Sunday, December 19, 2004

On Apple Butter Day I failed again to do the work I promised I would do. I said yes instead to weariness and tried to pacify the implacable cold gathering in my bones. I made a fire in the stove and sank into the Big Soft Chair. I read Octavio Paz and jotted words and names-- "lentitude," "Lope de Vega"--I wanted to remember, and every page or two I slept and dreamed. I did this all the livelong day, while the apples in their ragged sacks grew softer in their skins, and the little jars, undiscovered in their caves, opened their glass mouths and sighed. 3:29:26 PM    comment []

About 50 people gathered last night at Working Winds for the Winter Solstice ceremony there. My brother and I left here around 2 o'clock and drove the little pickup 120 miles west and north across the pine barrens of the Modoc Plateau and then the middle of the Lower Klamath Wildlife Refuge at Tulelake. Just over the Oregon border lies the Chinook aerie, its gathering rooms and pond, herb garden and labyrinth. We arrived about ten minutes before the appointed time. People arrived from all points and mingled and talked and then we circled up and Robert led us through the Four Directions and a new baby was introduced to the spirits. After 90 minutes of ceremony we went to the main house to feast together. I knew no one but Robert and Sharon, and had not seen even them since October 2003, when I stayed the night there and they counseled me and helped me become strong enough to get free of the Unwanted Housemate. Still, we had a very good time and met some interesting people. A good coincidence: I had checked out a book on basic Qigong at the local library on Friday afternoon, and at the feast on Saturday I sat next to a Qigong instructor! who had trained in China and now teaches it in Klamath Falls. After the meal, some of us bundled up and went out on the hill in the moonlight and burned all the prayer tags that had spent a year tied to the trees around the place. We had a nice blaze, and Robert tossed in bound bundles of dry lavender stalks. He drummed and sang. I had to take my brother (who kept asking whether we could live there--"Ah li here") and leave then. I hugged Robert good-bye and we held onto one another a long time. Brian and I made our way through the clear cold night and came into Alturas on the last bit of gas, refilling our tank just as the station was closing at 10 o'clock, and we were home and being leaped on by many relieved and somewhat delirious animals by twenty after. It was a long way to go, but I'm glad we went. It was worth it for that hug alone! Plus they sent the leftover chocolate cake home with us... 11:01:25 AM    comment []