Winners!
Here are the answers to yesterday's "Who Said It?" quiz. We will also honor the commenter who first named them correctly (commenters not only win a point for each right answer, but also a chance to bid for a multi-million dollar PR contract from the Dept. of Defense).
Plus, there is the awarding of Style Points, and the ceremonial pimp-slapping of Rush Limbaugh.
1. Pastor J. Grant Swank, Jr. - Dave
A style point to R. Porrofatto for "'Womb babies' has Swank written all over it. (Now if he were talking about killing off a bunch of scrotum babies I'm an old hand at that.)"
2. Peggy Noonan - D. Sidhe
A style point to Pete for his guess of "Gen. Buck Turgidson,"
3. Rush Limbaugh - Dave
Style points for the following:
"By following Rush's logic, our present President George is the son of the President George who was amazed at supermarket scanner technology, thus proving that our present Pres is NOT out of touch! Oh, wait...never mind" - Cynthia
"He probably should donate his considerable gelatin reserves to science and the pursuit of bubble reinforcement." - disasterman
"#3 is George Costanza, still mad that Bubble Boy beat him at Trivial Pursuit" - Tara the anti-social social worker
"Jimmy Buffett (the 'son of a son of son of a' is a dead giveaway)" - Pete
And to The tECHIDNA, for the Bizarro Rush graf (see comments for yesterday).
A style point to Dave for "Dick Cheney? Although he probably would've advocated taping your childs mouth shut, and wiring his thumbs together."
5. Ann Coulter - Bill S.
Style points for:
"Ann 'Skeletor's Mistress' Coulter" - The tECHIDNA
"Prosecuting officials for corruption is just like torturing them until they confess to false charges, and torturing people until they confess to false charges is like fraternity pranks. Got it. - theogon
6. Bill O'Reilly - Bill S.
Bill S. also also gets a style point for his very educational response: "The Second Creepiest Old Man In Wingnut Land (Now that John Derbyshire admitted to a fondness for 15-year-old girls), Bill O'Reilly."
And a style point to Tara the anti-social social worker for her answer, "Charlie Brown, the loveable loser trying to get some respect for the true meaning of Christmas, but those liberal Lucys keep pulling the football away and calling it a 'holiday ball'."
7. David Horowitz - D. Sidhe
A style point to Brad R. for "D-Ho," and to Pete for his answer of "Roy Cohn Jr."
All our winners are encouraged to save their points, which they could possibly someday trade for cool prizes such as a Dr. Laura video for kids, as available here:
Little ones will love this story-and-song presentation with Dr. Laura Schlessinger and funny puppet characters Roscoe the Racoon, Squirk the Squirrel, and others. They shalt have fun, too!
Dr. Laura singing and telling shame-based stories to funny puppets -- what kid wouldn't have fun with that?
The runners-up in the "name all our Mystery Guests in one post" portion of the contest were TomG, Cynthia, and Zen (they were each just one wingnut off). They win 6/7 of this horrific photo from the SCARED OF SANTA GALLERY.
The winner of the whole photo is Marq (in fact, he can have the whole gallery if he wants it). Here is his answer:
#1 is J. Grant "I've got my suitcase packed" Swank, jr.
#2 is Peggy "Old Grandfather whiskey, 'cos it reminds her of Ronnie" Noonan.
#3 is the Macy's Thanksgiving parade balloon of (oxy) Rush Limbaugh.
#4 is SpongeDob Stickypants, aka James Dobson.
#5 is Ann "I was a sex-slave to the Manson family... for six months!" Coulter.
#6 is Bill "They're coming to take me away" O'Reilly.
And, #7 is David "I was a teenaged pinko" Horowitz.
Congrats, Marq! (And congrats again to all our other winners.) You certainly know your wingnuts (or reasonable facsimiles of them).
Oh, and also Happy "National Chocolate covered Anything Day." (Do not let the ACLU and the secularists destroy our most sacred national day -- demand that everyone you meet give you the proper greeting for the day!)
But tomorrow is "National Maple Syrup Day," and you can let them take Christ out of that one if you want.
1:26:16 AM 
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