A CHEESELESS PARROT Parting shots on the first debate
'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!!
THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!
Bush sounded like a parrot with early onset Alzheimer's, and like the dead parrot in the Monty Python skit, he's been nailed to his perch. Jim Lehrer was the man with the hammer and nails. The nation and world owe Lehrer an emphatic thank you for making this dog-and-pony show into something like a real debate with his astute questioning.
And like the shifty clerk played by Micheal Palin in similar skit, Bush is obviously running a cheese shop with no cheese, and Kerry in the John Cleese role amply demonstrated that.
As Fiona suggested over in the Emphasis Added comment box, that would make him a cheeseless parrot, wouldn't it?
Customer: All right. Okay. 'Have you got any?' he asked, expecting the answer 'no'.
Owner: I'll have a look, sir...
.....nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno.
Customer: It's not much of a cheese shop, is it?
Owner: Finest in the district!
Customer: (annoyed) Explain the logic underlying that conclusion, please.
Owner: Well, it's so clean, sir!
Customer: It's certainly uncontaminated by cheese....
Owner: (brightly) You haven't asked me about Limburger, sir.
Customer: Would it be worth it?
Owner: Could be....
Customer: Have you --SHUT THAT BLOODY BAZOUKI OFF!
Owner: Told you sir....
Customer: (slowly) Have you got any Limburger?
Owner: No.
Customer: Figures.Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have posed the question in the first place. Tell me:
Owner: Yessir?
Customer: (deliberately) Have you in fact got any cheese here at all.
Owner: Yes, sir.
Customer: Really?
Owner: No. Not really, sir.
Customer: You haven't.
Owner: Nosir. Not a scrap. I was deliberately wasting your time, sir.
Customer: Well I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to shoot you.
Owner: Right-Oh, sir.
(The customer takes out a gun and shoots the owner)
Customer: What a senseless waste of human life.
Read Eleanor Clift's Op Ed HERE. Read Pesky the Rat's debate transcript HERE.
