaking algorythms, weaponry, Soviet troop movements and more. This information wasn't used by Israel to defend itself, contrary to the claims of many of Pollard's defenders. Rather Israel sold this information to the Soviet Union in exchange for the freedom of Soviet Jews. I don't necessarily hold that against Israel, after all, every nation always acts in its own interests regardless of the costs to others. But don't try and act like Pollard was some benevolent bike messenger delivering low-grade intelligence on the PLO. He committed treason against the United States and if anyone deserved execution for spying it was Pollard.

I have little patience for the claims of Pollard's defenders that "Israel should have had this information anyway." It's not for them, nor for Israel to make that decision. Israel has no right to claim it deserves full and unfettered access to American intelligence whenever it wants and to claim it does is astonishing and ridiculous.

If Israel is again running a counter-intelligence operation against the United States using American Jews and AIPAC as cover then the questions won't stop about what else Israel has been up to in the US. Its economic espionage against the US in Silicon Valley, Los Alamos and the research corridor near Boston are legendary, so Israel saying it has no "intelligence assets" in the United States is laughable. The question that remains is to what extend Jews will go in supporting Israel, and to what extent Israel will go in using American Jews for its own interests.

Paul Hamm's Medal

As a former gymnast I'll say one thing that many people don't understand about gymnastics, the scoring system is enormously complicated. I never was able to do a routine that had a cumulative point value of anything higher than a 9.0 but even after being scored at that level I would be reminded by my coach about how many tenths and fifths came off because of this mistake and that mistake. Try looking at a judges scoring card sometime if you get the chance. A routine lasting not longer than a minute often times will result in a single scoring page covered with dashes and pluses, sometimes more than 50 or 60. That means the judge is marking second by second and there are many, many errors and bonuses that often times aren't counted or seen by judges.

What does this have to do with Hamm? The Korean who supposedly "deserved" the gold medal did a routine with a value of 10.0 if done perfectly. The judges gave him credit for a routine worth 9.9, that much is true. The videotapes have been reviewed and it's been proven he did complete a routine worth 10.0, that much is true.

But those videotapes also showed another mistake, and this time it was on the part of the Korean. He made a mistake that would have resulted in a .10 deduction which wasn't factored in by the judges. If they're now going to start reviewing tapes of gymnast's performances AFTER the fact then they're going to have to add in the deductions as well as the gains.

The medal is Hamms and the Koreans and others should accept this and move on.

Sun, 22 Aug 2004 19:16:25 GMT

Open Relationships are for Losers

Ever seen the bumper sticker or t-shirt that says "Rehab is for quitters?" I like that because it shows just how gung-ho most Americans are on anything, and how often we refuse to give in, even if it's in our best interests.

One area that I've blogged on previously is that of open relationships. I've never been in one and when my ex-boyfriend suggested the idea I knew it was time to call it quits, for good. I can't stand the idea of someone having sex with my boyfriend and if I'm not enough for him then we should break up. Yet there exists within the gay community a strong line of thought that says that most men are sexual addicts and one might as well admit that, fuck around as much as one wants AND be in a relationship at the same time.

Bullshit. It all comes back to the same idea I've been articulating for a long time. Most gay men aren't sexual addicts or whores but instead are little boys playing like they're men. What kind of person can call themselves a man when to them being gay and male is all about the right to fuck and suck as much as one wants, wherever one wants and whenever one desires, regardless of the costs to ourselves or our community? That attitude is the height of narcissism, but as most gay men are excessively narcissistic themselves that would seem to fit into the prevailing ethos of the gay community.

In the words of a fellow blogger:

Most people lie about sex, just ask Bill Clinton. I think a lot of people even lie to themselves about sex. There is a blogger (this one I'll link to) that wrote about a couple that he's known a long time that prided themselves on their monogamous relationship. The blogger is a doctor and just wrote them both a prescription for antibiotics to treat their gonorrhea.

I used to think one of the most refreshing things about being gay was that I didn't have to subscribe to the social norms about sex anymore.

The underlying idea behind this statement is that again most gay men are sluts and liars and it's a lot easier to just admit that and give into the temptation of an open relationship than say to yourself: "I love this guy and am in a relationship and that means I am going to have to do without sex with anyone other than my boyfriend, especially if he doesn't want me to have an open relationship." Instead there are gay men who "give in" to their boyfriend's desires to have an open relationship or decide to ignore the dalliances they know are going on the side. The example this blogger gives is further proof that at least to him most gay men are liars, so better to just admit you're going to fuck around and get rid of all that bullshit about being faithful to one man.

The other issue here is the one of "social norms about sex." Being gay is outside the "norm" of sexual behavior but that doesn't mean gay people have to go all the way and establish themselves as non-monogamous sexual obsessives, as if to prove the point of straights that we're incapable of the same type of love as themselves. One doesn't have to ape the behavior of straights (God forbid) but neither do we have to establish chains of bathhouses for quick and easy fucking (and HIV transmission) and constantly trumpet the joys of non-monogamy. Isn't it time to admit that we're giving our enemies on the Right all the ammunition they need, and more?

It's sad that in this day and age gay men are still arguing about what's better, an open or closed relationship and close behind whether it's a good idea to open up the bathhouses again. It seems that for every step forward we take another two steps back.

Sat, 21 Aug 2004 21:27:48 GMT

Twirling at Twilo

Previously I waxed nostalgic about a club I'd never been too, Studio 54. Now I can talk about one I actually visited, the old Twilo in New York City.

Occupying the former location of Sound Factory, and still with the same DJ (Junior Vasquez) Twilo was a kick-ass club. What I remember most about the club, beyond the massive quantities of drugs circulating around, was the fierce sound system and the nitrogen blast that would come down every so often. God that place would get hot and then you'd hear this sound that was like the gathering of a million rain drops and it would expand until it seemed like it filled every pore and then the cold blast of nitrogen-cooled air would pour down on the dancefloor.

The first time I went to Twilo was in the summer of 2000 to see Paul Van Dyke on a Friday. The club was so crowded it was unbearable, and the heat was so intense I thought I'd see people passing out. Instead I had a great time (as I always do when I see PVD) and went back Saturday for after-hours gay night.

That night was insane. I remember sitting on the steps leading out the back door of Twilo with my friend Stephen and next to us laying against a wall was this shirtless Asian guy who had taken WAY too much G. He was passed out and drooling all over himself. Every so often one of his friends would tear themselves away from the dance floor and check that he was still alive. At 7:00 AM Stephen and I decided to head out, I had a flight to Boston to catch that day, and as we exited Twilo there was a guy lying passed-out beside the door inside the club with his pants pulled down to his knees. Outside the bright morning light hit us like cold water and we could see there was a line of people 2 blocks long waiting to get inside the club.

I have some cool mixes from Sasha and Digweed that I'll post later for your enjoyment.

Update: Enjoy the mixes here:http://www.streamload.com/Fear_This_Factor/Music called Sasha and Diggers at Twilo

Fri, 20 Aug 2004 03:37:42 GMT

Discovering 54

I have this slight obsession with Studio 54. I wasn't young enough to remember it but I still remember hearing about it in the 80's. Studio 54 is something that everyone vaguely knows about, even if they don't know much. I had a boyfriend who remembered his parents getting dressed to go to Studio 54 in the 70's and that's about as close as I've ever come to the club, until now.

I recently acquired a Studio 54 folder with a guest list inside. The folder has Studio 54's logo and address on the front and written at the top is "The Islanders." Inside are around 20 pages with type-written pieces of paper taped on them. On the type-written pieces of paper are names and addresses, mostly of men, and at the top of the first page is again written "The Islanders." I was curious about who these people could be, they lived all over New York and most of the names are men, with an occasional women. Their addresses ranged from the prestigious to ghetto and some were listed with their place of work.

So I bought a book about Studio 54 and inside I discovered just who "The Islanders" were. They were a group of gay Fire Island Disco devotees who were regulars at Studio 54. The list was one used to decide who got in the door and who didn't.

Knowing the toll AIDS took on the gay male population of New York City I doubt many of them are alive, but still I sit and wonder who each person was and imagine them dancing the night away in the most famous club in history with no concerns in the world except how to be more fabulous than the next guy. I bet not a single one of them imagined that in 2004 a guy who wasn't even 6 years old in 1977 would own a list of their names, and be discovering their story 27 years after they lived it.

Sat, 14 Aug 2004 08:28:08 GMT

No Love Without the Guv

Anyone remember what is a katsa? To jog your memory think of William Safire and then maybe it'll come to you. Still not there? A katsa is a sleeper agent for the Mossad and I have no doubt that's what Golan Cipel is. Please, I mean, he was in the IDF and then was "introduced" to the governor at a party in Israel??? Does anyone really think the Israelis don't pay close attention to up-and-coming politicans like McGreevey?

His best years are behind him

Watching James McGreevey's announcement that he was not only a homo but had also cheated on his wife with another man I couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Here's a guy who is obviously extremely intelligent, driven, attractive and successful and he's spent his entire life living a lie. At least he wasn't one of those closeted anti-gay Republicans who ended up dying of AIDS like Roy Cohn, but still, it's bad enough.

So now who to believe? Is McGreevey a serial same-sex sexual harasser or is Golan a gold-digging wannabe kept boy? I'd put my funds on McGreevey. As a Jew I can't believe anyone would move to the US for a $32,000 a year job. For my people that's a drop in the bucket barely covering our monthly payments on the condo in Boca. Golan is either a katsa or he was in love with the guv and my money's on the love.

Tue, 10 Aug 2004 02:33:10 GMT

Gay Male Sexuality

The topic of gay male sexuality and fidelity is so boring and played out. So why am I writing about it again?

Well, I was thinking the other day about how many gay men are just willing to give up on monogamy and embrace open relationships as the standard. The thought process usually goes this way:

Men are "hard-wired" to be promiscuous, so you can either embrace your sluttiness or turn yourself into a liar.

The reasoning of the above statement is that gay men are either dogs or liars and you better embrace one path or another. Isn't that sad?

I think back to my relationships and wonder how I managed to stay monogamous, with the exception of a mutually agreed-upon threesome every now and then. I had an ex who once told me "Shane, you're a lot better at monogamy than most gay men" but I don't think that's true. What am I good at is dedication and commitment and not wanting to have my cake and eat it too. Life in many ways is about sacrifice and most gay men aren't willing to engage in that. Like little boys they want it all, now, and when they don't get it they're not too pleasant to be around.

See, its become more and more clear to me that for many gay men life is nothing more than extended period of adolescence, but with the dangerous addition of sex, drugs and money. How else can one explain it when you see 45 year-old men drugged out on the dance floor wearing completely non age-appropriate frat boy getups? I know so many gay men who refer to sex as "playing" as if we're all in the sandbox together instead of fucking each other's asses. Instead of "toys" we now have drugs and their accoutrements. Instead of real friends we have "party buddies" who are gone the minute the drugs run out, or even before.

This is easy for us because most gay men have such difficulty either finding a boyfriend or maintaining a relationship because of societal pressures and the pathologies we've nurtured amongst ourselves. Most of us don't have kids, we don't have a family and a good portion don't have anything to do with their birth families. So what steps into that void for many? Sex, drugs, addiction and alcohol.

I'm not casting blame here. 4 years ago, while I was in my late 20's, I remember sitting in my living room before a night out hopped up on pills and K and thinking "All I want to do with my life is make money and party" and that's exactly what I did. I partied through Seattle, New York, London, Johannesburg, Montreal, Los Angeles and Vancouver, with myriad stops in-between. I played with the big boys and unlike most of them I'm still standing and I count my lucky stars I didn't end up addicted to Crystal or HIV+ like so many.

I had enough self-awareness that I remember one Sunday morning being up for more than 24 hours with everyone sitting around still high and listening to trance music and thinking "How is this ever going to end?" It was then I realized how deeply I'd fallen into that life and resolved to get myself out. I can reel off name after name of those around me who didn't and it saddens me terribly because there was once such joy and fun in that world until the drugs gradually snuck in and took over everything.

Anyway, I'm rambling and I don't know what made me think about this topic. Maybe because my niece was here and it felt for a little while like she was my own kid, and now I realize that's what I really want and need, that in a way that's my destiny. I'm glad I made it this far and I'm excited about what the future holds.

Sat, 07 Aug 2004 02:33:16 GMT

Everything that's wrong with homos

I've been going back and forth, back and forth with a guy on the issue of gay men having sex in public. I'm against it, period. I don't buy the stale argument that "sex is liberation" as he keeps re-stating. Nor am I going to stop pointing out that gay male promiscuity is responsible for the HIV epidemic of the 80's. It's fact, it's indisuptable and I'm not a Republican for saying so. The fact remains that his view is held by a small minority in the gay community which receives far too much attention in the gay world because they're loud and they never shut up.

It's the same old song but I'll never tire of singing it. Until gay men learn to stop fucking so many partners we'll never get a handle on the HIV/AIDS epidemic. Bathhouses are primary conduits for infections and should be closed, everywhere, as they were in San Francisco in 1984. Oh, and Michel Foucault is a fraud.

Wed, 28 Jul 2004 22:28:25 GMT

The Glamorization of HIV... a call to action

In its rush to redeem itself for its early, unwarranted fears about AIDS the gay community has now accomplished the exact opposite: it has glamorized and made acceptable the idea amongst gay men that HIV is not only inevitable, but sexy and glamorous. Horrifying? Yes, but it's the truth and it's also the dirty little secret that no gay person wants to talk about or admit to.

In the 90's when I came out of the closet contracting HIV was just possibly the worst thing that could happen to a young, gay boy. Our images of HIV-infected gay men were those of wasted, diseased looking skeletons and worse. The message was drilled into our head that we must use a condom, all the time. To not do so was irresponsible and unacceptable and would lead to death. Those images were powerful, with physical attraction a value paramount amongst gay men (including myself) who would want to risk looking like that?

Then in the mid-90's something started to change. Like a dark whisper we heard rumors that with the advent of protease inhibitors. HIV wouldn't be so horrible, it would be an easily manageable disease like diabetes. Around us we began seeing ads for these new drugs filled with hunky looking guys climbing mountains. "It wouldn't be so bad" some of us thought and then the rates of HIV infections began to climb again.

Following the wonder drugs came the stereotype of the "poz" gay guy. There he was, staring from the covers of Out and The Advocate, no longer covered with purple Kaposi Sarcoma lesions but instead bursting with muscles from his weekly, doctor-prescribed injections of Human Growth Hormone (HGH) and testosterone. He was the "three h's" that we gay men love, Hot, Hunky and Hung and he was also HIV+ but no longer ashamed. HIV was now an acceptable way of being, no longer did "poz" men have to hide in the dark corners of the dance floors, their bodies wasted and covered with sores. Now they were in the center with the rest of us. They're here, they're Poz, get used to it!

And so we did. In our hunger to accept our Poz brothers we started sending out the message that HIV was no longer so bad, that in a way it was sexy and glamorous and you too could look like those guys on the covers of Out. Poz was the new gay, hip and exciting and kinda exclusive. Boring old gay was no longer the "it girl" she used to be.

And where are we now? HIV infection rates are climbing again, young gay men find it deliciously tantalizing to chose the partner who will "breed" them with HIV, as if they were choosing a surrogate for their baby instead of looking for a disgustingly immoral and developmentally retarded person to infect them with a deadly disease. Our gay organizations stoke the fires higher and higher, preferring to preach the dogma of "inclusivity" rather than state the obvious: that HIV kills and if you're deliberately trying to get infected you need to have your head checked. They should be teaching that HIV is not a wonderful thing for our community but instead a devastating disease which has robbed us of some of our best and brightest, and our failure to stamp it out is our shame.

I'm not willing to accept what many in the gay community consider inevitable, and that is that HIV will be around forever and we should concentrate on making HIV positive men feel better about themselves instead of trying to control the disease and stamp it out. What are we doing when instead of concentrating on promotion of safe-sex we're telling HIV positive men how to find ways to date one another and that choosing to infect another person with HIV is "a private choice?"

We have established the message that life with HIV is no longer something to be avoided but instead can be just as rewarding and fun as life without. We have sent the message, inadvertently or not, that contracting HIV is now just another lifestyle choice, and one that is not only acceptable but subtly encouraged by gay organizations who have 30 meeting groups for "poz" guys but 5 for those that are negative.

Friend after friend of mine is now HIV+ and I thank G-d that I'm not. I have enough self-awareness and self-esteem to see HIV for what it is. A disgusting, dirty little disease that will limit your life choices forever after you contract it. You'll be stuck taking medications for the rest of your life that will eventually destroy your liver and the rest of your body, giving you sunken cheeks and a humpback like a camel. It's not sexy, it's not glamorous and it's not inevitable. I know I know this but what about the 22 year old kid who doesn't?

Mon, 19 Jul 2004 08:51:48 GMT

That fundraiser

Yeah, it was a PC lovefest. After all it was in Berkeley right?

It started out with a little song singing by some white wanna-be folk singer and a fierce black lesbian who actually had a great voice. They wanted us to sing "This little light of mine" but I declined and instead headed to the bar for another glass of their mediocre chardonnay (what does one expect for $250.00 a head anyway).

Then the US Rep. from Berkeley was introduced as a "champion for peace and social justice" and when you know anyone is introduced as being in favor of "social justice" they're gonna be a big ol' tired leftist. And Barbara Lee (Babs) from Berkeley certainly fits that bill. In addition to being a tired old leftist she's also one of the most anti-Israel members of congress. I ground my teeth through the whole sordid speech and refused to stand and applaud for her at the end.

After Babs we were introduced to more tired leftists lawmakers like the mayor of Berkeley and all these other boring politicians. My memory is a bit clouded because I made repeated trips to the bar to drink wine, it was the only way I could keep my strength up and prevent myself from erupting in a huge burst of laughter through out the sad spectacle.

But it was cool to see Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, the founders of one of the oldest gay rights organizations introduced. They're both really cool women. And the former Secretary of Defense, William Perry, spoke as well.

Other than that it was a PC lovefest that drove me crazy, in particular Mark Leno, the way too-tan gay Rep. from San Francisco, complaining about California Gov. Arnold calling the Dems in the Assembly "girly men." If this is how little the gay community has advanced, that Arnold calling them Girly Men in homage to a certain SNL skit, is so terrible then I'm ashamed to call myself gay. Girly men or not I don't give a rat's ass. Get over it.

Sun, 18 Jul 2004 21:02:00 GMT

The over use of OUT amongst the gays

Today the Good Doc and I are off to this gay and lesbian fundraiser for the Kerry-Edwards ticket in the People's Republic of Berkeley. Now this fundraiser is cheaper at $250.00 a ticket than that last one we went to, but I have an unpleasant feeling that it's going to turn into one of those PC love fests that I hate so much. Tom Ammiano is going to get on stage, with his nasal, queeny voice and prance around screeching about some strange, marginal issue like calling pets "animal companions" or supporting the rights of native American transgendered, two-spirited people to open their own casinos. Sometimes I wonder why a person must go to these things.

The event is called "Out Front for Kerry" and that got me thinking. Why is the word "out" used so frequently amongst homos? Out Magazine, Out and Proud, Out of the Closet... and the list goes on. I came "out" when I was 18 and most of the homos that I know who are younger than me came out even younger. It seems my generation (and I'm 33) was the last to "play it straight" and the ones to follow are increasingly comfortable with being "out." That being said, will "coming out" lose its power amongst the gays?

I can think of a lot more words that are more powerful to me than "out." I'll leave them to your imagination but this continual use of "out" to signify gayness is grating on my nerves a bit these days. Take this fundraiser for example. "Out Front for Kerry" seems to indicate that homos are "out" for Kerry but that's a bit redundant because if myself and my boyfriend are attending a $250.00 a person fundraiser for John Kerry along with several thousand other sodomites and lezzies, and shitloads of gay politicians as well as the media isn't it a given that we're "out" for Kerry? Would someone "in" contribute money for a gay and lesbian fundraiser?

Most of the people in charge of these sorts of events are the old guard of the gay movement, they're in their 40's and 50's and they've been around for it all, so coming out is still a big deal to them. But if you're younger, and have never been "in" whom do you have to come out to? It's sorta like the whole "top and bottom" argument that seemed in vogue in the 70's. Are you a top or a bottom? Well, I thought the whole point was that you could be both!

The tendency toward catergorizing homos and celebrating "outness" is an outgrowth of the PC, leftist culture that has dominated gay thinking since the early 70's. It classifies gay people as "separate" and then further catergorizes them as "Leather-identified", "Transsexual", "Dyke", "Queer" and on and on. It's an old style of thinking that seems to indicate that everyone's feelings need to be validated, because if you're not making everyone happy then something is wrong with the picture. It leads to endless, pointless debates on issues like whether male-to-female transsexuals should be allowed into all "wimmin" music festivals. Who gives a shit? Aren't there other, more important issues to be concerned about, like the rapid increase in HIV and other STD infections amongst gay men and the glamorization of HIV amongst younger gay men?

Wed, 14 Jul 2004 18:36:36 GMT

Those that live in glass houses....

Shouldn't throw stones. Isn't that how the saying goes? Well Matt Drudge, who's a closeted fag himself, should be careful about who he calls gay. His latest target is the Kerry-Edwards tickets whom he demonizes here. Unfortunately for Drudge both Kerry and Edwards are happily married, whereas he's suspiciously single and well known to be a closet rope smoker.

Homo

It's the same old song but I'll never get tired of singing it. Matt Drudge is a fag, a closeted homosexual and that fact is backed up by evidence. Any questions? Ask David Brock, who Drudge asked out on a date and who documented the hilarious debacle that was Drudge's clumsy attempt at homosexual seduction in his book, Blinded by the Right.

Update: It seems I'm not the only one to notice the inherent contradiction in Drudge's fascination with homoeroticism in politics. Data Lounge noticed it as well!

Mon, 12 Jul 2004 08:59:40 GMT

Peachez

That's the name of the new little kitten we picked up at the SFSPCA on Saturday. She's a sweet little Siamese that I think will make a great addition to our household. We have two other cats and one loves Peachez and is already showing her the ropes, while the other growls and hisses, he'll come around eventually. The dynamic between them is going to be cool to watch, the other two cats are declawed while Peachez is not and will not be so. I'm hoping she turns into as fierce as a mouser as our other so she can help rid the forested slope behind our house of rats and mice.

Sunday we went to brunch at the top of the Bank of America building on the 56th floor. What an amazing view from up there. Basically it's a 180' degree view from Twin Peaks to Oakland with everything in between at your feet. We went with our sweet friend Brian and his new boyfriend Michael, a great guy with a beautiful square-cut jaw who is a 4th year medical student. They seem like they're really grooving on one another and I love seeing that, ir reminds me of when I was 23 and in love.

Not like I'm all jaded and shit, God knows I love my boyfriend. But there's real sweetness and light there when you love someone at that age. A pure, burning innocence and a belief they can do no wrong. Do you remember that? When the guy (or chick) you were in-love with was your whole world, like you were immersed in them. I like seeing it in Brian's face and I wish he and Michael all the best.

Sun, 11 Jul 2004 03:39:12 GMT

Gays and Guns

We went to San Francisco's only gun shop today to purchase a pistol. Well, that was our aim until I was informed that because I don't have a California DL or ID (I still have my Washington DL) I wasn't eligible, although the Good Doc was. In addition one has to take a test to measure firearms apptitude which if passed allows a person to handle and purchase a pistol.

Even though I couldn't get the permit necessary to get a gun I asked if I could take the test to qualify for the permit and if I passed I could just have it on file and come back next week when I get my California DL. The gun guy agreed so I took the test, which was filled with true or false questions like "Firing a gun into the air is both illegal and dangerous" and multiple choice questions like "When children are in the house a gun should be stored: A. In a cabinet B. In a bedside table C. Under the bed D. None of the above."

Needless to say I passed. The test was 30 questions and I missed three. The Good Doc took his and he missed two so he now can legally purchase a pistol. I can't wait to turn my ID in next week and get my California ID so I can buy a nice Glock or Sager pistol. Even though I'll still have to wait 10 days for the mandatory background check. In the meantime we're sleeping with our security system armed and trying to be more conscious of stalker, psycho ex-boyfriends.

Sat, 10 Jul 2004 01:54:26 GMT

Crazy Ex

Isn't it true that we all have a crazy ex in our lives? Some of us are fortunate enough to have only one while others suffer the misfortune of having several.

My boyfriend (aka: The Good Doc) has a crazy ex he dated when he lived in San Diego. This ex developed a strange, obsessive attachment on the Good Doc which culminated in the crazy ex assaulting him and tearing his shirt (which was a fabulous Dolce and Gabanna!!!) one evening outside his home. In addition my boyfriend's neighbors called him on one occasion to let him know that the obsessive ex was sneaking around outside his home while attempting to look into the windows. Well, to make a long story short my boyfriend has (had?) a restraining order against the obsessive ex in San Diego county.

I don't want to go into details on the obsessive ex's issues but rest assured they're numerous and sad. Recently he has been contacting my boyfriend via e-mail, and having managed to find out where the Good Doc worked, called there, spoke to my boyfriend's administrative assistant ( who is no longer his assistant) and got his personal cell phone number. I warned the Good Doc about continuing to maintain contact with the obsessive ex (when dealing with these types of people it's best to cut off all contact and not to respond when they reach out to you) but my boyfriend is a kind, sometimes too kind, person and he thought that responding to the obsessive ex would calm him down.

Well that was a bad move. Now in addition to the obsessive ex having my boyfriend's new San Francisco cell phone number he has managed to get our home address. How do I know this? He sent an e-mail to the Good Doc asking about the "birthday card" he sent to him and stating he knew where we lived.

I grew up in a single-parent family and my mom had the unfortunate habit of getting involved with men who were obsessive and abusive. I remember us coming home one night and finding out little apartment trashed by my sister's father Gene, our clothing slashed to pieces, curtains torn to shreds and later was told as an adult by my mother that Gene had jacked-off on the mirror in her bedroom. When we left the apartment we found the ignition wires in our car had been cut. Gene had waited for us to get home and then attempted to prevent us from leaving.

Later that evening we thought we found sanctuary in my grandfather's house on the outskirts of Durango but Gene had followed our car there and broke in in the middle of the night and tried to kidnap my sister, I remember being 7 years old and my brother and I holding each other and screaming as my sister's father tried in vain to pull my two-year old sister out of my mother's arms. All of this ended with my grandfather running into the room and attempting to shoot my sister's father. He missed but that scared Gene badly enough that he ran out the back door and managed to escape over the Colorado border into Arizona. Back then custody disputes were handled state-by-state and "custodial interference" didn't exist, so he knew if he got out of Colorado he would get away, and he did.

After that we lived in dread. We slept with a thick iron bar across our door, my sister wasn't allowed to play outside without my mother there and at day care none of us were allowed to be outside with the other kids. Gene would taunt my mother by leaving notes in our mailbox describing what my mom and sister were wearing that day, letting us know that he would be back, that he was watching. We never escaped this climate of fear until we moved away from Colorado to Oregon. Kind of a fucked-up way for a kid to grow up, aye?

Dealing with a crazy ex? Try this method, it works everytime!

Why do I bring this up now? Because I know what it's like to live in fear, and more than anyone else I know I am aware of how to deal with these types of dangerously obsessive personalities. I told my boyfriend that if the obsessive ex shows up at our house in San Francisco he's going to see the open end of a pistol and I mean business. I lived though this as a kid and I can tell you there's no damn way I'm going to do the same as an adult.

Fri, 09 Jul 2004 18:09:24 GMT

Outing Season in DC

Several organizations and activists in DC have taken it upon themselves to begin "outing" closeted gay staff members of Representatives and Senators that support the Federal Marriage Amendment, which would ban gay marriage.

Senator Barbara Mikulski - Closeted Lesbian

I agree 100%. If you're a closeted homo working for a senator or representative who says flat out that they would fire any openly gay people working on their staff then you have no right to expect the gay community to support your pathetic attempt to hide who you are. Your subterfuge is your own cross to bear and we don't have to make it any easier for you.

Oh yeah, and thank Barbara Mikulski, you big-ass lesbian, for FINALLY coming out against the FMA just days before the Senate begins debate on the issue. Everyone who knows anything figured out a long time ago that you were a dyke and you've been re-elected numerous times since. Get over it already, we got over it years ago.

Mark Foley - Closeted Republican

Fri, 09 Jul 2004 06:46:45 GMT

Wonder Woman - Even Better Than When You Were a Kid

This first-season DVD set of Wonder Woman was delivered to my house today. All gay men and people of discriminating taste should own this DVD series. Now I can't wait until the 2nd season!

Wed, 07 Jul 2004 00:55:26 GMT

Old Seattle Pics

I had a couple of disposable cameras lying around that were more than a year old which I developed this week. They each had pictures on them from when I lived in Seattle. I copied a couple pictures from Gus Presents Mass Seattle, which I went to over Memorial Day 2003.

Rob, Mark and Rick

John, Tim and Paul - All totally sweet guys and ravers as well

I forgot these guy's names, but the one on your left has great house parties.

James - Tall, thick and tasty as a strawberry milkshake

Mark Hagopian - The Armenian Warrior

Stephen with Jim"Mini Me" behind him

Fri, 02 Jul 2004 20:29:03 GMT

Guys Gone Wild!

Who, exactly, do the makers of the infamous Girls Gone Wild video series think they're fooling with this new video featuring:

"the hottest young hunks willing to show off their young, ripped bodies and much, much more. Whether they're flexing their pecs on the beach, or dropping their pants in the clubs, guys don't get any hotter or sexier than they do on this video."

"It's about time that the women of this great nation get to see hot, young men take it off and show us what they've got," said Misty Nicole, a "Guys Gone Wild" camera girl. "I know all my friends are ready to see college aged hunks with those innocent smiles go wild!"

Uh yeah, "the women" of this great nation aren't known for their love of videos featuring "hot, young men" but the gay men of this great nation are. As a matter of fact, "Misty", I too have many friends who "are ready to see college aged hunks with those innocent smiles go wild!"

I can almost guarantee you that 80-90% of the buyers of this video, and the videos to be released afterward, including "Guys Gone Wild: Spring Break" and "Guys Gone Wild: Frat Boys." will be male homos. And a large percentage of those orders will be placed from San Francisco zip codes.

And I've already placed my pre-order in case you're wondering.

Thu, 01 Jul 2004 19:04:46 GMT

What is wrong with this man?

I thought vampires weren't supposed to age? Evidently that isn't the case with Karl Lagerfeld, either he is the exception to the rule or he was bitten while already ancienne as we say in French. Either way he of the snapping fan is looking strangely stretched and coiffed these days.

Fri, 25 Jun 2004 18:26:09 GMT

The Craziness Begins...

Yep, this weekend is San Francisco's Gay and Lesbian Pride Parade and this city is already shakin' and quakin'. Yesterday on my way to the gym I drove past the Castro, as I do every day, and there were leather daddies running around in the street. I'm sure by the end of the weekend I'll see a lot crazier than that, and not have a lot of choice in the matter.

I went to the parade in 1992, which was my freshman year in college. It was overwheming and fun, I remember it being a bright sunny day, my first time in San Francisco, and I was having a great time. This city was different then, battered by AIDS with the sunny optimism and freedom of the 70's destroyed. Now that I live here I think it's coming back, although since I was just a tyke in the 70's I couldn't say for sure.

Still, we all make do with what we have and I'm going to try and have a great time this weekend. I'm fortunate to live on a hill in San Francisco in a beautiful house overlooking the bay and with my boyfriend, who's an amazing and wonderful guy, and he's also a Jewish doctor! Who ever knew a kid from Colorado could get so lucky?

Fri, 25 Jun 2004 03:56:24 GMT

Blaine Wilson

Is that a gold metal in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Sweet blessy Jesus, this guy has already won a gold medal in my book.