Ultimate Wingnut Challenge: The Low-Rent Team Vs. The Blog Stars
Okay, it's not a fair fight, but life isn't fair. I considered just letting the Blog Stars forfeit, since they are encouraging people to donate money to help the victims of Katrina (which is decent of them), but the rules say that they have to play until they are voted off.
So, on with the contest.
1. First up is the Low Rent Kaye Grogan, whose latest column is entitled "Disenfranchised Voters . . . Or Propaganda Puppets?"
Thesis: It's hard to say just what Kaye's thesis is, but I think she's claiming that America is a kleptocracy. Sure, that seems to be at odds with Kaye's adoration of George Bush and the Republican Party, but I'm sure Kaye would agree that a Foolish "consistency" is the ... Hobgoblin of "small" ... minds.
Excerpt:
Can democracy as it is right now continue to survive in America? My guess is democracy went out the window a long time ago. As technology advances, so does the capability to rig elections. Those in the know can easily rig elections by coming up with 10-20 different strategies, and make the other side look like the cheating culprits.
Once we have cast our ballots-how much trust can we put in those who count the ballots? Probably about as much trust (in some), as you can in a bank robber deciding not to rob a bank after all.
For every honest person, there is probably three or more who are dishonest--so, the odds an election can be carried out without voter fraud are pretty low.
So, there you have it: America is no longer a democracy, election officials are no better than bank robbers, and George Bush won through voter fraud. I hope Kaye's bleak views didn't unduly depress anybody.
2. Now, let's hear from Blog Star John Hindrocket from Powerline Blog (the Blog of the Year), who offers a little number called "Two Sides of Human Nature."
Thesis: In the face of a crisis like Hurricane Katrina, Republicans rescue orphans and puppies, while liberals do worse than loot by questioning George Bush's performance.
Excerpt:
Peterson and his team will be back tomorrow to rescue more infants.
That's the good. For the bad, we obviously could talk about the looters. But I think an even worse example is the appalling Sidney Blumenthal. Blumenthal authored this disgusting piece in the German magazine Spiegel.
[...]
Blumenthal wraps up with a passing reference to global warming--no mention of the fact that major hurricanes have grown less frequent over the last 70 years--and, finally, abortion! What on God's green earth abortion has to do with Hurricane Katrina, I have no idea; but Blumenthal leaves no obsession unturned, concluding with a riff on the morning-after pill.
Um, Mr. Hindrocket, Blumenthal doesn't mention abortion once in his piece -- I guess he blinded you with science.
And his point is that the Bush administration's dismissal of expert advice probably worsened the effects of the hurricane on New Orleans -- and his claim that they continue to reject scientific findings is how he brings in the morning-after pill, as anybody who can read at the 8th grade level would know.
Here's a little from the column:
In February 2004, 60 of the nation's leading scientists, including 20 Nobel laureates, warned in a statement, "Restoring Scientific Integrity in Policymaking": "Successful application of science has played a large part in the policies that have made the United States of America the world's most powerful nation and its citizens increasingly prosperous and healthy ...The administration of George W. Bush has, however, disregarded this principle ... The distortion of scientific knowledge for partisan political ends must cease." Bush completely ignored this statement.
In the two weeks preceding the storm in the Gulf, the trumping of science by ideology and expertise by special interests accelerated. The Federal Drug Administration announced that it was postponing sale of the morning-after contraceptive pill, despite overwhelming scientific evidence of its safety and its approval by the FDA's scientific advisory board.
Blumenthal doesn't "conclude" with that "riff," though, going on for another paragraph and a half.
And whether or not you agree with Blumenthal's conclusion, his point in bringing up the morning-after pill (which has nothing to do with abortion) is obvious. So, I take it they don't give reading comprehension tests in whatever law school Mr. Hindrocket attended.
It isn't easy to be a lower species of human than a looter, but I think Blumenthal qualifies.
After all, God gave the commandment "Thou Shalt Not Disparaging the Policies of the Bush Administration," but said nothing about stealing.
3. Low-Rent Ann Coulter wannabe Debbie Schlussel weighs in with "Bill Maher Passes Gas in America's Face."
Thesis: Back in 2002, Bill Maher called for higher gas prices -- and now we have higher gas prices, so Bill Maher is a big, fat, liberal jerk.
Excerpt:
When he began these rantings on ABC's "Politically Incorrect," I was a frequent guest on the show. It was comical to hear Bill espouse eco-radical measures like high gas prices, while he rode to and from his luxury home in gas-guzzling chauffer driven limos and town cars. All of his show guests--mostly brainless liberal celebs--were also driven in gas-guzzling town cars and limos. The drivers always talked about how they also picked up Bill's many girlfriends at LAX--again in the giant, gas-guzzling limos and town cars.
I take it from this bit o' bitter blather that while Debbie got to ride in a gas-guzzling chauffeur-driven (which made it guzzle even more) town car when she appeared on Bill's old show, she never got invited to appear on his new one -- and even worse, she never got to be one of his many girlfriends.
Like Maher, the rest of the entertainment industry's environmentalism is phony. The only Hollyweirdo who rides his bike to work is Ed Begley, Jr. And the only "entertainment product" he's acted in lately is the Cindy Sheehan show recently playing to a limited, unwashed audience in Crawford, Texas.
From the IMDb entry for Ed Begley Jr.:
And so on, for a total of 18 "entertainment products" in the last couple of years. IT seems that being a conservative means you never have to tell the truth -- at least, not when you're talking about Hollyweirdos.
But even though Debbie has nothing but contempt for environmentalism, I do admire the way she recycles old taunts, like the one about how antiwar protesters are "unwashed."
Although that was quite wingnutty, I think we have time for one more paragraph from Debbie:
And those people who bribe and kill for gas? FYI, Bill, as much as you love to hate the average American, that's not US. It's our Islamofascist friends in the Middle East who bribe and kill for gas--like the ones in Saudi Arabia, who seized and nationalized the oil wells WE found and developed. If we had any guts at all, we'd enter Saudi Arabia (the country which would now be part of Greater Saddamia, had we not saved its very existence) and take the oil wells back. That move would single-handedly gain back the fear and respect of the Islamic world that is now laughing at our decline while it continues its disturbing fundamentalist revivalist phase.
Wow, Debbie helped to find and develop oil wells in Saudi Arabia -- who knew?
And I hope the Bush administration seriously considers her idea of invading Saudi Arabia and confiscating its oil wells, so that the Islamic world will respect us, and we can better our relations with them. In fact, I hope George fires Karen Hughes and gives Debbie her job. It would serve everybody right.
4. Jay Tea from Wizbang Blog serves up a little something called "American Muslims Take Sides -- and It's Not Ours."
Thesis: Muslims in Lodi recently expressed concern that their religious community had been infiltrated by an FBI informant. However, they didn't turn in the Hayats for terrorism. And while the Lodi Muslims may not have known that the Hayats were terrorists (and while the Hayats may not even be terrorists -- they are only accused of lying to investigators, after all), the fact that "Muslim leaders in Lodi believe the government planted a mole in their small town to get more information on at least one of the men now at the center of a federal terror investigation," proves that Muslims can't be trusted.
Excerpt:
Over the weekend, I picked up on this story (courtesy Mike Pechar of The Jawa Report), about the militant Islamists awaiting trial in Lodi, California.
It turns out that most of the evidence against the father and son accused of being part of Al Qaeda is tape-recorded conversations, and the local community says that a man who had made himself an integral part of them has now vanished. The locals say that he must have been the FBI informant.
This is exactly why so many people -- myself included -- tend to be suspicious of the average Muslim. Here we have pretty clear evidence of a couple of would-be terrorists in their midst, and they are far more concerned with who ratted them out than the fact that they had a member of Al Qaeda living among them.
Jay gets all that from a six-sentence news story. I guess that's why he gets paid the big blogging bucks.
And the following day he offered Some Further Thoughts on Muslim Americans:
Yesterday, I spoke about the Muslim community of Lodi, California, and their apparent greater concern about an FBI informer who had been among them than a couple of their fellows who had allegedly joined Al Qaeda.
Well, the younger Hayat is alleged to have attended a terrorist training camp in Pakistan, but his father is only alleged to have lied about knowing that his son took such training. But I guess we shouldn't let the facts get in the way of our conclusions about Muslims.
This caused a bit of a heated discussion in the comments, including one person who wanted to know if I was next going to call for internment camps or Holy Wars.
That was flagrantly stupid, but I'll treat it seriously to make my point.
Jay, when you say, "This is exactly why so many people -- myself included -- tend to be suspicious of the average Muslim," then you should expect people to sarcastically ask you about interment camps.
The Muslim community of Lodi was under no legal obligation to report the alleged terrorists among them, and did not.
But I look beyond the letter of the law. Indeed, society is more than laws. What these Muslims in Lodi did was, to my way of thinking, reprehensible. And there must be consequences for their choices.
The consequence, to me, is the forfeiting of the presumption of patriotism.
Fine. Because these Muslims in Lodi failed to report to the FBI that Umer Hayat attended an al Qaeda training camp (although the only evidence of this seems to be that he hinted as much to the FBI informant, and then reportedly admitted it in an "interview"), then all American Muslims have forfeited their presumption of patriotism.
Along those same lines, because Pastor Swank has called for all Muslims to be interned or deported, then the consequence, to me, is that all conservative writers on the Internet have forfeited their presumption of not being wingnuts. Sorry about that, Jay.
5. And speaking of Pastor Swank, he was really busy yesterday, penning LA MUSLIM SLEEPER CELL OUT TO KILL; DON’T REBUILD NEW ORLEANS;
GOOD NEWS IN NEW IRAQ: SECURITY FORCES PROGRESS; STABBING BODY PARTS UNITES MUSLIM CULTISTS ; and ‘ISLAMOPHOBIA’ : THE NEW PSCYHO DISEASE?
So as to not disadvantage the other, less-prolific contestants, we'll only look at the last column.
Thesis: Islam is Satanic, and so Europe, which has laws against defaming it, is going to hell.
Excerpt:
The truth is that Islam is the chief planetary cult from hell’s fires. Allah is Lucifer. The Koran is not a holy book but an obscene manual instructing devotees to slaughter all non-Muslims. Mosques are meeting places to scheme the overthrow of all non-Muslims. Clerics are henchmen set on destroying all that is not Islamic.
So, I guess the FBI should just arrest all those Muslims whom Jay is suspicious of, because they're all plotting terrorist acts.
Any so-called religion that has a murder base must be obliterated. President George W. Bush and those of his executive officialdom must warn America of the Islamic intentions to take over the United States.
Right after we take back our Saudi oil wells, I'm sure they'll get right on it.
I note that now Mr. Bush has not referred to Islam by "peace religion" rhetoric but called it an "ideology teaching hate." I think the Chief Executive has got the message and at present in code language is changing his nomenclature to convey a more realistic definition of Islam. May it continue — more baldly, more bluntly.
I did another Google search, and can't find where Mr. Bush (or anybody else except Pastor Swank) has ever called Islam an "ideology teaching hate." So, I'm guessing that the George said this in a "code language" that only Pastor Swank picked up on. In fact, I bet he sends secret coded messages to the Pastor all the time. And so does Dora the Explorer. (I wonder if she's the one who told him about the homo nups?)
Christians who live by the Bible know how to interpret false teachings. They don’t accept all world religions as truth. They accept Christianity as the only true faith. That is because Jesus is regarded as deity and by His own statements has informed His disciples that no one comes to God the Father but via Him. Therefore, all other religions are false. More specifically, all other religions are plots of the devil to sideline mortals from the true salvation via Christ.
Yup, all religions except Swankian Christianity are plots of the devil. Dora told Pastor Swank as much in a coded message.
P.S. Be sure to check out the email, providing additional insights about the homosexual capers, which the Pastor sent to Clif.
6. And lastly, here's blog star Charles Johnson, the LittleGreenFootballs guy, with "Why the Left Keeps Losing, Exhibit NYT:
An astoundingly vicious hit piece on President Bush, at (where else?) the New York Times: Waiting for a Leader.
Once again, the leftist media is going way over the top, working every conceivable angle to damage the war effort and the Bush administration. Global warming, Kyoto Protocol, National Guard in Iraq, levee funding cuts—all the fault of President Bush. History began with his presidency, apparently, and anything bad that happens anywhere on Earth can be laid at his feet.
It’s beyond disgusting.
Well, all the NYT piece blamed Bush for was reading a glib, unhelpful speech about the hurricane damage, failing to provide any leadership, and for heading an administration which fails to acknowledge global warming -- but I'm sure Charles is right, and the NYT somehow arranged for Katrina to hit the Gulf Coast, just to damage Bush's war effort.
Oh, and the Clenis probably was behind the whole plot!
Here's another LGF post along the same lines: "Daily Kos: Katrina 'Worse Than 9/11.'"
Democratic consultant and idiotblogger Markos Moulitsas “Screw Them” Zuniga seems to have trouble distinguishing between deliberate acts of war and natural disasters. This is emblematic of the modern insane left—as they do everything possible to forget about the 9/11 atrocities.
Yes, the Daily Kos post said:
This is the greatest disaster to hit our nation in most of our lifetimes. Worse than 9-11. New Orleans is underwater. Biloxi is 90 percent destroyed. Who knows how many dead. Who knows how many homeless. Who knows how many jobless. We have a bona fide refugee crisis on our hands.
Saying that anything is "worse than 9/11" (even if it killed more people, left more people homeless, and we still have thousands in the region waiting for food, clean water, basic sanitation, and medical supplies) means that Marcos is trying to forget about the 9/11 atrocities, and is therefore objectively pro-terrorist. And since he also spoke slightingly of Bush's leadership in the face of this crisis, Marcos too is worse than a looter. It's time some people learned that free speech doesn't give them the right to speak critically of the President in time of hurricane. We should probably add this provision to the Patriot Act, so that it's not legal to do so.
Anyway, let's have a round of applause for our contestants: Kaye Grogan, John "Powerline" HIndrocket, Debbie Schlussel, Jay "Whizbang" Tea, Pastor J. Grant Swank, and Charles "LittleGreenFootballs" Johnson. (yay). Now, vote one of them off the island. Do it quickly, before one of them has to be committed. (I think you know which one the guys in the white coats would go after first).
5:19:36 AM 
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