The Wo'C Entertainment Report
What are our favorite wingnuts saying about about movies and TV today? Let's find out!
1. WorldNetDaily's Les Kinsolving is raving about Brokeback Mountain -- here he is with "Hollywood glorifies adulterous sodomy."
In one of the most deadly phenomena of our time – or any time – Hollywood has produced a film called "Brokeback Mountain," which glorifies and glamorizes that male sodomy which remains the cause of so many thousands of deaths by AIDS – and now by syphilis.
Gee, I am so out of touch with popular entertainment that I thought the movie was about star-crossed lovers, not about butt sex. (And I had no idea that it went so far as to glamorize the specific acts of male sodomy which cause death by syphilis).
And that's why I am so grateful for WND -- because I always learn something new when I read it.
The [Washington] Post also reported that this film is the story of "two vagabonds whose lifelong affair begins in Brokeback Mountain on a chilly night in 1963. Then they part ways, marry women who don't know their secret and have children, only to reunite four years later with a deep, fiery, longing kiss that is arguably the most passionate man-on-man kiss to have been put on screen."
How really uplifting! How marvelously moral! What a glorious contribution to national morality!
How can I possibly resist seeing this inimitable osculatory foreplay to cowboy buggery?
Let me assure you that I shall resist.
Whoa, that's a relief! For a minute there, I thought that Les would go to the movie, see two men kiss, watch them engage in cowboy buggery, and then become so inflamed with unholy lust that he and fellow-audience member John Derbyshire would roger each other roundly right there in the theater.
And I am compelled to wonder when Hollywood will be producing a cowboy bestiality film – an on-the-range romance of real animal love – but only, of course, with a freely consenting beast.
When they do, I'm sure that Rick Santorum will be the technical adviser.
(Folks, in his defense, Les is a former football coach, a former vicar, an old coot who's been the Jeff Gannon of his generation for decades without anybody caring, and a kook -- so man-on-man kisses really get to him.)
2. Next up is Tammy Bruce, who has just came up with a totally new and original idea to explain why movie receipts are down this year: because Hollywood hates America!
Why, oh why, has Hollywood seen its worst boxoffice receipts in 15 years? The Golden Globe nominees for 2005 Best Picture say it all. Thought to be the precursor for the Oscar, here's what Hollywood thinks is their best of the year, and consequently what they think our culture should look like:
1) A love story between two gay sheepherders (erroneously labeled 'cowboys' by the media, I suppose because they wear hats).*
See, if Brokeback Mountain was nominated for an award by the Hollywood Foreign Press Association, then it must mean that the movie industry wants to turn our whole society into gay sheepherders.
2) A film portraying as noble the efforts of journalists to demonize and "take down" a US Senator whose anti-communist policies they did not like.*
Hmm, so Goodnight and Good Luck was about how journalists "took down" McCarthy just because they didn't like his anti-communist policies. You learn something new every day (and apparently not just at WND).
But Tammy is right -- America would be flocking to the movies if the film had been about the noble efforts of a brave US Senator to single-handedly identify the 205 known communists working at the State Department, and then gun them all down before they could steal our vital TV-dinner technology for their masters in Moscow. (I see our hero "Tailgunner" being played by a young Sylvester Stallone, with the adorable Lindsay Lohan starring as the spunky girl reporter whom Tailgunner tames and teaches to be a real woman). Songs would include the stirring "I'm a Commie-Hating Hero" (to the tune "I'm a Yankee Doodle Dandy"), and the haunting "Don't Weep for Me, John Birch Society."
I wonder if I can get Tammy to help me write the script.
3) A film about, as one movie-going reviewer noted, "...the horrors of big business and the way they are willing to experiment on the poor to achieve their goals..."*
4) The demonization of the average mid-western American man as someone who is no hero, but a cold-blooded killer at heart.*
5) And lastly, a Woody Allen film about infidelity. Well, he should know.*
Again, if a movie about one average mid-western man who turns out to be a cold-blooded killer at heart gets nominated for an award, then it must be that Hollywood thinks our entire culture should be composed of cold-blooded murderers. And the fact that The Constant Gardener, and Match Point were nominated for any Golden Globes (while Because of Winn-Dixie, a family movie about a dog that teaches us important lessons, wasn't), shows us everything that we need to know about the America-hating liberals who run Hollywood: that they also hate dogs.
And see, this is why movie revenues are down -- because decent Americans won't pay to see films about infidelity, cold-blooded killers, or horror. I think a study of box office records will bear out Tammy on this point.
Hollywood honchos continue to wring their hands over why you've stopped going to the movies. They blame ticket prices and DVD availability. They had better start considering the fact that filmmakers are so disconnected, so nihilistic, that the hopelessness and hostility they feel toward the world now permeates their work. Americans will no longer go see movies which are nothing more than the manifestation of the backwash of malignant narcissists. We're also sick and tired of listening to actors lecture us about how awful the US is, and more recently, why a cold-blooded mass murdering gang founder should have been given clemency. Enough is enough.
Personally, after learning that some actors sought to have Tookie Williams' death sentence commuted to life in prison, I vowed to never watch another movie for the rest of my life. That will teach Hollywood to claim that I'm awful!
So you can take your gay sheepherder, noble communist supporting reporters, big-business is evil, Americans are hopelessly and inherently corrupt and violent and unfaithful movies and go to Cannes where at least the Parisian set will love you. But that won't exactly pay the bills, will it?
I'll leave it to somebody else to teach Tammy about the concept of foreign box office receipts, and how they do indeed "pay the bills."
3. Lastly, here's media "expert" Brent Bozell, who's whining about how some TV awards prove the whole "hell in hand basket" thing.
The Family Friendly Programming Forum consists of several dozen major television advertisers that urge the entertainment industry to build "a commitment to and understanding of quality family entertainment."
And yet what programs did they honor? "Lost" (which shows "people being destroyed by explosives, the kind that leave pieces of flesh dangling on the shoulders of survivors"), "According to Jim" ("Would you feel comfortable putting young children on the couch with a box of popcorn to watch the episode about Jim's low sperm count?"), and the "George Lopez Show" ("'Damn, Grandma! Your boobs are huge!' says one of the children.")
What do these awards say about the mindset of the TV czars -- the producers, the carriers and the underwriters -- and their ability to define "family" TV?
That their advertisers, the people who gave out the awards, are perverts who like Grandma boobs?
Six major corporations own virtually everything aired on broadcast television as well as two-thirds of the cable channels, but it's clear these companies don't have a clue about what families want on television. Worse still, they don't want families deciding for themselves what is, and isn't, appropriate family viewing. That corporate community, along with its myriad of lobbying firms and front groups, is zestily lobbying Washington to stop decency enforcement on the public airwaves as well as cable choice on cable networks.
Yes, the TV companies don't want families deciding for themselves what is, and isn't, appropriate family viewing -- and this is unmistakably demonstrated by the fact that they are trying to stop Washington from deciding what is, and isn't, appropriate for your family.
And besides, deciding what isn't appropriate for your own personal family's viewing is Brent's job.
4:32:37 AM 
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